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found out

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 12:04 am
by Kandy
Let me start over at the beginning. will probably blunder through it but here goes. In the 80tys when I first met my now wife, after a few months I finaly told her That I liked wearing panties she some what was shocked but she did go out and buy me some. a few mo. later I ordered some other articles of under garmets,garter hose and panties to match. After a while she still didnt care for them but took some pics. we then drove tractorand trailer for 7 years me still wearing panties.I had been a truck driver for 16 years prier to our meet. didnt even have thoughts of wearing womens clothing at that time of my life.About 2 mo. ago the wife went to Hawhii for a month that is when I guess I went hog wild buying a wig braand an outfit blouseand skirt. came home and put them on, then I found some lipstick earrings and put them on then I had to laugh I had a full beard. So I shaved it off then took some self pics. Then the wife came home I put it all away and forgot about them. I then went to a reunion for a week and came home to a crying wife mad and up set woman. I asked WHAT WAS WRONG then she let me have it ARE YOU GAY DO YOU WANT TO BE A WOMAN,WHAT ARE THOSE PICS SUPOSTE TO BE AND THOSE CLOSE? left me stumbeling for words. I told her I would get some help some where. I have a friend who is a minister so I went to him an to my surprise he had some answers for me It sure was hard to tell him what I was into but after I finaly told him he gave me some web sites to read and told me to let my wife read them also. so here I am totaly confused as to where to go from here.I even found this site and I like it very mutch.Ieven set up a page for the wife to come in and chat or what ever. I need some serious advise :? [-o< :? Kandy She doesnt even know what my name is in here.still scared :oops:

my own reply

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 12:09 am
by Kandy
And yes Ladys I do like myself dressed.I am so relaxed and care free.
KANDY

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 1:41 am
by Loretta Ann
Well Kandy,

Looks like you are headed into a new chapter of your life, My heart hurts for those of us who end up in these kinds of situations, the price one often pays for keeping secrets.

Having said that, you did not state what kind of web sites the pastor recommended? If it was ones like this one, you might have a easier chance of getting your wife to join the SO section here, in order for her to get an understanding of what we are all about.

Try not to push her? She will have a lot to process, answer her questions as honestly as you can, and try to give her the space she needs. Do not promise her you will never cross-dress again, and Good luck our friend.

Here is a link that might be helpfull.
http://www.rural-america.net/sopage/

I am sure others will be along shortly with more advice.

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 6:23 am
by Beauty
Morning Kandy,

I'm sorry to hear that your wife didn't take finding those things so well. :(

What else has happened since then with her reactions towards you? How long ago did this happen?

There are lots of things you can buy yourself. Giving your wife the link to this site is a GREAT idea!!!! =D> Girl Talk Magazine is a GREAT magazine to show your wife. It's a very classy TG'd magazine that looks like Vogue for Cosmopolitan for CD'rs.

The best advice I can give is to be patient and follow up with her whenever you think she's open to listening or if she's talking, then listen like you've never listened before. She's going to need you big time now.

Because you weren't able to be honest with her, her trust in you will be forever damaged. :? I'm sad that it happened this way, but at least there aren't any lies anymore.

The pastor. :? Is he being understanding or is he telling you to stop?

Sorry for all the questions. We're here for you. This kind of situation is one of the reasons this board is so important!
(--)
Beauty

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 11:39 pm
by Kandy
Beauty wrote:Morning Kandy,

I'm sorry to hear that your wife didn't take finding those things so well. :(

What else has happened since then with her reactions towards you? How long ago did this happen?(A month ago.)

There are lots of things you can buy yourself. Giving your wife the link to this site is a GREAT idea!!!! =D> Girl Talk Magazine is a GREAT magazine to show your wife. It's a very classy TG'd magazine that looks like Vogue for Cosmopolitan for CD'rs.

The best advice I can give is to be patient and follow up with her whenever you think she's open to listening or if she's talking, then listen like you've never listened before. She's going to need you big time now.

Because you weren't able to be honest with her, her trust in you will be forever damaged. :? I'm sad that it happened this way, but at least there aren't any lies anymore.

The pastor. :? Is he being understanding or is he telling you to stop?

Sorry for all the questions. We're here for you. This kind of situation is one of the reasons this board is so important!
(--)
Beauty
the pastor was very understanding ,and no he didnt tell me to stop.

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 12:01 am
by Beauty
Awesome!!!!!!!!!

:) :mrgreen: :)

Beauty

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 6:39 am
by Virginia
Kandy,
I fyou have read some of the other posts, some of our sisters are in the same boat, "getting caught." Its tough, but like my sisters have said, take it slow, don't force the issue and respect her wishes. If she does not want to discussit, don't! If she begins asking questions, answer them honestly and to the best of your ability. If you have not read, "Jung's Anima Theory and How it Relates to Crossdressing." this may give you some insight.
http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepage ... /anima.htm
If your So gets to the point where she is interested in learning more, have her come to this site. I know the SO's here would love to visit with her.
Good luck and God Bless.
Love,
Deborah

found out

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 12:47 am
by Kandy
Well I guess I am having a bad day my wife told me she doesnt want to think about it. She wount even check out this site or any others.says she cant deal with me crossdressing. ***huh*** ](*,) but I am happy with who I am. ***()***

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 4:05 pm
by Merinda
If your wife wont enter the web try printing off an information sheet from one of the sites and leave it lying around when your out .
She wont be able to resist the temptation , there is a good one called coping with crossdressing .

Empathy

Posted: Mon Jun 07, 2004 11:08 am
by DanielleCD
I feel for you on this one. My wife get this pale I'm sick look anytime the discussion comes up. :shock: I've cool my jets for bit becasue being a bit impulsive I could over do it. I think as time goes along she will become more understanding. The shrek movie has actually opened up some small discussions, so that was a help.

Anyway good luck.
Danielle :)