What is passable?
I thought I'd be the first to venture into this (largely) uncharted territory with a few thoughts. Please add your own or comment on mine. Tear them down, even.
That's what they're for...1. Passable can be defined as dressing like a GG of the same age/broad ethnic background who is doing roughly the same thing you are. Dressing like a real woman, in other words.
2. Many CDs have made the comment that far too many GGs dress like slobs most of the time. The women who dress like that make comments like "I hate getting dressed up"--they don't want to be overdressed, they don't want to attract the wrong kind of attention, and so on.
3. But my mother taught me that it's possible to look nice without looking overdressed or attracting the wrong kind of attention. Even when she was in her 80s, she looked nice. The colors she wore went together, the clothes fit right, and she looked comfortable and relaxed in them.
4. What almost no one wants is to be ridiculed or yelled at in public. Most crossdressers don't want someone screaming "THAT'S A GUY IN A DRESS!" And I don't think anyone, GG or CD, wants some jerk to point at them and yell "UGG-LEEEEEEEE!!"
5. Passability is largely attitude. If a person acts like they belong there--purposeful, poised, and confident--no one DARES ridicule or laugh. Their family or friends are going to find THEM embarrassing if they do!
5. A lot of crossdressers confuse passable with attractive. We assume that if a crossdresser is attractive, she must be passable. It's simply not true. Many GGs are not attractive. But they're all passable. Passable is, in fact, more complex a concept to define than attractive. Here's an example...
High heels are attractive. So are short skirts. Men ARE more attracted to women in high heels and short skirts. But if you're over about 35, unless you are dressed for cocktails and dinner (and maybe dancing) the combination is not passable for most of us. Because women over 35 just don't wear them together for anything else. It's just too sexy, I guess.
A lot of crossdressers oversimplify this rule, and it's a shame. They never wear short skirts. There are whole support groups that teach that! Meanwhile, there are GGs their age in short skirts all around them, at least in the summer time.
6. What's passable keeps changing. It changes with the weather, the day of the week, and with holidays. Here's an example. Now is the week before halloween. If you want to wear something a little wild, say fishnets, this is a great time. But watch what will happen the week after halloween--it's going to look like gothic just went COMPLETELY out of fashion! And it will come back two weeks later, but it will not be as big as it is this week.
6. The only real way to know what's passable is to watch women your age, and women who appear a few years younger, and look at the pictures in a fashion magazine every month. Don't take the fashion mags too seriously of course. But they can give you a clue as to the new trends. And fashion does allow us to wear things that otherwise we couldn't get away with.
So my fuller answer is--I try to dress appropriately, I try to look good, I try to be within the realm of passable, and sometimes I like to have a little fun.
