I often wonder if ANYBODY ever knows how I feel. :(

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Marda
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Re: I often wonder if ANYBODY ever knows how I feel. :(

Post by Marda »

Lorna wrote:I basically try to maintain a somewhat upbeat attitude mainly for the purpose of whenever comedy shows come around
Here's a scenario for you Lorna ...

Yesterday I was in a major car dealership to talk with some people about a gig ... I couldn't help but notice the obvious predatory behaviour of the salescritters ...

the "salesroom" was elevated approx 5 feet above the lot level, the windows all tinted and shielded with roof overhang, and the interior was dimmed, much like an Air Traffic Control tower ...

the salescritters were obviously "on duty" ... their eyes were continuously darting around the 270 degree horizon covering all dealership entrances, all areas of all the carlot sections, and all service reception areas

there is no possible way a "carlooker" could have come within 100 yards of the dealership without being "lined up" by one of the "hunters" ...

of course, the really smooth salescritters will have all the moves down and it will seem to the "carlooker" that the "hunter" just happened to be nearby" when their eyes started to focus on a particular vehicle for more than approx 3 seconds (just enough for a quick intro comment) "Nice colour eh?", and a followup qualifying question "Do you like 4x4s?", leading to the first "close" attempt for the encounter "Are you buying a car today?" ... all of course which happens before the "carlooker" can turn around to see who his/her New "Best Friend" is ...
~

So I got to figuring, what if we borrow a few pages from The Wild Kingdom, and ER ... Thinking Outside The Box as it were ...

Imagine Car Dealership Sniper SharpShooters in a RoofTop Bunker ... armed with LaserScopedTranquilizer Guns ... as soon as a "carlooker" starts to focus on a particular unit ... it doesn't matter whether or not they're out of their own vehicle yet as long as a window is mostly open ... as long as the Sniper can get a clear shot to some human tissue ...

BANG ... the "carlooker" takes the hit and stops "deadlike'', paralyzed ... within split-seconds, an Emergency Response Team blankets the scene and the "carlooker" is immediately connected with life support systems and laid on a stretcher to be wheeled into a recovery room where "specialty teams" will start preparations for the "reawakening" of the happy, but teenie bit Groggy, "New Car Buyer" ...

Like magic, there's no real pain, and no difficult decisions for the "carlooker" to concern themselves with once they've made the first and most difficult decision to "look" at a new car ...
~
A good "standup" should get at least 1 giggle out of this scenario ... NO ???
:mrgreen:
/Marda
[-o<
~ Some drink at the fountain of knowledge - Others just gargle ~
Kersten Lee
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Post by Kersten Lee »

Hi Lorna,

I feel the hurts you have had deeply. I'm behind but I will read your good news next. I agree and can't add more to what has already been said.

Marda, I like the quote and believe it to be true.

I still wish the best for you, Lorna.

Kersten
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Lorna
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POINTLESSNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Post by Lorna »

I should change this thread to "I wonder if I'll ever be happy again"? Or i wonder if I'll ever WORK again"?

THE ANSWER IS A RESOUNDING "NO"!

I'm tired of feeling like a brighter tomorrow doesn't exist. But I guess I have to get used to that until my body is cold & 6 feet under, because that's just the way it is. TO HELL WITH IT ALL.

I was TOLD to start the damn job on a certain day - so can I start SUING now???

I have a college education - I am NOT a stupid person - I am NOT incapable - why the **** am I SO UNHIREABLE???????

Well, it looks like my future has already been written. For me, it's a life of welfare & robbing folks just to eat. And Lorna is over & done with, just as are the unemployment checks. I even tried to sell these damn magazines but even THAT blew up in my face.

I have decided to NOT go out on Halloween. And I just want my death to be quick & painless.

Oh, and please spare me the old "quit whining & do it" high-school-coach pep-talk style posts. Let's just accept the possibility that success is just NOT in the cards for everyone in this world, no matter how hard certain individuals may try. I will never work again, no matter how badly I want to, or how qualified for the job I know I am. There will always be some inexplicable force to rip it all away from me at the last minute. :?

The only CDing I'll ever get to do from now on will be as a BUM CDing as a BAGLADY. :?

I hate to end on this note, but let's get real - it's OVER for me, even though I feel like it barely begun. I have never known the pleasures of having a wife, or owning a house, but now I accept that I never will.
Last edited by Lorna on Fri Oct 22, 2004 11:54 pm, edited 5 times in total.
Live it. Love it. OWN IT.
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Jamie Ann
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We Stand Behind You

Post by Jamie Ann »

Well, Lorna, it is hard to know exactly what to say, but I hope you will keep trying. The Lorna that those of us on this forum deeply love certainly is a person that others should appreciate. We stand behind you 100%.
Take care,

Jamie Ann
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Post by Loretta Ann »

((G))
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Post by Beauty »

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Lorna
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Post by Lorna »

Thanks girls... I really need a miracle... and the next time something good appears on the horizon, I am just going to KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT. :?

I seem to JINX myself every single time I say "Everything's going to be all right..." As soon as I express how good things to come will be, the opposite happens. :? So please let's keep this in mind the next time I say that the future is going to be DARK... and COLD... and MISERABLE... psyching out the forces is only for my own good... [-o<
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