Crossdressers-Haven.com

Girls< I have PM one of my sisters and she feels I should post - that perhaps my situation will help someone else. I will deliver this in snipettes, guess you will have to read between the lines. First I have tried to be as open and honest on this forum as I can, I have tried to help others when I felt I had something to offer, constructive, I can not believe the number of posts I have been credited with anyway, sorry if I have offended anyone or said too much or posted too much.
My wife of 27 years wants an amiable divorce! my crossdressing had nothing to do with it, then it did, then it would not have mattered if "we" had had a stronger marriage - I'm clueless.
She told our 21 year old son about the divorce. He is living in our basement with his 18 year old wife - fortunately both are working and are going to school, she now says that "we" should have told him together, but the time just seemed right for her to tell him - nice! real nice!
He, my son calls my daughter who is married, 2 kids, and was told about my crossdressing back in November, by - you guessed it, my wife. Anyway my son is asking her why she did not tell him, Tell him what?? she says that your dad is a crossdresser? He did not have a clue about that, he was asking why she did not tell him about the divorce!
My daughter and I talked today, rather she lectured me on how I never think with my heart but always my head. It ended rather ugly, oh she is my daughter by my first marrige to an, unknown to me at the time of that divorce, a drug addict!
My wife and her girl friend (single/divorced) from high school are leaving Monday for Myrtle Beach for a three day "vacation."
I have not talked to my son yet as all this happened to him Saturday evening and I was not even aware of what had happened! Oh I did not mention that we as a family (my son only and wife) went to counselling several years ago and I just happened to mention that I did not think it was "normal" for a mother and her 11 year old son to be sleeping in the same bed together, even if nothing was going on!
My daughter said I should have taken my wife to Europe like she had hinted at, using money that we did not have or had set aside for retirement. No offense to my sisters "across the pond" but I did not lose anything in Europe!
I did tell my powerlifting training partner Saturday, about my crossdressing and knowing her like I do, she took it like I thought she would - cool!!! It is a way for a man to express a part of himself that if he has it he should!
Well I will say this for my own edification, I am a nice person, I would not intentionally hurt anyone, I am a crossdresser and will be till I am dead and buried, I have never physically or (God forbid) mentally abused my wife, never cheated on her, I tried to give her every thing (physical) that she wanted (that was my short coming I guess, according to my daughter, I think with my head and not my heart??)
Well the saga continues - how it will end in the divison of property, where I will be months from now - who knows, but I will still be a crossdresser and continuously exploring my gift and still sharing it.
PLEASE I DO NOT WANT SYMPATHY OR ADVICE, OR CRITICISM,
At my age I will just roll with the punches and one foot in front of the other. And I am still looking forward to SCC in Atlanta!
DON'T ANYONE FEEL SORRY FOR ME -= IT IS MY LOT IN LIFE AND I WILL DEAL WITH IT!!
I don't know how this is or will help anyone, but there it is and unless Sharon of Beauty or CJ bans me from this forum, I will still be here.
Love you girls!
Virginia - now where is that submit button - I can only stare at it just so long.

Well Sis.

You make it hard to respond.

IT IS MY LOT IN LIFE AND I WILL DEAL WITH IT!!

With an attitude like that you don't need SYMPATHY OR ADVICE, OR CRITICISM,

While I have to commend you for you attitude which I believe is right on target. You are also human, and this won't be easy stuff to deal with. I just want to convey to you that I want to be here for you if there is any way I can make this load lighter for you. Feel free to contact me if you think I can help.

Thanks, Sis,
No I don't need to impose on anyone while navigating this "bump on my Magical Mystery Tour!" I guess I have always had to depend on myself all my life and this is no different. For me and it is not meant to be self-serving, but if I screw up ain't nobody's fault but mine.
Hell, I am already working on purchasing another motorcycle! So yes, 27 years and a sudden death of a relationship can be difficult, but I am to old and I guess to stubborn to care about that anymore. Tomorrow the sun will come up, the day will offer all kinds of new and challenging opportunities and I intend to grap it by the throat and have my way with all the opportunities!
Don't be concerned, I gave it a shot, hell I gave it a lot of shots and it did not work, so one foot in front of the other and as Jackie Gleason said,"
and AAAAAWWWWWWAAAYYY we go!!"
Love ya,
Virginia

Well at least we can offer you a friendly sholder to lean on while you are exploring the next leg of the tour.

Hugs to you.
Honey

Hey Sis,

And you did not see how posting this could be helpful?
What a fine example of being able to let go of a dead issue, and move forward. I wish I had that kind of insight when I was where you are at. I eventually had to reach that point, but it cost me a lot of un-necessary pain getting there.

God gave us heads to think, hear, speak and see with, and yours seems fine to me.

Hey Girl - you gave it all you had, now, GO GO and don't look back.

Hi all,

Virginia:

We'll be here, if need be.

Love,
CJ

Virginia,

It sounds like you can really use a get-away to SCC now more than ever sweetie.

Hugs,
Wendy

I am impressed by your remarkable resolve.

Chantelle

A true stoic.

Hi Virginia,

Tomorrow the sun will come up, the day will offer all kinds of new and challenging opportunities and I intend to grap it by the throat and have my way with all the opportunities!
Don't be concerned, I gave it a shot, hell I gave it a lot of shots and it did not work, so one foot in front of the other and as Jackie Gleason said,"
and AAAAAWWWWWWAAAYYY we go!!"

Rock on sister!!!

I'll be here if you need anything

*Hugs & Love*

Virginia,
Well it sounds like you have a handle on things . Like Wendy said, SCC should be a good way to unwind for you.
See ya soon!
Hugs
Cindy

Hi Virginia,

This is just to send you love, and in truckloads at that.

Take good care of yourself during this change in life, and .........stating the obvious.........

........should you need us........Yer....should you need us....

and if you need a helping hand, just look over your shoulder honey, We'll be there, youv'e got friends

Love
Rebecca xxx

ps- I seem to be in the mood for qoutes tonight

Virginia,

You know how I admire you, and let me offer you this one thing I can offer without offering sympathy, advice, or critisism.

I offer to uncondionally accept and love you as the person you are. A human being, doing her best to catch a "Magic Carpet Ride" on this Magical Mystery Tour.

If I could offer more I would, and if you change your mind and need something more, I will offer what I can. I know you are strong and will get past this "bump", and I know you will do it by going through not around.

I have learned much from you sister, I would only ask you to read your own posts, and take your own advice. It was good advice for me.

Love always,
Elizabeth

Hi Virginia-
As in my post to Julie, I would just say, "I want whatever is best for all concerned." I have no idea what that is for you, so that is my wish in situations like this one.

You seem to have a positive attitude, so I think things will work out for you. It may take a while to see through the confusion.
Love,
Anita

Thanks again girls for all your support!
My wife returns tonight from a six day vacation with her girl friend, tonght. They spent the week in Myrtle Beach.
I have a good attorney, if it comes to that, so we will see.
Love ya' all,
Virginia