Fear of Success?

[Lorna]

What happens when you have had so many setbacks, frustrations, disappointments, catastrophes and tragedies in your life that you can hardly recalll any success you've had at all?

I have my comedy show next weekend, and may have landed a second comedy gig on May 5 at another location. Last weekend I went to see my dream girl sing in a band. At the end of the night we exchanged phone numbers. Needless to say she is coming to see me perform, and who knows what else?

I have never had the opportunity with someone as beautiful as her. She is so striking that she makes me look like my 74 y.o. aunt. (That’s a GOOD thing!)

Anyway, between the beautiful girl and the comedy gigs the stage is set for success, so to speak. Now I’m just waiting for the bomb to drop. I’ve had positive things all lined up before, only to have the rug pulled out from under me at the last minute. I should be happy that my luck finally seems to have changed.

I need to rid myself of this thinking. I have to stop thinking about the “what if”s.

I have also come to the realization that when out in a social setting, I am just more comfortable as Lorna. People love Lorna. People don’t like Rick, especially women. They can’t stand Rick. And when Rick tries to bring forth any of Lorna’s positive traits, then right away she will assume that Rick is gay, thus eliminating any chance I have of trying to get a date with her. Let’s face it, bottom line is that Rick is just NOT a people person. I can accept that. Let Rick handle the personal/business side of things (going to work, running personal errands, paying the bills, etc). Lorna can have all of the social situations & fun activities (going out to meet friends, going to parties, going shopping & such). Everybody loves Lorna!

I just don’t want to go through any more bombshells. Things are FINALLY more or less starting to fall into place somewhat.

[Tea Cake]

Lorna! seems to me Lorna and Rick must share the same good heart and I'll bet the success you're getting with your gigs is from sticking with it over-time---you've EARNED IT!--------I'm thinking you sound like a magnet that's going to attract things that will truly make you happy and I KNOW if your anything like me you won't take any of that happiness for granted-----artists like you swim through hard times and then bring back joy with a VENGENCE! yahooooo have fun this weekend---------hope you've been playing music too, maybe serenading time soon!)------------------ Tea-cake

[Lorna]

Lorna! seems to me Lorna and Rick must share the same good heart and I'll bet the success you're getting with your gigs is from sticking with it over-time---you've EARNED IT!--------I'm thinking you sound like a magnet that's going to attract things that will truly make you happy and I KNOW if your anything like me you won't take any of that happiness for granted-----artists like you swim through hard times and then bring back joy with a VENGENCE! yahooooo have fun this weekend---------hope you've been playing music too, maybe serenading time soon!)------------------ Tea-cake

Thanks hon... I'll try. I just don't want any more bombshells falling.

[Erica Shade]

Good luck next weekend.

Nuff Luv,

Erica Shade

[Lorna]

Thanks hon. I know that it WILL be a great weekend coming... because I'm having the day from HELL today.

[Erica Shade]

Lorna,

Keep your chin up. You are bigger than this horrible day.

Nuff Luv,

Erica Shade

[Lorna]

Lorna,

Keep your chin up. You are bigger than this horrible day.

Nuff Luv,

Erica Shade

Thanks Erica! This is the first positive interaction I have had all day long...

[RikkiOfLA]

Dear Lorna,

Interesting, my boy name is Rick, too. And very few people like him. He doesn't like many people, either.

Rikki has a lot more friends than Rick. Maybe that's cuz Rikki hangs out in the TG community, and so has something in common with people. Rick is a loner, and doesn't like sports. That's death for a guy, of course.

I bet a lot of the girls here can relate to this kind of experience.

[Beauty]

Hi Rikki,

Your Rick doesn't like sports??!?

I better not see him.

Just kidding!

Beauty

[Lorna]

Dear Lorna,

Interesting, my boy name is Rick, too. And very few people like him. He doesn't like many people, either.

Rikki has a lot more friends than Rick. Maybe that's cuz Rikki hangs out in the TG community, and so has something in common with people. Rick is a loner, and doesn't like sports. That's death for a guy, of course.

I bet a lot of the girls here can relate to this kind of experience.

OMG! My Rick is the loner type too! He's not a fan of people or get-togethers & such, but Lorna LOVES that stuff!

*hugs*

~ Lorna