Another corner turned

Gillian · Post by **Gillian** » Mon Sep 26, 2011 11:31 am

There was a new corner turned this weekend. I have been really working at being more accepting of myself in the last year. This self acceptance thing is something that my wife has been noticing. I have been of the thought for a long time that I need to be more accepting of myself, so I could be more loving of others. As in, "love your neighbor, as yourself". This may seem obvious to you, but I was not loving others, because I was not loving and accepting of myself. Having gained inroads in this area, it has had some interesting impacts within my marriage. There has been more open love and affection than ever before. By example, I rarely said I love you to her in the past, and now she hears it daily. My wife has started to share some of her deep secrets and desires, possibly as a result of a more loving environment. Well she and I have had our compromises in regards to my CDing, and in one conversation this weekend, they were all wiped off the map. Her words were basicly, "who am I not to let you wear what you want, If I love and accept you and you love and accept me". "You can wear what ever, and it will not bother me any more". If she says this, then it is true, she does not use her words lightly. I never saw my journey of self acceptance having this kind of end result. All I wanted was to be able accept myself, to love others and accept them also. Now this love seems to be multipling back toward me, an unexpected result. Wow, it makes me want to cry because I love her so much more now.

Post by **DonnaT** » Mon Sep 26, 2011 11:41 am

Great news, Gillian.

Post by **KimberlyS** » Mon Sep 26, 2011 12:44 pm

Sounds like a great weekend in multiple ways.

Anne Bonny · Post by **Anne Bonny** » Mon Sep 26, 2011 4:50 pm

Congratulations. Self acceptance is important kind of liberating when it happens. I am glad you have your wife's acceptance - that is a blessing too.

Anita · Post by **Anita** » Mon Sep 26, 2011 9:25 pm

That brings tears to my eyes, Gillian. I think you're right, that it wouldn't have happened without acceptance and love for yourself, first.

Anthony Simon · Post by **Anthony Simon** » Tue Sep 27, 2011 5:06 am

That really is amazing. S'Wonderful.

Absaroka · Post by **Absaroka** » Tue Sep 27, 2011 7:40 am

Sounds great.

I personally have found the exact opposite to be true in terms of self acceptance. For me it is crucial that I accept others, and that makes self acceptance far easier. The moment I start being judgemental of others I am on a slippery and steep slope of judging myself as well.

Zari

Paula G · Post by **Paula G** » Tue Sep 27, 2011 8:30 am

That is excellent, I am so glad that this is working out so well for you. The good we do rebounds back to us.

Zari's comment just goes to highlight what a diverse bunch we, just like any one else! Personally I suspect that I accept and love myself a little too much at times.......

Gillian · Post by **Gillian** » Tue Sep 27, 2011 9:21 am

Part of the self acceptance has also been working on not judging others. Not accepting ones self is judging yourself to "some standard". As many of you know, I am a devote christian, it says, "judge not lest you be judged". That would include judging yourself harshly. I examine myself and find that I need to being loving. Coming from an abusive back ground I lived behind walls, nothing got in to hurt, but nothing got out also. What came first, the chicken, or the egg, the point is I had to love and accept myself which lead to other things. Whether you love and accept others first, or yourself first, the end result is that we all have to be loving and accepting in both directions.

Thank you for your kind comments.

Leeza · Post by **Leeza** » Tue Sep 27, 2011 10:04 am

Gillian, In reading your posts above it grought to mind another scripture"Give and it will be given back to you heaped up and running over."

Leeza

Erica S · Post by **Erica S** » Thu Sep 29, 2011 7:16 am

Gillian, That is awesome to hear! Good for you. I am glad to know it is working out for the good for both of you!

Hugs,

Erica