Ditto!
Virginia
A "Gift"??
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Anita
- Miss Diamond Goddess
- Posts: 3068
- Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2004 2:55 pm
- Location: Burlingame, CA (San Francisco Bay area)
Hi Tracy--
It caused me a great deal of pain when it surfaced at 49. I saw that it was going to change my life, whether I wanted it to or not. Once I accepted that I was going to come out to everyone, then the severe pain went away, and I begin to see the enormous rewards I could get from living both lives.
I was sinking into middle-age male depression, and it took something as extreme as this to head me away from it.
If I had been the world-shaker successful man that I fully intended to be, then TG would probably have taken a less radical form than it did as an older man. This is not to say that success makes CDing go away, or that CDers can't be successful--many of us are overachievers!
But for me, earlier success would have brought out some of "this" in adifferent form. My successful ventures now include my TG side--there's no unringing the bell. I don't have a problem with that, because I'm definitely more "whole" than I was as a younger man.
I have not lived with this all my life, and I got all my relationships out of the way before it appeared. When I see the ways other older men try to cope with depression, I consider myself lucky to have found a transgender self as my way out. I hope this puts it in perspective.
It caused me a great deal of pain when it surfaced at 49. I saw that it was going to change my life, whether I wanted it to or not. Once I accepted that I was going to come out to everyone, then the severe pain went away, and I begin to see the enormous rewards I could get from living both lives.
I was sinking into middle-age male depression, and it took something as extreme as this to head me away from it.
If I had been the world-shaker successful man that I fully intended to be, then TG would probably have taken a less radical form than it did as an older man. This is not to say that success makes CDing go away, or that CDers can't be successful--many of us are overachievers!
But for me, earlier success would have brought out some of "this" in adifferent form. My successful ventures now include my TG side--there's no unringing the bell. I don't have a problem with that, because I'm definitely more "whole" than I was as a younger man.
I have not lived with this all my life, and I got all my relationships out of the way before it appeared. When I see the ways other older men try to cope with depression, I consider myself lucky to have found a transgender self as my way out. I hope this puts it in perspective.
Last edited by Anita on Sat Apr 22, 2006 9:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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TracyQ
- Miss Sapphire Goddess
- Posts: 53
- Joined: Thu Mar 30, 2006 5:44 pm
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Paulie
- Miss Emerald Goddess
- Posts: 224
- Joined: Tue Jul 12, 2005 3:30 pm
- Location: Colorado
Guess I'll throw my .02 worth in here.
Gift.... curse... ????
Depends on your outlook. Ask some lotto winners about their "gift" of winning, some will say it's more of a curse.
I've looked at it as both at different times of my life, but of late, I have understood that this is a part of me... part of who I am. I try to balance that and enjoy both sides of myself.
I know CDing is not something I will "get over" or "outgrow", or worse even be "cured of". I accept this as part of me, and I enjoy this.
So... I guess in my rambling thoughts here... I don't see this as gift or curse.
Gift.... curse... ????
Depends on your outlook. Ask some lotto winners about their "gift" of winning, some will say it's more of a curse.
I've looked at it as both at different times of my life, but of late, I have understood that this is a part of me... part of who I am. I try to balance that and enjoy both sides of myself.
I know CDing is not something I will "get over" or "outgrow", or worse even be "cured of". I accept this as part of me, and I enjoy this.
So... I guess in my rambling thoughts here... I don't see this as gift or curse.