Feeling Like A Woman

[Noeleena]

Hi,

For many of those with in society who are men dressing is part of their lives and is importaint, they are of cause male / men and like womens clothes, for many reasons .

others as your saying feel trapped in a male body and wont out, remember that its not the body , because parts of it yes seem or are wrong in that persons eye,s and so desire to be like women remember our bodys are made up of both male and female hormones, how much we have plus a lot more about us of cause is how our bodys became. leaning more to male or female, some where a long the line there was a mis match and is the cause of the dilemma we find our selfs in. of cause some are both male and female so is very different again.

i dont know what its like to be a male and like you or others for that matter, i would find that very hard and extreme to have to work through head and mind bending detail,

my self that would be going insane to start with after that it would not matter, as suiside would be the relief, i know......when youv been down that road, or heading down it.

can i say to be a woman you have to.... grow..... into being one and to know your self .

A person can have aspects of both male and female weather its in body or in mind that too is allso part of our makeup, there is no hard and fast rule, and each person can have both weather we do or not depends on the person,

Where things are different is how we are hard wired some are all 100 % hard wired male and no way would they see them selfs as a tiny bit female that goes into Pshychologically and Emotionally, again will depend on the person,
and female so different from males though many males dont understand females in their makeup ,

The other very importaint thing is in how you accept your self, and how you live your life, and that is importaint to you and you alone.

Many trans people i know get so wrapped up in themselfs to the point nothing or any one is a part of their life and they miss out on life and some put a wall around them selfs , How sad ,

keep your eye,s open and enjoy your life in what ever way you go, because if you stop smelling the Rose,s you miss the lovely perfume they have for you,

...noeleena...

[Sandy]

Noeleena

That was awesome and hit me so hard and I appreciate the words and knowledge that you have, thanks again for the amazing words to all the girls here, I for one appreciate that

Thanks

Sandy

[JanGriffin]

I believe that I will never "feel like a woman", I can't...wrong body, wrong genetic makeup, I'll never be one, not for real, unless science comes up with something to alter our genes, the best I can ever hope to feel is..
"I feel comfortable and happy and what I perceive to be feminine and in touch with my innermost feelings and thoughts and totally engaged with being who I am without regret"

Just a random thought

That is the happiness of being dressed as the woman I would want to be. When so, I truly feel a woman with normal female interests and desires. Yea -not a mother, an advantage of being a TG woman - not have to deal with child birth - just enjoying life.

[Noeleena]

Hi,

Jan .

Oh Dear,

The advantage of being a TG woman, not have to deal with child birth,

Do you reilise what that means to us, how that hurts us so much we are wired in such a way to have children and when you cant that cuts a part of us so deep, words can never express my inner most deepest feelings with that , It cuts to the very core of myself in a way most will never grasp

I know my body is different and i dont have my womb ,some of us are like that yet our wiring is just as female as any other female who has their womb , i feel that lose hey we have to live with that and no way does it change,

To carry our own child that does something to us thats where most men ...dont ...understand us part of why we are so different from men ,

For many women our whole being is about having .....OUR.... OWN ...child. Oh dear ......

A wise woman can predict the future, Because ,..... she creates it,


...noeleena...

[Ms. Erin]

Wow I don't really know what to add here to this post. So many great words and expressions/opinions and thoughts of our life. Reading this was very rewarding. (English is my second language I hope I say it right)

What can I add? Well perhaps my limited experience or feelings. Before I decided to come out, which I am currently working on, it was like... "what happened in my house, stay in my house". So being dressed but not completely dressed, lipstick but no complete makeup, I still have a "complete" picture of the feminine me and felt great.

Now I am working on a complete "makeover" as you wish to be able to go outside and come out. But still I have the same feelings as what I think who I am. Confusing right? Yes it still is.

Thanks for the many thoughts in this post.

Erin

[Marissa Mae]

Hi,

I too am uncertain whether I can ever feel like a woman. But I'd be curious to know how many GGs find they can agree with the mass of GGs just what "feeling like a woman" is. Could it be a fish-in-the-fishbowl problem, where you can't tell what it is because you're inside it?

I'd be very interested in anything you GGs choose to say about what you, who are after all the experts, think feeling like a woman is. Might educate us all!

Love, Marissa Mae

[Anne Bonny]

I would add to this discussion this inner feeling which intensifies and comes over me is first, then comes the desire to change so that everything is consistent. Then and this is most of the time my masculine norm intensifies and so comes the desire to change again because I do not want to be in feminine things any longer, so the make up, the jewelry, the feminine clothing and lingerie go back where they go and on comes masculine clothing and my male self goes about doing what he happens to be doing at that time.

No female clothing or male clothing have nothing to do with what drives me to wear either, it is this gender intensity whichever is more prominent which right now is well feminine.

I may not ever understand this intangible inexplicable nebulous whatever it is within me, but I do not have to to have finally understood it enough to relax about it all, is just is and there is nothing wrong with any of it. Those who get excited and exercised about it all the prigs and the prudes who believe theirselves to be self appointed arbiters of right and wrong and what is and is not moral or what is or is not acceptable can go hang somewhere. I am a human, this is who I am and I am not about to apologize to anyone or allow them to rule over me I have the very basic right to freely be who I am as a human being.

[Bernice]

I imagine that to feel like a woman would be no different than feeling like a man. These are stereotypes of the extremes of the gender spectrum, and I tire of the excessive attention these notions get.

On Facebook, I give my friends a hard time if they assert that "only a real man" or "only a real woman" would or could do some something.

Even if I were 45 years younger and wealthy enough for SRS, I don't think I would suddenly "feel like a woman" after I healed. Even when I haven't cross-dressed for weeks, I don't feel like a man. I just feel like me, wishing I could be different perhaps, but still me, with all my imperfections.

The biggest problems come when you feel "like" something that society ignorantly - arbitrarily - forbids you to be.

What is important is that I feel like a person, with something to offer the community, and that I accept who I am, regardless of where on the gender spectrum "I" fall.

Hugs,

Bernice

[Eileen (SO)]

It's been some time since I had something to add here, and all the responses are interesting too!
My lovely CD husband says that he doesn't feel like a woman when dressed, he feels feminine. In that mode his (oops, her) mannerisms change. Not wiping her hands on pants (skirt), stifling a burp, proper posture while walking and sitting. And most of all, being aware of your surroundings. You are no longer the dominant gender. The feeling of the vulnerable female becomes part of the experience.
Just like a woman.

Eileen

[Martha G]

When I dress as a woman I feel feminine and womanly.

In my mind I become a woman and thus emulate being a mature lady as much as possible.

Not being raised as a female, there is a great deal of difference but observing women I can still get close to becoming one when dressed.

Since I thoroughly enjoy dressing as a woman I think that I can close to being one as well,

The older I get the more woman like and feminine I have been becoming.

[Diana Michelle]

From time I go back and read some of the threads, particularly those that come to life after a period of stasis such as this one. I was quite taken back when I read Jan post.

That is the happiness of being dressed as the woman I would want to be. When so, I truly feel a woman with normal female interests and desires. Yea -not a mother, an advantage of being a TG woman - not have to deal with child birth - just enjoying life.

Before I want to thank Noeleena for quickly responding to this one.

To myself and many other post ops perhaps the largest regret we have is that we were never able bear children. Please don't jump down my throat here ladies! I know that motherhood doesn't make one any more or any less a woman. Yes we all knew full well going in that fact and no I do not regret my choice and I am sure any other post op (M2F or F2M) will concur. Regardless of how you feel about being a parent personally to me childbirth has to be one of the most satisfying experiences anyone can have. I have several close friends who have told me many times in spite of the 9 months of pregnancy especially the last couple feeling like a bloated whale and the pain of childbirth it was the high points of their lives.

I have 2 stepdaughters from my first husband. They were 14 and 11 when I came in to their life but they were gracious to allow me in and I hope in at even a little way I had an influence on their lives and the beautiful people they have become. I wish I had something witty to end here but Noeleena said it perfectly so I will close quoting her.

A wise woman can predict the future, Because ,..... she creates it,

[Paulette]

. . . My lovely CD husband says that he doesn't feel like a woman when dressed, he feels feminine. In that mode his (oops, her) mannerisms change. Not wiping her hands on pants (skirt), stifling a burp, proper posture while walking and sitting. And most of all, being aware of your surroundings. You are no longer the dominant gender. The feeling of the vulnerable female becomes part of the experience.
Just like a woman.

Okay, but I still don't know what it's like to be anything other than myself. I know what I imagine, and how I feel when I'm dressed or trying to be feminine, especially when my wife is being Xena-ish. But I truly don't know how anyone, male or female, actually feels. I do guess and imagine, and can only guess and imagine how anyone here thinks they feel.

Consciousness and perception = NOT my bitches.

[Heather W]

My lovely CD husband says that he doesn't feel like a woman when dressed, he feels feminine. In that mode his (oops, her) mannerisms change.

I think Eileen has said something here that seems to address the root of this issue. I am not sure what a woman should feel like so I asked my mother, sister, and several friends, all GG's. While they all had some form of an answer what I really heard is that is just how they feel. Do I feel like a woman, I guess so but something Eileen said rings oh so true. Is it about "feeling like a woman" or feeling feminine. From what I have read here as well as many other posts in addition to what I have heard in chat many times too many girls confuse the two.

Comments I have read about wearing slacks while en femme or how a woman can't really be feminine if she doesn't wear hose while wearing a dress tell me too many associate the clothes with being a woman. There is so much more to it as I am sure many know. Like I said I don't know what a woman feels so how can I know if I feel like a woman? As many have said it is something you are born as or not. Yes I feel I am a woman and an transitioning with the eventual hopes of GRS. Will that allow me to finally know what a woman feels like? I highly doubt that but if it does I will let all of you know.

You are no longer the dominant gender. The feeling of the vulnerable female becomes part of the experience.
Just like a woman.

Here is a statement I can truly understand and hopefully any of you who go out do as well. I can remember those first few times out and about. Sure there is the fear of being discovered but as Eileen put it that vulnerability males don't understand. That being out there, a potential target to who or whatever. I know I very quickly learned to be much more aware of my surroundings, to always be on the lookout. As she put it, "Just like a woman."

[Paulette]

I'm pretty sure I never felt "like a woman." I'm also pretty sure that what I do feel when dressed or have the urge to dress, is as Eileen's spouse said, feminine. Or at least my assumption and impression of what feminine feels like, as observed in other women.

I've known a lot of rather masculine women. Bikers and school executives, butch lesbians and dominatrices. I don't think of them as particularly feminine, though they are obviously female. Until relatively recently, the school system and the post office, was where women could become powerful within their profession. And power is a masculine quality. What would a Xena, or a Zenobia do today?

Power, dominance, leadership, are all masculine qualities. And because in western culture almost all sex is seen as perverted. (The Woody Allen quote comes to mind, here.) And so these masculine properties, when exercised by a woman, become sexualized, and thereby perverted, too.

Nonetheless, feeling like a woman, and feeling feminine, and feeling like one thinks a woman feels, are probably pretty much the same thing, even though I have philosophical quibbles with the first. (See Wikipedia: what is it like to be a bat?)

Softness, receptiveness, nurturing, seductiveness. They are all strongly associated with femininity. I have known men with some of these qualities, too. But they are relatively rare, and almost automatically associated with the supposed perversion of the homosexual male, and its usually suppressed or sublimated (I have been told that I am at my sexiest when I'm doing a presentation or giving a lecture. Go figure!)

So yes, I often desire to feel feminine, and to behave as a woman behaves, even when not decked out in Victoria's Secret lingerie, or a Japanese Lolly outfit. I just don't have much practice at it, and I'm not a very good actor. FWIW, I'd really like to try a Xena outfit some Halloween. I think I'd enjoy being a boy being a girl being a boy . . . being me.

[Suzanne]

I think Diana Michelle hit the nail on the head.
Women's lives are so much richer than men's (IMHO) because of that essential biological difference..
I can't begin to imagine what the experience of periods, childbirth and motherhood must be like.. each of which in their own special way add to a woman's make-up.
Simply adopting the outward appearance of womanhood (as we do, or in my case, used to do) can give only a part-picture of what it means to belong to the sisterhood. This isn't meant as a criticism of any here who do take solace in dressing (as I sorely wish I could) - for many, it's the only way that they can approach the desired female state that we all feel such an affinity for..
Me..? After years of denial, purging and angst, I finally accepted that a large part of me is drawn as if by magnetic attraction to the world of women - but whether that attraction would be enough to sustain me living as a woman 24/7 I'm not so sure. It's almost 10 years since I last dressed but hardly a day goes by that I don't miss it intensely.
I wish I could step back from this, and be content in the male role, but I don't think that's ever going to happen.
Suzanne