Crossdressers-Haven.com

Greetings Ladies!

It is amazing to think how one can learn so much about a female (opposite sex) life style, or their perspective about males in general. There is not one day that when I go out either by myself or with friends, some guy is making an jerk out of himself, or using some form of technqiue in the hopes of picking me up, or hitting on me. Not to mentioned how uncomfortable it is to be whistled at. One can truly respect and appreciate what a real female has to put up with, in todays society.

I think that is why as CDer's we can relate with the opposite sex regarding males attitudes and their character. I'm ashame to think. I'm part of that species (male).

Any feedback girls?

Love

VickiCD.

Share your experiences with us!

Hi Vicki,

Thanks for trying to understand

Yes, being a genetic woman isn't always "fun". Don't get me wrong, I love being a woman, and couldn't imagine me any other way. It's just sometimes when I feel that I am being disrespected (gawked at). Even if I am out with my young children some men will "hoot" and "holler", I just put my head down and feel very embarrassed (that my children had to hear).

Some people wonder why genetic women don't always "dress up" all the time (just becuase they can). One reason can be......because they don't want the negative "attention" that dressing a certain way will give them. Sometimes we just don't want to be noticed, sometimes we just want to blend in.

As a young girl, I wore a tube top to school, and on the way home (I had to walk home from school) I was attacked by 2 (very large & much older) boys. (I will leave it at that)

I like to dress feminine and sometimes even a bit "sexy" (but only for my husband, and no one else) So, for me, I will dress on the more "sexy" side only if my husband is with me (I'm too petite to try to defend myself)
But, even still, it's not just the clothes, men still make "rude" comments while I'm out with my kids or sometimes even out with my husband (how rude). As a woman, I can't always wear what I would like to wear either.

I'm NOT a piece of meat!!!

P.S. Don't feel ashamed, not all men are the same, or women for that matter.

Well, I have been called, "honey" and "Darlin." I have had doors held open for me. As for male behavior, no doubt some of "us" go overboard in order to garner the female attention and most females are sophisticated enough to simply ignor the adolescent attempts to get attention. On the other hand there are those females who enjoy the adolescent attempts at getting their attention. There is the old adage:
" A man chases a woman until she catches him!"
Love,
Deborah

We crossdressers can never really expect to have a direct experience of what it's like to be female; but we do come closer than most males to walking the proverbial mile in women's shoes--both literally and figuratively.

-Celia

Love (SO) wrote:
I'm NOT a piece of meat!!!

Here here!

I've walked down the street on so many occasions where a guy would shout out of his truck, "Hey baby!" as if any woman (GG or CD) would respond POSITIVELY to something like that?

One time I was at a bar (true story) and some guy thought he was being cute & flirty by biting me on the shoulder! He was drunk, so he bit me pretty hard. I didn't take it as cute OR flirty, plus he was annoying and it really hurt. I was ready to knock him out!

Lucky for him the bartender saw this & asked him to leave.

Whenever I'm walking down the street & get those rude howls or catcalls or what have you, my first response is usually to give them the finger! )))))

But if you have kids with you, I guess ignoring them is the best bet.

Hi Lorna,

I've walked down the street on so many occasions where a guy would shout out of his truck, "Hey baby!" as if any woman (GG or CD) would respond POSITIVELY to something like that?

Yeh, what do they think our response will be? Do they honestly think we will come up to them and say, "Oooo baby!, your the kinda guy I have been looking for all my life, how about we go out sometime"? I don't think so!!

Whenever I'm walking down the street & get those rude howls or catcalls or what have you, my first response is usually to give them the finger

Well, even if my kid's weren't with me at the time (believe it or not, I do sometimes get out by myself ) I would never do that, to me that is just stooping to their level and not very ladylike I think I "get them" more by just ignoring them, because they just aren't "worth" my time

Love (SO) wrote: I'm NOT a piece of meat!!!

A plague on anyone who would suggest it of you, Love! Speaking strictly for myself, though . . . sometimes when I get into a certain mood . . . confidentially . . . I . . .



-Celia

Hi Celia,

A plague on anyone who would suggest it of you, Love!

Thanks!

I'm NOT a piece of meat!!!

I just meant, that I am a Lady and want to be treat that way, especially when I am with my children, you would think they would at least show some respect then!!!![-X

I read you loud and clear, Love--I've just got to be a kook sometimes.

Yours,
Celia

Hi all,

Vicki's point (by the way, girl, hello and pleased to meet you! ) is that, as feminine males, we have an empathic edge on other boys as far as our understanding of the feminine condition goes.

Hmmm, I'm not entirely sure that's necessarily true. I know this is previously covered ground but, as someone who's spent a lot of time with feminist friends, there's a pretty big consensus out there among women (especially feminists) that our being men presenting as women doesn't, in fact, give us any edge at all when it comes to knowing what it means to be a woman. As Celia noted, we "can never really expect to have a direct experience of what it's like to be female." Even MtF transsexuals won't gain access to that experience--they'll experience rather what it means to be a transsexual person.

Of course, that doesn't mean I don't think we CDs may not have an edge when it comes to understanding the impact those social roles traditionally assigned to women may have on our lives. Whether or not I'm a woman "in the genes," I can most surely also know (as does Lorna) what it's like to be made to feel like a piece of meat merely because of the fact that I chose to, say, wear a certain item of clothing rather than another. Even as a CD, I must constantly remind myself that, should I ever choose one day to live as a woman (with all the social freedoms and restrictions that presupposes), I will have to fight, for example, for equal pay with my male colleagues, all else being equal (well, as things now stand, anyway).

Ultimately, I do think we have an edge as crossdressers, but it's one that allows us to understand what it means, in our own society, to be feminine, not necessarily to be a woman.

Love,
CJ

CJ,

You put it well when you said:

"Even MtF transsexuals won't gain access to that experience--they'll experience rather what it means to be a transsexual person."

This is exactly what I mean when I say that a T-Girl might be a woman, but she'll never be female. She has missed much of what GG's go through in life, and lacking the internal organs of a female, she'll never really know exactly what it's really like. Those of us who are more heavily TG do have a better insight into being a woman, but many CD'ers, especially the fetishists and deeply closeted ones, just do not have the internal feminine feelings or worldly experience. On my own journey, I know where I'm going and I know much of what to expect when I arrive there, but even when I'm living as a woman I can NEVER be a female, no matter how much surgery I have. The best I will probably achieve is a rather poor and plain life as an openly TG Woman. If I do better than that it will be nice but I really expect no more than that. For me, that will be enough.

Penny T.