First time out for Steffie
Posted: Sun Aug 07, 2005 2:34 am
Hi girls,
Well I finally did it! I walked the tightrope: I went out en-femme starting in the daylight and ending in night time. There was a safety net under me though: I went out to a Renaissance meeting. Most were hetero CDers like me. My wife also went with me. We did have a place to change and then had a short drive to the meeting. This was thus my first time out in broad daylight which was kind of neat. I'm happy to report I didn't see anyone making fun of me on our short drive from where I changed. The meeting place was also secluded and I did some walking (in high heels) on the grounds. I always loved the sound of high heels (click click click on the pavement and now they were mine!
Oh yea and one more thing: and my wife earlier in the day brought me to a salon and had my eyebrows threaded (kind of like plucking but with thread). It did hurt some but at least my eyebrows weren't as bushy.
I'll admit I was very nervous in preparation for this day. The people there were all very nice to me and my wife, however. My wife was more nervous than I was (I was hoping she could calm ME down but couldn't as she was more nervous than I). She is accepting of my crossdressing but like with most wives, there are peaks and valleys. By talking to some of the CDers and some of the SO's there, I think she is not as nervous now. My wife is the type that will say everything is fine but sometimes she holds things inside. A perfect example is today in the morning she confessed her fear is that some CDers will eventually want to become women (i.e. sex change); she says she has been seeing some shows on TV like this lately and she was wondering if this were an omen. I told her there is a 0% chance of that happening to me. If someone else wants a sex change, I respect that just like I respect CDers (and all people for that matter) but I know this will never be me. If someone else wants to do it, I say fine as long as they're happy but I'm just a hetero Cder. After talking with some of the people at the meeting, though, I think she finally believes me. She even said she wants to go to the next meeting for TRI-ESS. Hopefully this will be the case with her next month. She did tell me the important thing is that I am happy and comfortable with myself and I guess that is true. I had a great time and made some great friends. It's nice to finally meet some CD's face-to-face and see they are nice (as are the people on this forum in cyberspace).
I guess you can say in some ways today was the beginning of my new journey. I'm very happy right now but will try and keep both feet firmly on the ground: for now I'll just keep going to meetings and then later maybe try and go out on a group outing (away from the safety net of the meeting hall). I don't know when this will be but I guess I should take it slowly. I should also continue to try and be patient with my wife'sadjusting. Along the way on this journey, I hopefully will continue to learn more about Steffie (me). I know that at heart I will always be male (most of the time) but that doesn't mean that my heart can't change to female for a little while each month (if that makes any sense?). The male part of me is competitive (not athletic but in other tasks like my career I strive for near perfection) and also hard-working but the female side is soft and takes time to "smell the roses." Can these 2 ever be integrated? I guess only time will tell. Hopefully there will be no real low valleys in my journey (there's bound to be some but hopefully not too low). I jus hope my wife never grows tired of Steffie.
Sorry if this post was a bit long but thanks for reading. I just wanted to share with you all. Take care.
Steffie
Well I finally did it! I walked the tightrope: I went out en-femme starting in the daylight and ending in night time. There was a safety net under me though: I went out to a Renaissance meeting. Most were hetero CDers like me. My wife also went with me. We did have a place to change and then had a short drive to the meeting. This was thus my first time out in broad daylight which was kind of neat. I'm happy to report I didn't see anyone making fun of me on our short drive from where I changed. The meeting place was also secluded and I did some walking (in high heels) on the grounds. I always loved the sound of high heels (click click click on the pavement and now they were mine!
Oh yea and one more thing: and my wife earlier in the day brought me to a salon and had my eyebrows threaded (kind of like plucking but with thread). It did hurt some but at least my eyebrows weren't as bushy.I'll admit I was very nervous in preparation for this day. The people there were all very nice to me and my wife, however. My wife was more nervous than I was (I was hoping she could calm ME down but couldn't as she was more nervous than I). She is accepting of my crossdressing but like with most wives, there are peaks and valleys. By talking to some of the CDers and some of the SO's there, I think she is not as nervous now. My wife is the type that will say everything is fine but sometimes she holds things inside. A perfect example is today in the morning she confessed her fear is that some CDers will eventually want to become women (i.e. sex change); she says she has been seeing some shows on TV like this lately and she was wondering if this were an omen. I told her there is a 0% chance of that happening to me. If someone else wants a sex change, I respect that just like I respect CDers (and all people for that matter) but I know this will never be me. If someone else wants to do it, I say fine as long as they're happy but I'm just a hetero Cder. After talking with some of the people at the meeting, though, I think she finally believes me. She even said she wants to go to the next meeting for TRI-ESS. Hopefully this will be the case with her next month. She did tell me the important thing is that I am happy and comfortable with myself and I guess that is true. I had a great time and made some great friends. It's nice to finally meet some CD's face-to-face and see they are nice (as are the people on this forum in cyberspace).
I guess you can say in some ways today was the beginning of my new journey. I'm very happy right now but will try and keep both feet firmly on the ground: for now I'll just keep going to meetings and then later maybe try and go out on a group outing (away from the safety net of the meeting hall). I don't know when this will be but I guess I should take it slowly. I should also continue to try and be patient with my wife'sadjusting. Along the way on this journey, I hopefully will continue to learn more about Steffie (me). I know that at heart I will always be male (most of the time) but that doesn't mean that my heart can't change to female for a little while each month (if that makes any sense?). The male part of me is competitive (not athletic but in other tasks like my career I strive for near perfection) and also hard-working but the female side is soft and takes time to "smell the roses." Can these 2 ever be integrated? I guess only time will tell. Hopefully there will be no real low valleys in my journey (there's bound to be some but hopefully not too low). I jus hope my wife never grows tired of Steffie.
Sorry if this post was a bit long but thanks for reading. I just wanted to share with you all. Take care.
Steffie
for going out and taking your wife with you to a meeting. I will never forget our first Tri-Ess meeting, my wife like yours was scared to death not knowing what to except. I think why was we were out in public for the first time walking the streets of a strange town, not to worry as we were with two other couples. What a night I will never forget 
Carol Ann
