Crossdressers-Haven.com

I suppose everyone in the world wishes at some point in their life that they were young, and hot and had nice boobs. And then we look in the mirror and see that we have a lot of work to do and not much to work with. And then we get over it and decide to find out what works for us.
I was down at my neighborhod establishement a few days ago having lunch, and the wife of the owner, who is always interested to see what I'm wearing, sort of admonished me for my dress being rather too short. After a bit a friend of mine stopped by and she agreed that my dress was really too short. I did suspect as much when I put it on but the day was hot and I wanted something easy and casual, but really this dress was more appropriate for a teenager than an old ??? like myself.
So of course after lunch I did go and change into a longer skirt and conservative top, and this was approved of by all. So I won't be wearing that short dress in public again, maybe just around the house or yard.
The style I really like, and would want to be able to achieve, is the sort of mature and sophisticated, classy and elegant look. This one takes a lot of money I guess, but even when I spend a few hundred on an outfit I don't really get it right. I'm guessing that style and elegance has as much to do with how you wear it as what you're wearing. I notice that very few women can really achieve the classy and elegant look, and I suppose that's why I admire the elegant women so much, because they are rare.
The Bulgarian peasant chic I can do well, and it is a good everyday look for me. It's comfortable and casual without being vulgar, so I like to think. The difficult thing though is getting consistent advice. Every woman I talk to has a different suggestion about what I should change, so I think that there is no correct answer.
Anyway what I want to wear depends a lot on the mood I'm in, and the weather, and where I'm going, so it varies anyway. I'm going to buy some more shoes this weekend though, because I'm in Bulgaria and we have a 4 day weekend and I'll be going through Plovdiv. They make the nicest shoes there for really good prices. I need a few pair of ankle boots, at least one brown pair and I'd like to get another color, maybe cream or something like that. And it would be good if I could pick up some strappy sandals on clearance, since it's getting in to fall, and of course I can always use another pair of heels, or 2 or 3.
And if I happen to find a really cute peasant outfit I will get that too, and wear it to the Renaissance Fair when I'm back in the US.

I think we all fall prey to the too short skirt at times, I blush to think of some I have tried, even worn outside I wonder if this is just inexperience, after all most of are only occasional dressers, I manage maybe 12 -15 days a year so at that rate Paula is still a teenager and we all know how some of them dress.

I agree with your comments about elegance, I think that is what I seek a lot of the time, but between my taste for the inappropriately high hem line and lack of budget I so often fail. Still it's fun trying.

I for one wear my skirts or dresses cut around the knee, don't need any extra eye's eyeing up and old lady in a short skirt

I am really enjoying Charles Ander's book The Lazy Crossdresser - If I keep saying that you will all begin to believe I am spamming the site! But not so! I am finally able to log hours as a woman around the house, and my decision to do this is paying off because I am sensing a change in me, I am wearing make-up daily, putting my look together, and becoming comfortable with who I am. I am finding a new sense of normal. The lazy CD book is also helping me - Many women are built just like me, with a few rather major differences. I have always tried to find comfortable chothing, yet clothing that is elegant and feminine typical of women my age and size who I see around me. My skirts and dresses range from just above the knee to mid calf. I have skirts and tops, even dresses that are casual but which with the proper accesories can be tweeked in a dressier direction. Looking in the mirror I have to decide does this look good, does this match? And If I don't like it or it doesn't work for me I try something else. I have a few klunkers in my wardrobe but I really have been rather good at selecting clothing that fits and that achives the style I am happy with. I have nothing that could be classified as hooker, or sex fetishist, and I have no outfits which would be considered high fashion. I go for a casual every day look that is comfortable, or that would be considered business casual. I suppose its what we see in the fliers that come in the sunday paper. I am a man but I have the right to be in touch with my femininity, Anne has a right to be who she is I suppose I am a hybrid in many ways I can be a man, I can be a woman, or I can be inbetween though I can never be a genetic female in anyway when I say I can be a woman - I am a woman as much as it is possible for a person of varied gender to be sans permanent surgery and hormones which would still never make me a woman - our brains are just too different - though perhaps we have a transgendered brain to some extent....hum....

Ralitsa,

You girl you, dressing for your mood, the circumstances, the weather, etc. No correct answer to the changes the others would make of you? Yep. The correct style is what you want and can carry off. Otherwise, it's what you can carry off. Don't want to be a leggy whore? Okay then match up things that provide the modesty you want. Got good legs, but are a bit older shall we say? Then you can sneak on a bit shorter than your usual skirt or dress. Try a slit that you can cover up with a hand when you sit.

You have to be comfortable no matter what you wear. Being comfy also helps the confidence to "pull off the look" you decide on -- pull off your style. I don't know if you have sen my Flickr pics, but I have a range of looks from frumpy (yuck) to fairly decent (I think). My style? Average soon to retire lady with a fun streak.

Anyway, take all the advice you have been given, sort out the sources to the ones you trust and see if they come up with similar recommendations. Those are the ones to listen to.All the other changes are what you feel are good to make and you can be confident with.

I can't even get consistent advice on what look to try to achieve as a guy. So attempting this as a woman would be far more complex I think. I know my wife considers "outfit selection", which she does the night before on days she works, to be a chore. She'd tell you that the ability to wear the same white shirt, tie and pants all week is a truly enviable luxury that men don't appreciate.

For myself, I like to dress the way I feel inside, both male and female. Often this means very casual in either gender. In male mode this means I get accused sometimes of being a slob. In female mode it can mean a lot more, but since I'm not out no one comments.

The ability to (at least sort of) wear what you want is another aspect of male privilege, the loss of which we bemoan when we don female attire.

I like skirts. Aside from that, if I was a woman I'd probably dress a lot like my wife does. Artsy professional at work, clothes you work in the garden in at home.

Zari

Outfit selection is a chore, Zari. I never pick out what I will wear the night before because I will change my mind by morning. I use to tease my oldest daughter because she would change clothes 3 or 4 times in the morning between the point where she got out of bed and when she left for school. But I understand the problem perfectly now.
Today I just went with easy, I have on a grey wool skirt and lavender knit top. The weather is cooling off the last few days, and we have a 4 day weekend so I wanted something comfortable and warm enough. It's not very stylish, just a basic simple outfit. And that's what I like about dressing all the time, is that I can wear a simple basic outfit sometimes without feeling like I'm missing an opportunity to get all glammed up.
Packing for a trip is even a bigger chore. Then you have to try to decide days in advance what you will want to wear, and remember to get the right shoes for each outfit, and take a few extra things just in case, and try to get everything to fit in the suitcase. Oh, and don't forget to bring the right jewelry too.

My guitar partner has nice legs, and usually wears her skirts maybe a touch above the knee, at their shortest. So when she said she was going to wear a shorter skirt to play out one night, and she wanted an opinion, I figured I'd be able to sign off on it easily.

I'm with Davita--good legs? A little older? You can get away with it.

But Fran came out, and it just didn't look good at all! Not sexy--just--off somehow. She's blind, so she couldn't see my face. But she sensed the lack of enthusiasm, and did not argue at all when I said it was better not to do it.

I told her to check it out with her gal friends, too, and see what they might say. I think I'd be seconded, though. Such a shame! I thought I was going to validate her doing a little "teeny-bopping" on stage. It wasn't to be.

Ralits she has to be out of the door and on her way to work by 6 am. Hence the night before selection.

In the days when I had to attend an office - often somebody else's - I would have to make sartorial choices of what to wear. Yes in the environment I worked in a suit was expected, but within that stricture I had grey suits, blue suits, check suits, striped suits, single breasted, double breasted, two piece three piece, and that's before we start to think about shirts, ties, shoes etc. Normally the choice was in part driven by what shirts were clean and ironed, but none the less a selection was required.

Now I work in a different field (well garden really) the choice is driven by the weather, how many layers are needed. I have a work "look" that I think is professional and practical, just short of uniform. My piint is that we all have to make an outfit selection each time we get dressed, it's just that some selections are more fun than others.

Very true Paula

I'd say outfit selection based on weather is a lot more fun than based on what the boss will think.

Zari