Elizabeth I will borrow some of your strength and Julie some of your insight and CJ and Beauty your understanding and from the rest of my sisters the feminine power to carry on. You know the struggles I am dealing with, going from a pending divorce to discovering that my SO's "problems" with me were not me but a virius in her brain causing her to thing and then to act irrationally. Spending three weeks by her hospital bed hoping and praying that she would recover (please it is not meant to be self-serving or to blow smoke up your skirts) but nary an hour passed that I did not think about my sisters here on this forum. The trials and tribulations that most of you have been through, then for us to come together in this forum and to offer the love, empathy and support that we have all experienced - God! What blessing She has bestowed upon us!!
I do not mean to ramble my point is this without Virginia I do not know if I could have made it this far. Regardless of where you may be in your "Magical Mystery Tour" I am given reinforcement every day that women are NOT - NO WAY - NO HOW the weaker sex! Changing and washing wet clothes, bedding at all hours of the day and night, helping my wife in and out of the bed, to the toilet, the bathtub, changing clothes, cooking, cleaning, feeding and seven different prescriptions at all different hours as well as four different IV's that have to be administered twice daily. I am sorry, but guys were just not cut out for this. Virginia has taken over and without complaint does it all. This Index is called "Do You Know How I Feel?" I hope that none of my sisters are ever in this situation, but if you are, step back and let the woman in you take over or you just won't make it. I am at a loss for words to describe exactly what is going on with me other than Virginia is in charge and if the male side even hints at a complaint she "kicks his butt!" I'm sorry, but if you have never experienced this you probably have no idea what I am talking about, and I hope and pray that you never do, but, .... but if you do, just let her have her way and you will be absolutely amazed at what will transpire. You don't think about sleep or how tired you may feel or what tasks are upcoming, the woman simple "gets the job done" "whatever it takes" no complaints, no if's and's or but's. It is amazing, Virginia is amazing and was I not who I am I am sure the male would have collapsed in the prenatal position long ago!!
Love you all,
Virginia
Feminine power
Moderators: KimberlyS, Eileen (SO)
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Virginia
- Goddess of the Universe
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- Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2004 4:06 pm
- Location: Strange Magic Hill
Feminine power
First star to the right, then straight on 'till mornin!
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Terri(SO)
- Miss Platinum Goddess
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Loretta Ann
- Permanently Banned
- Posts: 2199
- Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2004 11:30 pm
- Location: Vancouver, Canada
It is interesting to hear you describe it like that Sis.
You are right I don't understand it. I was married to a woman who would not have done what you are doing, so I find it hard to understand what it is you are trying to get across here. It sounds to me like it has more to do with who you are as an individual than it does with two different people. Perhaps you are just more complete by em-brassing the reality that Virginia is also apart of you.
At least that is how it appears to me. But that may be only this Girls opinion.
Love Darlene.
You are right I don't understand it. I was married to a woman who would not have done what you are doing, so I find it hard to understand what it is you are trying to get across here. It sounds to me like it has more to do with who you are as an individual than it does with two different people. Perhaps you are just more complete by em-brassing the reality that Virginia is also apart of you.
At least that is how it appears to me. But that may be only this Girls opinion.
Love Darlene.
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Elizabeth
- Miss Ruby Goddess
- Posts: 1878
- Joined: Mon May 03, 2004 3:02 am
Hi Virginia,
It sounds to me as if you are embracing all that is you. And realizing that emotional strength can carry you much farther than physical strength. I have watched you grow throughout the time I have known you. I have watched you embrace Virginia, which in my opinion is not a seperate person, but is the part of you that is female. You have realized that by embracing her, you have strengths that you never had as just a man, in denial about the true nature of who you were.
Yes Virginia, there is a female part of you. And it has qualities and strengths that you do not have without her. But it is my opinion that she is you. Her inner strength is your inner strength. For me, embracing Elizabeth was not embracing a part of who I was, it was an admission that Elizabeth is the "whole me" and my male characteristics were just a fraction of me, that limited my potential.
I know you don't agree with most of this, but I truely beleive it. But whatever it is, as long as you can draw strength from it, I am happy for you. I wish you continued strength and peace of mind.
Love always,
Elizabeth
It sounds to me as if you are embracing all that is you. And realizing that emotional strength can carry you much farther than physical strength. I have watched you grow throughout the time I have known you. I have watched you embrace Virginia, which in my opinion is not a seperate person, but is the part of you that is female. You have realized that by embracing her, you have strengths that you never had as just a man, in denial about the true nature of who you were.
Yes Virginia, there is a female part of you. And it has qualities and strengths that you do not have without her. But it is my opinion that she is you. Her inner strength is your inner strength. For me, embracing Elizabeth was not embracing a part of who I was, it was an admission that Elizabeth is the "whole me" and my male characteristics were just a fraction of me, that limited my potential.
I know you don't agree with most of this, but I truely beleive it. But whatever it is, as long as you can draw strength from it, I am happy for you. I wish you continued strength and peace of mind.
Love always,
Elizabeth
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Virginia
- Goddess of the Universe
- Posts: 5543
- Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2004 4:06 pm
- Location: Strange Magic Hill
Thanks girls, I truly appreciate your responses.
Elizabeth, it is perhaps that I started before you, but you have "transistioned" to a point I have not reached. I do understand what you are saying.
Darlene, Sis, I guess for me the bottom line is were I not a CD'er and accepting myself as such and the emergence of Virginia to give me the strength I need to "carry-on" I don't think I would make it!
We can analyze and over analyze who we are with and without our female side, self, ego, whatever. Right now as I said I don't care, all I know is it is working for me, giving me strength that I never knew I had and I LOVE IT!!!!!
Love you all,
Virginia
Elizabeth, it is perhaps that I started before you, but you have "transistioned" to a point I have not reached. I do understand what you are saying.
Darlene, Sis, I guess for me the bottom line is were I not a CD'er and accepting myself as such and the emergence of Virginia to give me the strength I need to "carry-on" I don't think I would make it!
We can analyze and over analyze who we are with and without our female side, self, ego, whatever. Right now as I said I don't care, all I know is it is working for me, giving me strength that I never knew I had and I LOVE IT!!!!!
Love you all,
Virginia
First star to the right, then straight on 'till mornin!
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Kathy
- Miss Platinum Goddess
- Posts: 433
- Joined: Sun May 30, 2004 2:38 pm
- Contact:
Virginia,
Your current situation brings back so many memories of recent events for me. I want to refer back to my post from last July regarding my journey http://crossdressers-haven.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=1673.
Yes, I do understand how you feel. While my situation was different from yours, my "duties" were very much the same. I had to learn how to give injections, administer IVs, make sure prescriptions were taken on time and all the other things that are commonly thought of in reference to "nursing".
And, yes, in that time I often felt that "if it were not for Kathy then Keith would never have survived the ordeal". But, the more I thought of that and, as I mentioned in the previous post, as I asked "who am I?", the more I realised that Keith and Kathy were both me.
In reading Jung's anima theory and thinking back on that time, I guess it was not so much a process of integrating the two but more of a realization that the two were already integrated. That they both drew strength from each other. That one could not exist without the other.
But it was not until I came to this forum that the reality of that truely hit home.
Just know that the strength is within you and that strength will carry you through this, whatever it takes.
There is one thing that I hope the nurses and doctors are talking to you about... It is extremely important that you find time for yourself. It is very easy to get so caught up in caring for a loved one that we forget to take care of ourselves. So, please, find time to catch your breath and relieve your own stress. It is OK to be selfish from time to time.
My thoughts are with you.
Your current situation brings back so many memories of recent events for me. I want to refer back to my post from last July regarding my journey http://crossdressers-haven.com/forums/viewtopic.php?t=1673.
Yes, I do understand how you feel. While my situation was different from yours, my "duties" were very much the same. I had to learn how to give injections, administer IVs, make sure prescriptions were taken on time and all the other things that are commonly thought of in reference to "nursing".
And, yes, in that time I often felt that "if it were not for Kathy then Keith would never have survived the ordeal". But, the more I thought of that and, as I mentioned in the previous post, as I asked "who am I?", the more I realised that Keith and Kathy were both me.
In reading Jung's anima theory and thinking back on that time, I guess it was not so much a process of integrating the two but more of a realization that the two were already integrated. That they both drew strength from each other. That one could not exist without the other.
But it was not until I came to this forum that the reality of that truely hit home.
Just know that the strength is within you and that strength will carry you through this, whatever it takes.
There is one thing that I hope the nurses and doctors are talking to you about... It is extremely important that you find time for yourself. It is very easy to get so caught up in caring for a loved one that we forget to take care of ourselves. So, please, find time to catch your breath and relieve your own stress. It is OK to be selfish from time to time.
My thoughts are with you.
Whatever you accomplish in life is a manifestation not so much of what you do, as of what you believe deeply within yourself that you deserve. - Les Brown
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Virginia
- Goddess of the Universe
- Posts: 5543
- Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2004 4:06 pm
- Location: Strange Magic Hill
Kathy, Yes I do remember reading your posts about having to take care of, I believe it was your parents and that you live in the wilds of Vermont.
I know you can identify with my situation and the strength that comes from who we are!!
And you are right about time for one's self, but as you know it can be a big challenge when the object of our affection is bedridden and qualified help is well, few and far between, but right now "we" are coping. Small things really help, as you know. The "proper" underware, a bit of make-up painted toe nails, some perfume - all go a long way toward maintaining one's balance. Actually Virginia seems quite content right now with those few things and being able to administer the necessary caring to keep things going.
Thanks for your interest and concern.
Love ya,
Virginia
I know you can identify with my situation and the strength that comes from who we are!!
And you are right about time for one's self, but as you know it can be a big challenge when the object of our affection is bedridden and qualified help is well, few and far between, but right now "we" are coping. Small things really help, as you know. The "proper" underware, a bit of make-up painted toe nails, some perfume - all go a long way toward maintaining one's balance. Actually Virginia seems quite content right now with those few things and being able to administer the necessary caring to keep things going.
Thanks for your interest and concern.
Love ya,
Virginia
First star to the right, then straight on 'till mornin!
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Loretta Ann
- Permanently Banned
- Posts: 2199
- Joined: Tue Feb 24, 2004 11:30 pm
- Location: Vancouver, Canada
Hey Sis.We can analyze and over analyze who we are with and without our female side, self, ego, whatever.
For me it is not a matter of analyzing so much as it is attempting to understand what it is that you are saying, so that I can understand you better. I enjoy learning how other people see things, and did not intend to cause you to become defensive.
You should enjoy who you are to the fullest. How you wish to describe that part of you really does not matter, other than in respect to the kind of communication with others that enables them to understand you.
Love Darlene.
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Ronnie M
- Inactive
- Posts: 117
- Joined: Tue Jan 30, 2007 9:44 pm
- Location: Upper Midwest USA
Virginia;
I am having great difficulty understanding what you are talking about...
but
listed for what-it's-worth-dept:
male/female...don't make no nevermind in MY head...
either someone has enough love, and enough guts/backbone to endure,..or they don't.
and I am NOT going to go into "this is my story to prove it" thing.
just take my word for this pretty please,....
there was a time, feb 1973...when my own task came to hand,..and I had to resolve to be able to do the dirty job.
I DO admire you Virginia. I love what you write ..every time I see one of your replies or self stories.
you have my admiration and deep respect.
veronica in Wi
but
listed for what-it's-worth-dept:
male/female...don't make no nevermind in MY head...
either someone has enough love, and enough guts/backbone to endure,..or they don't.
and I am NOT going to go into "this is my story to prove it" thing.
just take my word for this pretty please,....
there was a time, feb 1973...when my own task came to hand,..and I had to resolve to be able to do the dirty job.
I DO admire you Virginia. I love what you write ..every time I see one of your replies or self stories.
you have my admiration and deep respect.
veronica in Wi