Had a bad weekend have not dressed in over a week..

[Saul]

Hello girls I am back, sorry been gone so long.
I went out 2 weeks ago and ran into an a hole. The club in Denver was great in fact the bar thought
I was a performer and the responses I got was unbelievable, most did not believe I
Just started dressing. But I ran into a guy who was very rude to everyone in the bar who was
Acting like he hated straights, bi, gay and tag who decided to fall head over heals with me.
Well I turned my back and he was going through my leather, when I confronted he began to deny
It but then turned and said so what if I am what r u going to do about it.
Usually it takes allot to push my buttons but since this was basicly my first full night out in drag I
Called the gentleman out on it and even warned him that it would not be a good idea and that
He would feel real stupid having someone in drag hand him an a kicking.
But to skip what happen the bar let me back in while they would not let him back in and I was applauded
for helping the guy for making his next visit to the den test that match sooner
I was elated at first to find a place that was not only interested in the transgender community
but took the extra step and will go up to bat for them as well. But I was sadden that I was confronted like that
and had to hurt someone.
Was I wrong for beating the guy up? I did not want him to go further in his games and I did not like how he was treating
everyone, but given my mindless uncaring past that was based on hurting others I do not want my dressing to lead
back on that path.
Was this just a one time this out does this happen allot?
Bio* I am a very passable dresser in Denver colorado, 37 Latino missed.

[Davita]

The only wrong part that I see is having a possible enemy and if he's such a jerk, what will the idiot do next? It might have been better had someone called the cops to come visit the establishment. I don't know if places have bouncers anymore.

Hey, need a job? Maybe you can be a bouncer? Then when you take care of idiots, you are doing it for money and simply being a representative of the owner's policies. You, in theory, shouldn't be singled out as you toss the bad folk as you spew policy on them. Just a thought....

[Anthony Simon]

I never been out dressed up, so I can't comment out the specifics. But there are many, many people out there who try to make themselves feel better by trying to make you feel worse. That may involve actually beating you up or just threatening to do so so they can see your fear (they like that).

If you're not actually afraid of getting beaten up, the trick is to convey that without having to do much. So, if it were happen again, you could just describe what you did to the last guy who tried it - and make sure you're calm and they understand that you're telling the truth.

I'm myself not physically strong, but if I give a really long, hard, unflinching look, people will rethink. But that may be just me.

[DonnaT]

If the bar had no bouncers, or no one in charge to remove him from the bar, then, if, and only if he wouldn't leave you alone, you did what you had to do.

Note that you could have ended up in jail dressed up. So violence should always be a last resort.

[Carolynn]

I do not understand why people who want to dress and go out want to go to a bar or club. That is putting a person in the way of idiots and inviting trouble. There are other things to do: find friends and go shopping, to a concert, a play, anywhere but a bar inhabited by drunken idiots. Jeeeeze!!! Use your head people, the one on top of your shoulders, not the one in your pants!! Jeeeze Louise!

Carolynn

[JoAnnDallas]

I was at a Holiday En Fem convention one year and a few of us decided to visit the bar for a beer. When you at a TG convention the whole Hotel knows who you are. LOL Anyway this male person in the bar started making loud comments about us. We ignored him but then he started over to where we were sitting. All of a sudden the female bartender came around the bar and got between him and us. She then warned him to leave us alone because we were Hotel guest. He got mad at her and she came out with a baseball bat that I never even seen her caring. She told him to leave and that made him even more mad. All of a sudden the bouncer that none of us had seen had him by the collar and frog marched him to the entrance and made sure that he did not come back in. The female bartender then apologized to us about the man and said the beer in on the house.

JoAnn

[Ralitsa]

That's a great story JoAnn

It seems to me that even when people are not completely supportive of our fashion choices, most of them are completely intolerant of people who act like jerks. I've only been in a few "less than friendly" situations, and fortunately none of them became violent as public sympathy seemed to be on my side.