Crossdressers-Haven.com

Hi,

Back in 1997 my friend Derek and myself reached a crossroads in our lives. We were both very active in the TG/TV scene in Scotland. We both felt we had reached a point where we had to make a fundamental decision about our individual lives and our future gender.

At the 3G club in Aberdeen we had regular guest speakers and functions. On one such day we were treated (if that is the right word) to a presentation about gender reassignment surgery. One part of the presentation was a video of the operation itself.

This was a turning point, I was horrified by the video and felt physically sick; from that point onwards my interest wained to the level it is now where I spend most of the time helping other Tg/Tv's rather than indulging.

Derek on the other hand was enthralled and the result was 8 months later he became she, following a private operation in Amsterdam. I didn't react well to her chosen method and subsequent behavior, and rightly or wrong I distanced myself from her. I regretted this later.

If any are interested in what the surgery looks like then follow this link. These are stills, but I am certain they are the same as I saw back in 1997.
If you have a delicate constitution - do not follow the link.

http://www.bizarremag.com/mondo_bizarro.php?id=1426#

Tara

Kerri

Hi

I respect your view of course.
I think, however, I find most photographs, films etc. of operations more or less scary. I don't faint, but I don't like to see any either. The doctors do their work, and only if I were in the medical profession I would may be like to see it.

I mean, would watching an operation of the appendix make hinder from having it, if it's necessary? Of course that is an emergency situation, one might say. But, if one feels that something has to be done, one doesn't stop, or?

If you think of OPs done to improve looks (there must be an english term, which I don't know), which woman (or man) would like to see how the cutting etc. is done? The result is, what counts for those patients, and its already enough for them to see the bandages and bruises right after the OP.
I can't imagine that anybody wants to see a video before: "This is How They Do Your Bone Grinding", "Cutting in Your Breast Tissue" etc.
Donna Rose, a TS woman, writes in her biography ("wrapped in blue") that she was carefully informed of course by the surgeon about the procedures , but she avoided looking at the scary OP-tools when she was rolled into the OP-room to have her facial surgery. I'd do the same.

All that applies for me even, when it comes to SRS.

More mechanical: when my car needs an inspection or repair, I am not interested how they do it more than on a general explanatory level. I don't need and I am not interested in seeing how they carry it out.

Best

Xenia

Hi Xenia,

When you put it that way, I have to agree with you!

Maybe it was just as well that I was put off by it though, because it clearly was not the right route for me.

Maybe it will be of interest to somebody.

Kerri

I would have to agree with Xenia. the pictures are pretty brutal. I listened to a surgeon once describe the operation and show some sketchs. they were enough to turn me against ever wanting to go there But for some I guess it is the answer atleast in their minds to all their problems. I personally feel that they could live the life of a women and be full time with out ever getting the operation a la Virgina Prince.
I know this will probable start a discussion with the TSs that are on board here. But thats ok it is only my opinion and I won't try to convince them to change theirs. It is what ever works for each indiviual.... ..Sallee

Though personally I have no plan of ever having the operation, I do see why some have chosen to take the step in that direction. The way I see things for myself it is ok to add to what you have but it is something entirely different to take away from what you were given. But again that is my own feeling for myself. And as I said before I do understand why some would want to take the step. For one thing just living full time is not the same as actually going all the way. Because of the laws, at least in the US, a person that is just living full time does not have the right to have the legal documentation that says they are a woman and therefore they still have to be a male. Another thing is just simply the feelings that are delt with during the transition. The girls that I have talked to that went through the change said that they never felt comfortable with their bodies until they had gone through the process and that after the surgery they actually felt whole for the first time in their lives. Now, I do realize that not everyone feels the same because we are all different, and I do agree that for me living as I am is the best thing. Because as I see it I have the best of both worlds, but I tend to live in the middle where I am really neither male nor female. Sometimes I dress manly and sometimes more fem. But I always have no women's clothes no matter what time of day it happens to be. I have chosen to live more androgynous than at either end of the scale. So for me living full time would be easier than for some because most of the people that I know are use to the idea of seeing me the way I am without ever realizing that what I am wearing is more fem than masculine.

But, I also have to applaud those of us who take the step to live the way they feel is best for them because it takes a lot of courage to make that decision in the society that we live in today.

But, this is only my opinion and as everyone knows opiinions are like a**holes.

huggs
anna

I have a close realative (of sort) going threw the process. She is the first person I met and it is an intersting conversation I had with her. She currentaly has some problems with her work inverment as she is still told to use the male bathrooms even though it has been almost or over a year that she has been living her life as woman. The transition can seam very difficult it seams to me and I belive those who go threw with it (not to mention the huge cost) are extremly brave.