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Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well, they decided to get married.

One broom was, of course, the bride broom, the other the groom broom.

The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress. The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo. The wedding was lovely.

After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride-broom leaned over and said to the groom-broom, "I think I am going to have a little whisk broom!!!"





"IMPOSSIBLE !!" said the groom broom.



Are you ready for this?
Brace yourself; this is going to hurt.

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"WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!"





Oh for goodness sake... laugh, or at least groan. Life's too short not to enjoy... even these silly little cute..... and clean jokes

(Sounds to me like she's been "sweeping" around!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! )

Two bananas are sitting on a riverbank and a turd comes floating by and says"Come on in fellows! The waters fine!"
One banana looks at the other and says"Do you believe that S---?"
Hugs


Love
Jeannie

> > http://www.cse.unsw.edu.au/~geoffo/humour/flattery.html

Oh dear Carolyn what can I say except, groan and groan and ha ha ha ha ha ha…….that’s funny


One day a little pig walks into a bar, gets a beer, drinks it then goes to the toilet, walks out the door and goes home.

A little while later another little pig walks into the bar, gets a beer, drinks it then goes to the toilet, walks out and goes home.

A little while later another little piggy walks into the bar, gets a beer, drinks it then goes to walk out the door.

The barman says, ”Hey little pig, aren’t you going to the toilet first like all the other pigs.

The little pig says,” No way, I’m that little piggy that goes wee, wee, wee all way home.”

I was afraid that was going to be the punch line!!!!

A koala is sitting up a gum tree ... smoking a joint









when a little lizard walks past and looks up and says,



















"Hey Koala ! What are you doing?"






The koala says:



"Smoking a joint, come up and have some."

So the little lizard climbs up and sits next to the koala and

they have a few joints. After a while the little lizard says his

mouth is 'dry' and is going to get a drink from the river. But

the little lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and

falls into the river.

A crocodile sees this and swims over to the little lizard and

helps him to the side, then asks the little lizard:

"What's the matter with you?"

The little lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting smoking a joint with the koala in the tree, got too stoned

and then fell into the river while taking a drink.

The crocodile says he has to check this out and walks into

the rain forest, finds the tree where the koala is sitting

finishing a joint, and he looks up and says "Hey you!"




So the koala looks down at him and sees the size of the croc expecting his lizard buddy, and says:



"WHOA!!!!!! dude, how much

water did you drink?!!"

A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering.

The officers drove along the street looking for the crowd, when all of a sudden they came across a group of people standing together.

The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let's get off the corner people."
A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again...
"I SAID, let's get off the street people... NOWWWWWW!"

Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction.

Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?"

Pretty good," chuckled his mate, you sure cleared that bus stop in a hurry.