Deborah - Needs Advice!

[Virginia]

At our counselling session yesterday, I asked our counselor if he knew of any support groups in this area, for CD'ers? He said that there were support groups for virtually everyone but CD'ers. If I was interested in starting one he would get the local "Councelor Association" involved and involve their support, some of them may be CD'er's - who know?
Anyway, my question is have any of you done this? Started from scratch so to speak? What did you do? How did you initiate the interest? "Blind" newspaper ad? Definitely won't work by word of mouth as other than the one Gay Bar I am aware of, I have not met any other CD'ers here but we all know they are around as my counselor has workd with a couple of them, one was a prominent attorney ( he would not say who). Should I contact the nearest TRiEss organization - over three hours away? Give me some advise, please. I may not want to pursue this but its a start for this area!
Love,
Deborah

[Caroline]

Hi Deborah,

Interesting proposition: start a CD support group.

Sorry I can't give you any direct advice. For one thing, I've not done it, for another, our two societies are too different in so many respects that many of the avenues of approach that exist here, don't exist where you are, and vice versa--for example, we don't have a 'Counsellor Association', whatever that is exactly, so I don't know why you cannot just approach them directly for advice.

However, I do have a couple of general thoughts that , hopefully, you'll find useful.

First, remember that even if there was a large number of CDers in your area, the number who would come to a 'public' meeting would be fewer than that, for obvious reasons, so your target audience may not be as large as you think.

Second, if you 'host' a 'public' meeting for CDers, it exposes you to greater risks than simply going to the mall, dressed en femme. Are you, and your wife, prepared to accept those greater risks of exposure?

Third, why don't you approach your nearest Tri-Ess by e-mail or phone; they must have some ideas on the subject, and I'm sure they would be willing to offer you some help and advice.

Finally, Good Luck, and keep us advised of your progress.

Kind regards,

Caroline.

[Kay(SO)]

I would contact Triess and ask them how you can start a group in your area. They are already highly organized and could probably offer some good advice, then you can decide how you want to proceed from there. Plus, many CD'rs are familiar with Triess so they may be more apt to come to the meetings, recognizing the names. You can start a new chapter. A friend of mine was doing it.

Kay(SO)

[Virginia]

Thanks, ladies, I am taking notes.
Love, Deborah

[Beauty]

Hi Deborah,

I'm with Kay. I'd contact Tri-Ess.

Beauty

[Penny T]

Deborah,

Though I can't say for Roanoke, there are at least two currently active TG support Groups in VA (I think Rho Tau folded last year)I met the newest one's founder's last week at a friend's house where we were enjoying a barbie-cue(but my ditzy brain has lost the groups name).

TG Now.com brought these up:

Hampton Roads Transgender Outreach
P.O. Box 61606
Norfolk, VA. 23466-1606
Phone: (757) 627-4652

Metro Area Gender Alliance (MAGIA)
P.O. Box 16036
Arlington, VA 22215
Phone: (301) 949-3822
E-mail: tgea@zzapp.org (shared with TGEA)
http://www.zzapp.org/tgea (shared with TGEA)
Meetings are the 3rd Friday of each month.

Richmond-Tidewater VA Metro Area
RHO TAU
PO Box 382, Norge, VA 23127-0382
Contact: Lucy Stone
E-mail: rhotau@yahoo.com
http://www.transgender.org/rtc/

And these came from TG2TG.com:

Ladies First Social Club
7138 Little River Turnpike, Ste. 1820
Annandale, VA 22003
(540) 720-7523
http://www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/1484/
Laurabcd@aol.com

Trans-Gender Education Association
PO Box 16036, Arlington, VA 22215
(301) 949-3822
http://www.zzapp.org/tgea/
yvonneb_cd@hotmail.com
Open support group fr CDs, TVs, M2For F2M TSs, and others.

Virginia's Secret
PO Box 14716
Richmond, VA 23221
(804) 262-3906
A support group for crossdressers.

Please note that these groups may or may not still be active, as web listings sometimes linger far beyond the lifespan of the group. And there may be more groups, but at least one of these should be able to help you find what you're looking for. I think it best to point out that these groups may be 'inclusive', meaning that they may not be limited to only heterosexual crossdressers, so do be sure to ask if this is an issue. AFAIK, only Tri-Ess has Hetero-CD&SO ONLY support availlable, and a number of it's chapters have become 'inclusive' to various degrees. If you're up for a road trip, Sigma Rho Delta Chapter of Tri-Ess is in Greensboro NC, they are mildly inclusive, and I know several of them personally. There may be other Tri-Ess chapters closer and it's worth a look. While I know of NO group that is bad or harmful, they all differ so know what you're looking for, and what would be acceptable to you before going and ASK them about your concerns.

With it this easy to dig references up online, I do have to wonder about the efforts your counseller puts into this part of work. While TG'ism to any degree is uncommon, it's hardly rare, and there is a LOT to be easily found if one only looks. I would think a good counseller should know these things before treating a TG, so perhaps you can educate your counseller(and us here) with the results of your findings. Then, the next TG they see won't be left as 'on your own' as you have been, which in my eyes is highly unprofessional behavior! (and feel free to tell your counseller I said that!)

Hope this helps,

Penny T.
TG Activist & Journalist

[Virginia]

Penny,
Thanks ever so much, you are a real sweetheart! I must say that I do not know if I am ready yet to undertake the requirements to establish a "chapter" here. Roanoke is still a very conserative little town and everyone kinda knows what everyone else is doing, so I am sure that Cd'ing is closeted or maybe even fortified by any sisters here. I am not giving up the idea, but I plan to take it slow.
My position on your comment about my being left on my own. I guess I just (blindly) did not know I was. I am pretty independent with an " in your face" attitude when it comes to a lot of things. As for my Cd'ing I have passed everytime I have gone out, but one and the jury is still out on that one anyway. "Deborah" enjoys going out and "she" can take care of herself. As far as the counseling goes, I am only going to placate my SO, she thinks these guys "walk on water" "can turn water to wine", etc, so I go, I don't mince words with the guy and my wife is happy so its a small price to pay.
I promise to keep posting if and when anythink develops as to further organization development.
Again, thanks so much for your help, I have printed it off and will pursue it - slowly.
Love ya,
Deborah