Crossdressers-Haven.com

We desire the simple right to enjoy comfort and feminie elegance afforded by wearing a beautiful and cool dress and perhaps some sexy high heeled sandles, bangly earrings, a necklass to accent and adorn our chest and neck. glossy red nails, smooth legs, and lucious lipstick and make-up. I have found dresses and women's lingerie to be more comfortable than male clothing. a silky short nighgown which bares the shoulders is cooler and more comfortable for sleeping than a tee shirt. We are transgendered - meaning we are partially feminine more so than other men and we desire these things, and enjoy feeling feminine and pretty. This is simply another reason for our dressing.

I get to pretend I have hair again, with one of my wigs...

Anne,
My heart goes out to you as you have hit the nail on the head , I too more then anything else love to feel and enjoy my feminine self

"I have found dresses and women's lingerie to be more comfortable than male clothing. a silky short nighgown which bares the shoulders is cooler and more comfortable for sleeping than a tee shirt"

I completely agree with you

How nice it would be to wear a simple everyday dress and some sandels freely around the house with a sense of full acceptance from my wife instead of tolerence.

Anne,
Tolerence is better than my wife feeling that it would be gounds for divorce.

Sorry, in this day and age even as some progress is being made, the majority of women are very conventional, and though more tolerant understanding and sympathetic then men they do have their reasons. We have to be upfront at the beginning of a relationship for one. They may be jealous or threatened if you are attractive en femm - you are competition. She wants to be the center of attention, she wants to be loved, protected and cared for by her man - does not want to give up what is essentially a submissive position to be in charge on occasion because there is also power there. She wants her Man, and does not want any of this known by anybody. Very few women are able to tolerate and understand to that level, and an exceeding few accept this like my husband betty..... I suppose this means not doing it when she is around, you may over several years work in very little ways over a long, long, long long long time be able to bring her to some kind of understanding that No, I am not gay, I like women and I love you in particular. I am the same man you married. I have this as part of who I am, will keep it within agreed limits, but not everyone it totally male or female some of us are a mix to some degree and that this is part of who you are. Even so, you cannot push, there will be times when she is open, use those little windows of opportunity to introduce a tiny bit of this to discuss and moving in glacial speed much can be accomplished to reshape the mountain over a number of years - but sometimes not... Good luck. If you meet a wall, it may just be your lot in life to live in the closet if this is the love of your life and is a life time committment.

Anne Bonny wrote:She wants to be the center of attention, she wants to be loved, protected and cared for by her man....you may over several years work in very little ways over a long, long, long long long time be able to bring her to some kind of understanding that .... I have this as part of who I am, will keep it within agreed limits, but not everyone it totally male or female some of us are a mix to some degree and that this is part of who you are.

I read this in combination with your hair-styling thread - where you talk about styling your wife's hair for her because she has dementia - and it brought to mind an earlier thread I came across (2005) where Virginia talks about taking care of an elderly lady who also has mental problems. One big thing Virginia did was make her up:

Gotta tell what I did today and how it affected me. I sat my charge in front of her mirror, and started making her up. Some foundation, a little blush, some light eye shadow, then it hit me - what am I doing??? Is this for me or her, is she enjoying it or am I taking advantage of her for my benefit. Then she looked at me and an ever so slight smile, almost like a MonaLisa smile. Both appreciation for my making her up and I could almost sense her thinking "I know why you are so good at this too!"

http://crossdressers-forum.com/forums/v ... hp?p=64117

So, to me you're already working at your wife's acceptance of your CDing in one of those sideways, little ways when you do her hair.

Wow I'm actually speechless (according to my wife that never happens) In two short posts Anne has managed to sum up so much for me that it's surreal.