I've been very, very careful not to overstep my bounds or push Lisbeth on her too much. In a nut shell, I've been baby-steppin since I told her about my CDing. We've talked at length about it and set boundries that I will not cross. She even said that I am doing everything the right way to not push her before she is ready. I'm very careful not to stress her too much.
Well it turns out that it was more of an issue than either one of us realized. My wife's therapist (Yes, something new has been added.)made her see how much it was affecting her and actually helped us both by bring certain things to light. I don't know what actually goes on in their sessions but I know that it has lightened my load tremendously. Funny thing too. I've known this therapist for about five years now and we have spoken a few times on a professional level but she never knew of my CDing. When my wife told her she was floored. Not bad or against it at all. Just the fact that she has known me as a 6'2" man for years and never suspected just kinda stunned her, I guess. My wife said that she seems to know a lot about it, things like it doesn't go away, it doesn't mean I'm any less of a man, just more of a woman. She has a positive outlook on it and I'm so glad.
Anyway, after we really got honest ( and very loud) one night, after a few tears and and few more laughs we she seems to have taken a very big step. I had been asking her to join the forum since January but she jst wasn't too keen on the idea. She was afraid of a lot of things but after she told her therapist about the forum her therapist convinced her to join. She did so last week and I'd like to thank SL and Sharon for their help and patience with her.
This week is like a total turnaround. She has asked me three times this week if I wanted to dress and of course, like10-10 WINS News Radio, "You give us 22 minutes, we'll give you a girl". We are talking so much more easily now that she knows she isn't alone.
As you may remember from earlier posts, my step daughter also knows about me and is fine with it. We've gone shopping on a few occasions and even gotten each other make-up. Well, she hadn't seen me all dolled up yet, just some not-so-hot pictures. That all changed a few nights ago.
My wife asked me if I felt liked getting dressed in the afternoon. I jumped at the chance after I was sure she was okay with it and she really was. I got all done up, make-up, wig, denim skirt, black pumps, a black Harley T shirt ( Women's) and a long sleeve denim kinda cowboy shirt. I thought I looked pretty good and so did my wife. I was sitting on the patio just enjoying being me and my wife came outside and told me her daughter had called and she was coming over to our house for something she needed. My wife said that she tried to explain that this was Lisbeth's night and I was in the back yard all dressed up. Her daughter (K) said she didn't care and she was on her way. My wife thought it was time she saw me in all my glory and sat with my and waited for K to arrive.
Well, she was much longer then she should have been and we were both getting a little nervous. I was scared sh**less but looking forward to it. When she finally arrived she was crying. I thought to myself, "This isn't going like I had hoped it would". It turns out that her defroster broke and somehow the entire windshield went foggy and she couldn't keep it wiped so she could see and she had almost had an accident. She was there for a few minutes and still hadn't seen me sitting on the pato. When she finally walked over and saw me her expression said it all. She said she was shocked that I looked so good as a woman. She loved the look. I felt so relieved.
When she was ready to go home my wife asked if I could follow her and make sure she got there okay. So I got my purse and walked to my car. K got a good long look at me walking the length of the driveway and I could see her smiling the whole time. I followed her home (about 5 miles) and I went for a ride. I was on cloud nine! I went to a rest area on the parkway and just walked around the lot for awhile. I felt so at ease with my life at that moment. So happy with the way things are gong with my wife and her daughter.
I had to take K to a DR.s appt. the next day and I had to ask her what she thought. She laughed and told me I worry too much and that she was fine with the whole thing. I really believe she is. She laughed and said that I have great legs. I told her that I'd heard that before. I asked her if she thought I could pass. She said that she honestly did think that I could go anyahere and no one would be the wiser. I was thrilled to hear that from her, a gorgeous GG herself. I feel so much closer to both my wife and K. I know that this is very hard to spring on anyone at anyime and waiting until we were married for 6 yrs. before I told her anything didn;\'t make it any smoother but things have a way of working out.
Thanks to all of you at the forum for all your support and thank you to SL and Sharon again for being so kind to my wife, the "newbie".
Lisbeth
BTW, my wifes name is Darling(SO).
