A Friendly Hello to All.
Posted: Sat Feb 12, 2005 3:53 pm
Hi Everyone.
This is the very first time I have ever really joined any site. I am 50+ person who has been dressing up or wishing I were dressed up almost my entire life. I started with the feelings back when I was probably around 7 or 8. I always wanted to play with the girls in the neighborhood but was always shunned away and got told to go play with the boys. Back then I remember doing a lot of crying because all I ever really wanted to be is just “one of the girls”. I remember telling my Mother my feelings about it and she was very angry with me and said that I need to forget all about those thoughts because if my Dad were to find out about it, I would be in serious trouble and she did not know what he might do to me. He was very mean back then and I was extremely afraid of him.
My first real cross-dressing experience was when I was about 9 or 10 years old. I had been looking through ads in the papers and catalogs and was very intrigued about women’s underwear and hosiery. I was spending the night at my grandmother’s house and she always had nylon stockings hanging all over the bathroom. One evening I took a pair and put them on out of curiosity. The rest of my story is probably similar to most others. I had sisters to borrow and steal from. I got caught once by my mother when I was 15 with a load of their missing clothes. She proceeded to wash my mouth out with soap and pulled on my ears until I thought they were going to come off. She was still afraid to tell my Father what she found. She thought I was gay and I told her no, I just had a deep desire to wear their clothes. I liked them so much better. Her response was simply it was too bad but I was not born the right gender to wear them.
I went through my first marriage and got divorced after many years. She knew of my desires and kind of wanted it kept as a “don’t ask – don’t tell” policy. My second wife is much more understanding and knows that I do it but does not want any part of it. She just constantly makes little jokes about it all the time.
I have gone out in public on several occasions. Twice I believe that I passed very well and was never read but the rest were not very great experiences. I look back on it and most of the bad experiences were my fault as I did not spend the time or I was dressed inappropriately for the occasion. I have pretty much given up going out anymore but still dress to the max when I can which is mostly on longer business trips. I get the most joy out of spending an entire week-end dressing but the opportunities are rare anymore.
Growing up in the late 50’s and 60’s I became very fond of the older clothing and lingerie. I especially love the old girdles, stockings, petticoats, and the old bouffant dresses. However, I love most everything feminine that I can get my hands on. Although my wife I don’t believe wants be to dress in front of her, she knows I enjoy the femme things and is always doing things like squirting me with her perfume and doing pedicures and manicures together. Of course it is clear polish (yuck) for me. I am happy with my life but often wish I could dress more often and feel comfortable doing it. A life-long dream of mine is to live as a woman for at least a month solid with no opportunity to stop (i.e. being forced to do it and not have anything else to wear). I often wonder how that would go.
It has felt really good to express myself here for the first time. I hope I have not been to wordy. I have always been a silent one reading in the background and thought I could at least try this. My inner self has always been Wendy but obviously that is not my real name. I classify myself as “gender-confused” and will leave it as that.
This is the very first time I have ever really joined any site. I am 50+ person who has been dressing up or wishing I were dressed up almost my entire life. I started with the feelings back when I was probably around 7 or 8. I always wanted to play with the girls in the neighborhood but was always shunned away and got told to go play with the boys. Back then I remember doing a lot of crying because all I ever really wanted to be is just “one of the girls”. I remember telling my Mother my feelings about it and she was very angry with me and said that I need to forget all about those thoughts because if my Dad were to find out about it, I would be in serious trouble and she did not know what he might do to me. He was very mean back then and I was extremely afraid of him.
My first real cross-dressing experience was when I was about 9 or 10 years old. I had been looking through ads in the papers and catalogs and was very intrigued about women’s underwear and hosiery. I was spending the night at my grandmother’s house and she always had nylon stockings hanging all over the bathroom. One evening I took a pair and put them on out of curiosity. The rest of my story is probably similar to most others. I had sisters to borrow and steal from. I got caught once by my mother when I was 15 with a load of their missing clothes. She proceeded to wash my mouth out with soap and pulled on my ears until I thought they were going to come off. She was still afraid to tell my Father what she found. She thought I was gay and I told her no, I just had a deep desire to wear their clothes. I liked them so much better. Her response was simply it was too bad but I was not born the right gender to wear them.
I went through my first marriage and got divorced after many years. She knew of my desires and kind of wanted it kept as a “don’t ask – don’t tell” policy. My second wife is much more understanding and knows that I do it but does not want any part of it. She just constantly makes little jokes about it all the time.
I have gone out in public on several occasions. Twice I believe that I passed very well and was never read but the rest were not very great experiences. I look back on it and most of the bad experiences were my fault as I did not spend the time or I was dressed inappropriately for the occasion. I have pretty much given up going out anymore but still dress to the max when I can which is mostly on longer business trips. I get the most joy out of spending an entire week-end dressing but the opportunities are rare anymore.
Growing up in the late 50’s and 60’s I became very fond of the older clothing and lingerie. I especially love the old girdles, stockings, petticoats, and the old bouffant dresses. However, I love most everything feminine that I can get my hands on. Although my wife I don’t believe wants be to dress in front of her, she knows I enjoy the femme things and is always doing things like squirting me with her perfume and doing pedicures and manicures together. Of course it is clear polish (yuck) for me. I am happy with my life but often wish I could dress more often and feel comfortable doing it. A life-long dream of mine is to live as a woman for at least a month solid with no opportunity to stop (i.e. being forced to do it and not have anything else to wear). I often wonder how that would go.
It has felt really good to express myself here for the first time. I hope I have not been to wordy. I have always been a silent one reading in the background and thought I could at least try this. My inner self has always been Wendy but obviously that is not my real name. I classify myself as “gender-confused” and will leave it as that.
. Gee you bring back memorys to me about reading catologs in your youth 
. I too would look at a sears catolog and dress myself from it, starting with undies and working my way to a dress or skirt and in my mine could see a very pretty girl (me) 
. Enjoy the forum as the ladies are the best, 
Carol Ann
That was a great little intro and, no, not too wordy (remember: what can take an hour to write is often read in no more than three or four minutes).