Supporting the ones you love

[Norma Jean (F)]

My Dad and I are each others main support system. We have shared many secrets with each other and have created a trust that is hard to explain. The main reason for our bond is because my mom refuses to support us on any aspect of life she believes she can't control, especially his CDing and and my engagement of almost two years.

I no longer live with my parents, yet am in the same city. I want my dad to feel open about asking my advice and know that I am willing to listen/help (he has done it all his life for me...I want to return the favor). He personally came out to me around the time I got engaged, and has asked for my help on a few different occasions, but with my mom around it makes it difficult to accomplish much.

I am curious how did many of you seek support from your loved ones, and how did they give support that wasn't always anticipated?

[DonnaT]

My daughter knows, but I've never asked her for any kind of support.

My son knows, and since he lives at home, his support is in the fact that he has no problems with me dressing around the house.

[Carol Ann]

My wife knew before we got married because my dear mother told her,
my only daughter knows and all she said was "as long as you are happy daddy".

I have a son who knows as he has seen me dress and doesn't bring it up at all.
My wife is 100% supportive as she enjoys Carol. To bad everyone can't have a place in their hearts for people who are a litte different.

[Kandis]

My wife has known for 15+ years now, she and I have only been married for just over 8.5 years. Our 15 year old daughter (my step daughter) knows as well, she figured it out for herself when she was around 10 years old and is very supportive of my dressing. In fact, she has come to me on at least 2 occasions if she could borrow one of my slips because the dress she was going to wear was rather see through.

Since you have such a great relationship with your dad, your best option is to tell him that you are there for him, maybe offer him a chance to come to your home if he desires and can dress there.

[Leeza]

My wife knew before we started dating as my ex told her. We have been married almost 35 years.

I can't say that she is supportive, but she hasn't said much about what I wear around the house and out in public. What I usually wear could pass either way unless you look close.

The most support comes from a granddaughter. I have totaly dressed at her place and taken pics. She has shopped with me for anything and everything. We have discused make up and done each other's nails.

For most of us I think that support is having someone we can discuss clothing and makeup with and a place where we can dress. Fantistic support is having someone to shop with and go places with while enfem. Of cours a lot of that has to do with the comfort level of all those envolved

Leeza

[Joan]

My wife has known from within a few a few weeks of us being married. Although she does not condone she has been supportive, and does not object to me wearing about the house in the evening and to bed.

Joan

[Monica Frasier]

I'm a bit envious. My daughter is currently in her 3rd year of college. She learned of my fem self from her mother just prior to our divorce. I tried damage control and to present it from my perspective. But she long ago sided with her mom and one of her biggest reactions was to switch from referring to me as 'dad/dy' to referring to me as 'insert male name here'.

Nice, huh?

[Leeza]

It is sad that so many family members are not in the least bit accepting.

I have one son who is not accepting even though he knows. I make it a point to not dress very much around him. It is ironic though that his wife and kids are accepting of me.



Leeza

[Joan]

Hi Monica

I do hope your daughter pulls around and accepts you as U are. I guess u do not care too much about your ex wife's views.

Best of luck for the future, and that you meet someone more accepting.

Joan

[April Rose]

Norma Jean, Your dad is really lucky to have a daughter like you. I've gotten support when I needed it, but to be honest, I've always had to ask for it. It's never come on it's own.

[KimberlyS]

Norma that is so wonderful that you can be there for your Dad and he for you. That is what real family is, being there for each other no matther what. Maybe not always understanding but still being there.

My wife knew of my CDing prior to getting married. Her support has always been up and down. Now in the gutter with a divorce in the process.

With your mom not being supportive that will make things difficult. But make the time to support each other. You may have to be creative making the time.

I have recently told my kids, parents and siblings as my wife was trying to use my CDing as blackmail and did not want them to hear it from anyone else. My kids have not wanted to talk about it any farther but I have told them I am open to talk when ever they want to. My sister is accepting and the rest do not understand and do not want to be involved or know any more at this point. But I still interact with them like I always have; at least at this point. Time will tell. But I have not been thrown out of the family yet and do not think I will be.

kimberlys cd
joe in a skirt

[Bernice]

My mother knew, and was utterly hostile and abusive about it. She passed away thinking I "outgrew it as a teenager".

If other relatives know, not that I have many, they have never said so, nor have I volunteered.

I told my wife (at the time wife to be), as a precondition to serious discussions of living our lives together. That was 35+ years ago. She has been very tolerant, and sometimes very supportive. She takes a practical view of it. "It's just clothing, people! Who is harmed?"

I read posts on Facebook by friends and acquaintances supportive of GLBT, and I want so much to ask them "But it's still OK to hate crossdressers, right?", and yet, I cannot muster the courage to test them.

Hugs,

Bernice