The Human Condition!
Posted: Wed May 03, 2006 10:24 pm
IDIOTS IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD:
>
>
>
> I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the
>local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer
>Crossing sign on our road.
>
> The reason:
>
> "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!
>
> I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."
>
> From Kingman, KS.
> ______________________________________________________
>
> IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE:
> My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
>
> He was a Chef?
> Yep...From Kansas City!
> ______________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee
>asked,!
>
> "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?
>
> To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?"
>
> He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
> Happened in Birmingham, Ala.
> _______________________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to cross the street.
>
> I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine.
>
> She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
>
> I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
>
> Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing
>driving?!"
>
> She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS
> ___________________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker.
>
> She was leaving the company due to "downsizing."
>
> Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often."
>
> Not another word was spoken.
>
> We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
>
> This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.
> ________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself
>and for the sake of her own life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
>
> A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office no less.
> ____________________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!"
>
> His reply, "I know - I already got that side."
>
> This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, Mississippi!
> _______________________________________________________
>
> STAY ALERT!
>
> They walk among us ... and they REPRODUCE
Hugs
Danielle Marie
>
>
>
> I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the
>local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer
>Crossing sign on our road.
>
> The reason:
>
> "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!
>
> I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."
>
> From Kingman, KS.
> ______________________________________________________
>
> IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE:
> My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.
>
> He was a Chef?
> Yep...From Kansas City!
> ______________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee
>asked,!
>
> "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?
>
> To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?"
>
> He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
> Happened in Birmingham, Ala.
> _______________________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to cross the street.
>
> I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine.
>
> She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
>
> I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
>
> Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing
>driving?!"
>
> She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS
> ___________________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker.
>
> She was leaving the company due to "downsizing."
>
> Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often."
>
> Not another word was spoken.
>
> We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.
>
> This was a bunch at Texas Instruments.
> ________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself
>and for the sake of her own life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
>
> A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office no less.
> ____________________________________________________
>
> IDIOT SIGHTING:
>
> When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!"
>
> His reply, "I know - I already got that side."
>
> This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, Mississippi!
> _______________________________________________________
>
> STAY ALERT!
>
> They walk among us ... and they REPRODUCE
Hugs
Danielle Marie
