Can I still be hetro after this experience?
Posted: Thu Aug 27, 2009 11:52 am
Have other hetro CD's had "gay" experiences while cross dressed even though you are hetro. I have had experiences that may seem like fantasy to some but I swear this is true and want to share it and get opinions. I have one friend who knows I cross-dress. I had lots of contact with this person through sport, work and travel. He helped me through a rough time in my life and we bonded more strongly than most male friendships do. I can't remember exactly when we crossed the line but during drink fuelled intimate conversations he told me that he had an unrealised kink for spanking women over his knee. I confided in him that I fantasized about been a girl getting spanked while wearing frilly tennis knickers and we knew we were on common ground. It developed from there. The next time we travelled together to London on a project we found ourselves, without planning it, in the women’s section of a sports store buying a tennis outfit including ruffled panties for me. We went back to my hotel room via the pub for a couple of inhibition busting drinks and I changed into the outfit. This was the first time I had ever been seen by anyone dressed up. The atmosphere was very good and we talked and laughed a lot. Physically it felt ok between us because at the time I was in my mid 20s only 5'3" and 120lbs and he was in his mid 30s, 6ft tall and weighed about 190lbs. I think this was important. It made me feel more girly, vulnerable and submissive. I bent over, spun and jumped around so that my panties would show. Eventually he told me that I was a very naughty girl. He took me to a chair, put me over his knee, flipped up my skirt and gave me the first spanking I had received since I was a child. He didn't hold back either. I felt it for hours afterwards. Latter I swapped my skirt for jeans and kept on the panties and shirt and we went out to a pub. We had these sessions very regularly over the next few years. Sometimes more than once a week, especially after I bought my first house. It was on the way to the airport and he would overnight with me regularly. I was usually cross dressed while he was in the house and often he would request what he would like me to wear. He travelled much more than I and sometimes he would come back from trips with dresses and lingerie for me. The price I paid for these new clothes was to take many trips over his knee, sometimes even when I really didn't want to. But I never got tired of it and always looked forward to the next time. When we travelled together I would enjoy packing the female part of my luggage. Other times we would have to buy “emergency” clothing in the duty free. When we could we would share a twin room which meant I could remain dressed in his company for longer periods. I loved changing into female clothing without even having to say anything. It was expected that when we were in these situations I dressed as a girl. It was the norm.
There was never any sexual exchange during these sessions outside of slapping and patting my bottom. My panties only came down for spanking and never came off. We slept in different beds. The only other thing we did was massage. I usually was the masseuse and was always cross dressed while doing it. Because he was so much bigger I would straddle his lower back to do his shoulders and back and he would comment on how he could feel the ruffles on my panties or how he could feel the heat from my spanked fanny. If I was wearing a bra and falsies I would lean forward so that he would enjoy the feel of my boobies. Because we were scantily dressed on these occasions we could see each others state of arousal but never "went there". Usually he was fully dressed and I would be in a nighty, dress or skirt. We would often spend the entire evening in, with me cross dressed. I would change into a nighty for the last hour or so and these evenings always ended with me getting spanked and sent to bed. This went on for years and our extended mutual group of friends never knew about it. Most of the time we were not in relationships. When we were it would usually stop and resume when we ended up single again. It came to an end when he had to emigrate. We hardly saw each other for 10 years. Very recently I dressed in very ruffled panties and a female robe, that we had bought together years ago, while he overnighted in my house. But nothing happened, not even a remark. I asked him the next day if it had bothered him and he said "not at all" but he did not appear to want to go back to the good old days. He was over on serious business and perhaps this affected his mood. I would love it if he would get his interest back. We are both 15 years older now and perhaps this has changed how he feels. I am not as pretty as I used to be either but my bum has remained round and girly and we never did the makeup/face thing at all anyway.
Despite all this I still say that I am totally hetro. I have no interest in men and everything we did was just living out a fantasy. I feel very lucky that I was able to do it. I have read that hetro men in "all male" situations like prison or ships for example often compensate for the lack of female company and then revert to normal when released. I saw an old English solider been interviewed about his time in Colditz prison remarking that when they put on theatre performances in the prison the people who played female parts often let their hair grow and remained cross dressed following the performances for the rest of the war. He said it lifted their spirits (except his, he wasn’t bothered with that sort of thing, sure he could barely remember it 65 years later!) to have some femininity around the dreary place and even the Germans didn’t object. He said that this is not talked about now because people who were not there wouldn’t understand. I think all of us would totally understand.
I know that my community would say that what we did is gay but what do you girls think?
There was never any sexual exchange during these sessions outside of slapping and patting my bottom. My panties only came down for spanking and never came off. We slept in different beds. The only other thing we did was massage. I usually was the masseuse and was always cross dressed while doing it. Because he was so much bigger I would straddle his lower back to do his shoulders and back and he would comment on how he could feel the ruffles on my panties or how he could feel the heat from my spanked fanny. If I was wearing a bra and falsies I would lean forward so that he would enjoy the feel of my boobies. Because we were scantily dressed on these occasions we could see each others state of arousal but never "went there". Usually he was fully dressed and I would be in a nighty, dress or skirt. We would often spend the entire evening in, with me cross dressed. I would change into a nighty for the last hour or so and these evenings always ended with me getting spanked and sent to bed. This went on for years and our extended mutual group of friends never knew about it. Most of the time we were not in relationships. When we were it would usually stop and resume when we ended up single again. It came to an end when he had to emigrate. We hardly saw each other for 10 years. Very recently I dressed in very ruffled panties and a female robe, that we had bought together years ago, while he overnighted in my house. But nothing happened, not even a remark. I asked him the next day if it had bothered him and he said "not at all" but he did not appear to want to go back to the good old days. He was over on serious business and perhaps this affected his mood. I would love it if he would get his interest back. We are both 15 years older now and perhaps this has changed how he feels. I am not as pretty as I used to be either but my bum has remained round and girly and we never did the makeup/face thing at all anyway.
Despite all this I still say that I am totally hetro. I have no interest in men and everything we did was just living out a fantasy. I feel very lucky that I was able to do it. I have read that hetro men in "all male" situations like prison or ships for example often compensate for the lack of female company and then revert to normal when released. I saw an old English solider been interviewed about his time in Colditz prison remarking that when they put on theatre performances in the prison the people who played female parts often let their hair grow and remained cross dressed following the performances for the rest of the war. He said it lifted their spirits (except his, he wasn’t bothered with that sort of thing, sure he could barely remember it 65 years later!) to have some femininity around the dreary place and even the Germans didn’t object. He said that this is not talked about now because people who were not there wouldn’t understand. I think all of us would totally understand.
I know that my community would say that what we did is gay but what do you girls think?
