Crossdressers-Haven.com

I haven't visited this site in a long long time...I felt the need this evening...if nothing more than to explain to myself that everything is going to be ok. I have generalized anxiety disorder...change is not a good thing in my life...I'm also alcoholic...I do know which came first...the anxiety....since I didn't drink till I was 32...after a wife that left me pregnant with another man's kid, and 10 horrible relationships...being blackmailed and death threats from girlfriends afterwards I was done...didn't care if I lived or died...feelings were completely shut off...existing till it happened...but fashionably so ....I have now encountered gf #11....after being single, celebate, alone, and yet lonely, not miserable, for over a year and a half...she swept me off my feet.

This is a short plump woman, hispanic, lives in Texas, carries a gun and shits red, white, and blue....1/2 not my type, 1/2 my type...her personality is AWESOME and I have spent time with her in person. I know many here are liberal and I'm not a conservative...I'm libertarian...I get all your social causes...I probably don't agree with you on much past that...anyway...a good buddy of mine just had his wife leave him after 20 years of marriage...2 beautiful daughters....his heart is torn to shreds....I let him move in...rent free...under the condition he could handle seeing me in a dress...he said he didn't give a manure....

At the end of Nov...the gf will be moving here...when she was here, I told her everything and even showed her....she didn't care either...about the dressing...I'm in love with this woman...not sure I can explain it...but I found my one.....I have no plans on making her my wife soon...I'm in no hurry to get married....I have to make sure we get along and everything is good, and I'm not just acting out of loneliness. So...bringing the anxiety issue back into the picture...I now have a roomate, a gf, whom is soon moving in...gonna have a cat...already have a dog...and they've all been informed I wear dresses...fairly often. Both "say" it doesn't matter....we'll see...I find that harder to believe than the rest of it.....oh and I live in a town of 2500 people...it's common knowledge that I dress although only two who live here have seen it and I trust them. 1/2 of me feels like I should just throw it all away and be the "man" and enjoy the "normal" life....the other 1/2 knows better...it never goes away...

I hope this all turns out ok...or I'm not going to...

good luck Laura

There is always a bright star in the sky just for you, things no matter how bad with work themself out in time.

Hi Laura--
It really is good to see you again, even if you're a bit the worse for wear from all of this. A new girlfriend who says she can handle dresses is a good start for a new period in your life. I like that the town knows you are who you are, for the most part. If you're still alcoholic, I'd look to get a handle on it before your gf shows up, because love isn't going to save you from that, anymore than it "saves" you from crossdressing.

Laura, +1 on the advice that Anita gives. I'll add that I learned the hard way many years ago that you can't find happiness with others until you are content and at peace with yourself and your place in the world. You can't be good for someone else until you have your life under control. If you are looking to others to set your world right it usually ends in failure.

I hope that this time around things click for you and your new friend and that you enjoy many years together.

Hope all works out Laura.

Laura, Best of luck to you. Take it one day at a time, enjoy life....

Hugs,

Erica

and so it has begun, caught her in a lie. It was actually a series of 4 lies. They were'over something trivial, so I chose to forgive her this time...but this is always how it starts...little lies lead to big lies...

Lies are lies. Yes bigger ones are worse. But the little ones make you wonder what will come next.

Good luck.