due to my stroke (the "body"/spaceship, that Marda uses ... Marda's "host" is a middle aged, Canadian guy, who also had a heavy stroke 6 years ago ...I was "feeling" quite unhappy ... of course, the medical industry workers such as "doctors" have "hijacked" the "human condition" so badly, (imho)that any of us never mind "stroke survivors" are lucky to ever have a chance to "actually LIVE A LIFE"ONE OF MY CLOSEST MEDICAL INDUSTRY ADVISORS (MENTAL HEALTH CASE MANAGER ) asked me one day "how I was doing? ... my reply was "never mind the "hemiplegia" lh paralysis ... "what hurts, IS, I've lost my self-identity = (Marda) [he never "knew" anything about Marda], it wasn't just that I had to throw away my duds ... It was that I couldn't "find" Marda anywhere in the hospitals or wheelchair busses, I even found a galpal in the hospital, female, stroke survivor ( a real sweetie
), but It really "felt" as though Marda had expired 
leaving "ME", ... AN EMPTY "SPACESHIP" ... flying through EARTHSPACE all alone ... one day, an old musician buddy came by to visit ... actually, many times, but, one day, he brought a book ... "CARE OF THE SOUL" .. by THOMAS MOORE .. check it out ladies 
WARNING ... do not confuse "soul " with "religion" 
mostly, the medical industry ... has no clue or honesty enoough to admit that in the name of "caring" for "humans" with maladies" they actually only screw with our minds and bodies in much the same way as the more hard/physical industries ... "learn" or "develop" their "technologies" by medievalstyle methods of "destruction testing" 
... much the way the auto industry uses "crash test dummies" to analyze "how to kill humans and planets with automobiles" and "related technologies" ... the big " ... QUESTION" here then starts to become, something like this ... " are we quite fedup with being treated like "crash test dummies" by the "medical industries" 
How about this for a concept ... When I was a youngster, my Mom told me that everybody thought that I was going to be twins or maybe even "just agirl"
... my "other" would have been named "Heather" ... suppose for a moment, that "sometime during my Mom's pregnancy with me , "Heather" whether or not my fraternal twin sister, or my "alternate" spaceship 
took her departure from this realm and went away into "GOD'S SPACE" ??? sO, THIS MANY YEARS LATER, MARDA COMES ALIVE and finds new friends here to help her live through this time here on EARTH ... so, Am I (spaceship) the "other half "of my Mom's pregnancy, which resulted in a fine ,intelligent, and handsome boy/man who loves to "celebrate" the "woman in me", or, Am I what's left of "Heather" who went away to be with GOD sometime back about 1949/50? and whom GOD has given back to EARTH to become the "best stroke survivor" that "he/I" can become " in the service of "humanity" Or, AM I REALLY MARDA??? 
All I CAN TELL YOU NOW IS, "mARDA" FEELS great to be "back" 
Love/Marda
