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The Dead Horse Theory of Government

Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2012 9:57 pm
by Kyra
The Dead Horse Theory of Government

The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says that "When you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount."

However, in government more advanced strategies are often employed, such as:

1. Buying a stronger whip.

2. Changing riders.

3. Appointing a committee to study the horse.

4. Arranging to visit other countries to see how other cultures ride dead horses.

5. Lowering the standards so that dead horses can be included.

6. Reclassifying the dead horse as living-impaired.

7. Hiring outside contractors to ride the dead horse.

8. Harnessing several dead horses together to increase speed.

9. Providing additional funding and/or training to increase the dead horse's performance.

10. Doing a productivity study to see if lighter riders would improve the dead horse's performance.

11. Declaring that as the dead horse does not have to be fed, it is less costly, carries lower overhead and therefore contributes substantially more to the bottom line of the economy than do some other horses.

12. Rewriting the expected performance requirements for all horses.

And, of course...

13. Promoting the dead horse to a supervisory position.

Re: The Dead Horse Theory of Government

Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2012 11:40 pm
by DonnaT
Kyra wrote:The Dead Horse Theory of Government

The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says that "When you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount."

However, in government more advanced strategies are often employed, such as:

1. Buying a stronger whip.
Obviously not an option.

Everyone knows it does no good to beat a dead horse.

Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 12:23 am
by Kyra
!!!yes!!!

Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 8:16 am
by Absaroka
You left out writing new legislation banning the dead horse from using birth control....

Re: The Dead Horse Theory of Government

Posted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:48 pm
by Anthony Simon
Kyra wrote:The Dead Horse Theory of Government

The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from generation to generation, says that "When you discover that you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount."
Ah, but what happens when you haven't discovered it yet? No self-respecting dead horse - especially a political one - is going to let on it's dead. I mean there's all that free hay.