Elephant Gun

We all like jokes, humor and other funny stuff, so let's lighten things up a bit with a few laughs (or groans, as the case may be)!!

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Debbie Jean
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Elephant Gun

Post by Debbie Jean »

An Iowa family was driving through Western Nebraska on their way to their Colorado vacation. They became hungry, so they stopped at a small “Mom & Pop” type restaurant, and ordered some lunch.

While they were waiting for their food to come, the husband spotted an unusual looking gun hanging on the wall behind the cash register, so he went over there for a closer look.

The conversation went something like this:

Proprietor: “Something I can help you with?”
Customer: “Yes, that’s an unusual looking gun you have there. What do you use it for?”
Proprietor: “That’s an elephant gun, my friend. Mighty good one too, I might add.”
Customer: “Elephant gun? Don’t be silly, there’s no elephants in Nebraska!”
Proprietor: “I told you it was a good gun, didn’t I?”
Carol Elizabeth
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Re: Elephant Gun

Post by Carol Elizabeth »

And how does one kill a purple elephant?

You shoot him with a purple elephant gun - of course!

But, how does one kill a pink elephant?

Well, you need to squeeze his testicles till he turns purple
and then you shoot with a purple elephant gun.

Of course - if it is female pink elephant - you are just out of luck!
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside a dog, it's too dark to read.
Debbie Jean
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Re: Elephant Gun

Post by Debbie Jean »

Carol Elizabeth, was that last elephant joke you told a trunk-ated version?

just wondering,
Deb


p.s.
Along those same lines, when she was a little girl, my daughter was starting to learn how to tell time. She would stare at clocks around the house to check herself on this. One time when my wife and I took her to the circus, I noticed her staring at my wrist watch. I didn't say anything. Finally, just as the elephants were coming out of the chute, she asked me what time it was. I replied: "Honey, it's elephant time". With eyes as big as saucers, she gazed up at me and said: "Daddy, I don't see any elephants coming out of your watch". Out of the mouths of babes!
Eileen (SO)
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Re: Elephant Gun

Post by Eileen (SO) »

You kill pink elephants with aspirin till the hangover subsides.

Eileen
Not only a wife, a girlfriend too!
Carol Elizabeth
Miss Emerald Goddess
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Joined: Thu Jun 14, 2007 7:30 am
Location: Wisconsin

Re: Elephant Gun

Post by Carol Elizabeth »

And while we are on the subject,

Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?

So he could hide in a cherry tree.

Now I realize that most of you have not seen an elephant in a cherry tree -
so it proves what good camouflage it really is.
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside a dog, it's too dark to read.
Eileen (SO)
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Joined: Mon Sep 02, 2013 10:29 pm
Location: Near Chicago

Re: Elephant Gun

Post by Eileen (SO) »

"I once shot an elephant while in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas, I'll never know."

Capt. Spaulding (Groucho Marx)

Carol Elizabeth wrote:Now I realize that most of you have not seen an elephant in a cherry tree -
so it proves what good camouflage it really is.
And here I thought we're going to have a bumper crop of cherries!



Eileen
Not only a wife, a girlfriend too!
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