Introducing Maggie

[Bernice]

Welcome!

We all try to provide only acceptance and understanding here. I do not believe it is appropriate for anyone to flame any constructive participant on a forum like this, because flaming is the perfect dis-incentive to continued sharing of ideas, thoughts, and feelings.

I'm sure most of us have watched "Tootsie" and "Mrs Doubtfire", and admired these actors for their efforts.

Still, because I have paid a high price for crossdressing since 1965, and it is something I have tried valiantly to suppress in my early years, I do wonder what your motivation is for joining our group. You don't have to justify yourself to anyone, least of all me. Come one, come all who seek to give and receive support. However, I seek to understand, and I think you probably also seek a deeper understanding of yourself.

Hopefully, together we can provide that.

Bernice

[Amber(SO)]

Maggie,
There are many CDs who do not dress for the sexual stimulation of it. Many dress because this lets another part of their personality come forth. Expressing themselves in a feminine way is an outlet. They do not feel comfortable trying to be sensitive and graceful in "boy mode", so they must dress the part. Just as in acting, when you dress the part, you can express yourself fully. There is not alot of difference, except the compulsion. It seems as though you have had a wonderful experience as Maggie, and you don't want to let it go. This is not that different than the first time a 12 year old boy tries on a pair of pantyhose, and savors the experience. (It felt so good, I don't want to stop. Maybe if I try something a little more, it will feel even better.) And so on. I think you are possibly trying to find a reason for dressing as Maggie. In a nutshell, she made you "Feel like a woman," and you enjoyed it so much, you want more. It's kind of addictive for some, like your first applause. I hope this makes sense, and helps. Those people who called it a multiple personality disorder, don't know squat. You wouldn't neccessarily know about Maggie if that were true. Good luck sweetheart.
Amber

[Maggie]

It's true that I did have a wonderful experience as Maggie, and I hate to let her go. I am both enamored and proud of the character I created. I find great comfort and satisfaction in looking at her smiling pictures.

However, now that I have all the good pictures I need and have successfuly performed as her at TG support group meetings, on stage, and out in public, I feel that I've gained whatever I needed from this experiment. Because I can enjoy looking at Maggie's pictures and remembering her experiences, I have less incentive or excuse to incur all the trouble and risk (as well as the distress to my wife) involved in dressing, putting on makeup, and venturing out in public again. Furthermore, the experience of being Maggie is emotionally intense, and while I have enjoyed the temporary euphoria, I have found it to be psychologically disorienting.

My need for self expression is now being satisfied to a large extent by acting a variety of male roles in community theater. As for clothing, I can enjoy the freedom and comfort of skirt-like garments by wearing men's kilts, Utilikilts, etc., which I find much more practical, comfortable, and socially acceptable than women's clothing.

I guess what I am trying to figure out now is what label to affix to myself - not that I care that much about labels myself, but it seems to be important to other people, including my wife.

Basically my attitude is: (a) I'm not interested in wearing women's clothing per se, but I have very much enjoyed the experience of impersonating a woman (Maggie) on a number of occasions; (b) I feel there is nothing morally wrong with a man cross-dressing, although I am aware that there can be various negative aspects in many cases; (c) I myself definitely prefer to be male, although I enjoy looking at pictures of my female creation; and (d) I may like to become Maggie again if an appropriate opportunity arises, but I feel no particular urgency to do so.

So, does this qualify me as a CD, TV, TG, female impersonator, or what?

I'm not trying to "distance" myself from the CD/TG community. I have been treated warmly at most of the TG support group meetings I attended and by most people on the Internet groups. However, I sense that some people resent my success in passing reasonably well as a woman, while men who feel a much greater need to cross-dress than I are not able to pass as female. And then there were the flamers on the CDDF message board who made me feel totally unwelcome.

While I think I probably come within a broad definition of CD (since I have enjoyed cross-dressing), that label may be inappropriate or misleading if, in fact, I am significantly unlike the great majority of men who identify themselves as CDs. What do you think?

[Beauty]

. . . While I think I probably come within a broad definition of CD (since I have enjoyed cross-dressing) . . . I am significantly unlike the great majority of men who identify themselves as CDs. What do you think?

Hi Maggie,

Yes, in my very non-professional diagnosis I think you are a crossdresser. Your experiences and represenation are the same as a common (if there is such a thing) trait among CD'rs. You enjoy enjoy crossdressing.

I don't think you are out of the norm. I feel that you are very articulate with your words and you speak for another silent group who feel the same way, but are puzzled why they don't only want to play male characters.

You are right about the people can be mean if you're passable, there's lots about that on the web, but it's buried deep because it's not something you talk about without getting put down for even mentioning it.

I say, enjoy who you are. There doesn't need to be an explanation.

It would be great to hear some of your real life tales in another area.

Beauty