Coping

[Bridget]

Well where to start ? Sometimes all I can think about is the next time I will be able to dress and spend some time as Bridget. I admit lately I am a little obsessed with my next outing , and I wish my SO would talk to me about it .But it is my obsession and I can't expect her to love it like I do. At least she is accepting and willing to go out with Bridget occasionally. It is usually around this time of year that I will start buying new clothes , makeup ,shoes etc. And for the next few months it will be all I can do to focus on my life in drab. I would like to live a week as Bridget in a safe place where I would only see people who are OK with a 6'3" (with my heels) guy with makeup and a dress on. Someday maybe but time marches on. I love my life except for the fact that I can not be Bridget as often as I want. Well anyway for the next week or so I will be planning my outfit, shoes and what look I will go for with my makeup until I am actually in Ptown going out to eat, stopping for coffee and maybe some late night dancing as Bridget.

Love and Hugs to all , Bridget

[Anne Bonny]

I think we are the ones who hold the keys to our own jail, or deep dark closet. When you start widening the circle of people who know, and increase your ability to dress in your own home without fear, and perhaps even begin to step out the door...then you will begin to rid yourself of the angst and the stress. You need to dress however you please whenever you please especially in your own home. I do not think it is healthy to live with the stress of wanting to but not being able to, if you want to you need to do it, eventually it will all calm down and you will begin to feel normal, however you are dressed and there will be little stress going back and forth. Rid yourself completely of deprivation and angst stress is not a good thing, if you are feeling this way then you definitely need dress time until that is no longer there.

[April Rose]

Anne, I think this is true. I have found, over time, the more people I can share my secret with, and in particular, the closer they are to me, the less anxiety I feel. I haven't felt the need to go out, because I can express myself at home, with people who care about me. If I ever do go out, it won't be by myself. I'll have someone with me for support, or I won't go.

[Bridget]

I find myself wanting to tell friends that will be understanding, I have a couple of friends that know and that I have spent time with them as Bridget.One of the things I liked to do before I took the step to go out, was to just sit at home and have dinner or a glass of wine and talk.Just that small sense of normalcy was wonderful.I'm not sure if my kids would ever understand, also not sure I would want them to know.I will keep moving forward with the hope of being myself as much as possible.
Thanks for listening
Bridget

[Anne Bonny]

Good luck to you...I have learned that this is who I am, I have days when I believe I can be a normal man Perhaps that is "blue fog" as opposed to "pink fog" when we move out of the fog we find thoughts we had while under the influence may now be very different. I go back and forth. I have never been as happy thrilled or joyful as in the presence of a very accepting and encouraging woman reassuring that I am fine, that there is nothing wrong with me. There is nothing like being comfortable, loving what you have on because it looks good on you, and realizing this is perfectly fine, to feel normal while dressed and to be dressed and realize you are no longer constantly even thinking about what you are wearing for me that is the goal to be able to get up get dressed, put on my make up and jewelry, fix my hair and go about my business around the house. The thing about normal is I realize that reasonable around the house means the same thing any normal woman would wear at home - shorts and running shoes and a top, or a casual dress and flats or sandals. No woman sits around the house in an evening gown, or dressed to go out or for work. Normal would mean dressing up a little if you venture out, but at home clothing is dressing down, relaxed and comfortable home clothes....kind of like the normal sleep wear may be nothing more than a comfortable cotton oversized t shirt with panties or a cotton night gown, but most women do not dress in really silky feminine sleep wear unless sex is going to be likely so they can arouse their partner.