Dumb questions
Posted: Thu Feb 26, 2009 11:59 am
When someone asks you a dumb question . .. . don't you
> just wish you could respond like you really wanted to?
>
> Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for
> Sophie the wonder dog at Wal-Mart and was about to check
> out, when a woman behind me asked me if I had a dog.
>
> Well... Looking at the bag and realizing that it actually
> did say DOG FOOD, in big bold letters. . . I was a little
> bit curious . . .
>
> So . . . since I'm retired with little to do, on
> impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog. I was
> starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably
> shouldn't because I had ended up in the hospital the
> last time. But since I'd lost 50 pounds, before I
> awakened in the intensive care ward with tubes coming out of
> most of my orifices and IVs in both arms, I had decided to
> give it another try.
>
> I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that
> the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with
> Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel
> hungry. The food is nutritionally complete, so I was going
> to try it again and just be a little more careful this time.
> (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the
> line was by now listening and enthralled with my story.)
>
> Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care
> because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped
> off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's backside and a car hit
> us both.
>
> I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart
> attack, he was laughing so hard, he fell.
>
> Wal-Mart has now taken away my shopping privileges.
> just wish you could respond like you really wanted to?
>
> Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for
> Sophie the wonder dog at Wal-Mart and was about to check
> out, when a woman behind me asked me if I had a dog.
>
> Well... Looking at the bag and realizing that it actually
> did say DOG FOOD, in big bold letters. . . I was a little
> bit curious . . .
>
> So . . . since I'm retired with little to do, on
> impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog. I was
> starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably
> shouldn't because I had ended up in the hospital the
> last time. But since I'd lost 50 pounds, before I
> awakened in the intensive care ward with tubes coming out of
> most of my orifices and IVs in both arms, I had decided to
> give it another try.
>
> I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that
> the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with
> Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel
> hungry. The food is nutritionally complete, so I was going
> to try it again and just be a little more careful this time.
> (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the
> line was by now listening and enthralled with my story.)
>
> Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care
> because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped
> off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's backside and a car hit
> us both.
>
> I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart
> attack, he was laughing so hard, he fell.
>
> Wal-Mart has now taken away my shopping privileges.