just checking in

[Absaroka]

Hi folks,

It's been a while, but I thought I'd check in. Brief history for newcomers. For a long time I worked alone out of my house. This allowed me the luxury of wearing what I wanted for several hours a day, several hours a week. My wife knew a little, didn't seem to want more, and to be honest, I enjoyed my secretiveness. When I started going out dressed, it was usually for walks in the woods and that sort of thing. Usually once or twice a year she'd go away for a week, often to visit her parents, and I'd be dressed in my girl clothes for much of the time, assuming she took the kids with her.

Last year she retired and I wondered what would happen. I found that with her around, I didn't miss dressing up much. Perhaps because for years I got to do it A LOT. But I find I still look forward to my staycations with my clothes. I had several of those over the last year.

It's been several months now. Mostly I don't really care, but today she and my daughter were away and I felt a strong urge to dress. So I did, tights, bra, shirt and skirt. It's kind of warm here and that was plenty. Did yard work, chores around the house and practiced some.

Usually if I have the house to myself for a few hours I don't like to do this. After having half a day to do it, I don't like to say well I've got an hour and that's it. Not really worth the trouble.

We talk a lot here about how our desire to cross dress (and I'm definitely cross dressing, I'm definitely a man in a dress and nothing more) waxes and wanes. And it does. It hasn't gone away, I doubt it ever will. But it's no longer has the power it did.

I'm really enjoying my wife's retirement. She is so much happier, relaxed, and fun. And (not but, and. the word is important) I miss the opportunity to be my "girl" I miss pulling weeds, doing yard work, and walking by the railroad embankment en femme. At least I got to do it a lot. And my 'girl" or my feminine side or whatever gets to express other non clothing aspects of me all the time. The sense of wonder looking at the stars or the sea or listening to music or whatever.

So yeah, there's life after we (mostly) stop dressing. And for me it's pretty good. Which is not to way what is or is not right for anyone else.

BTW, Anita, I took your suggestion and did what I should have done a long time ago. I wrote out a half dozen blues choruses and memorized them. It's made me a lot more comfortable in my soloing. We had a gig last night. I got two solos. The other trombone players, who went to music school and that sort of thing, got the rest. I was pretty happy with them. The feeling of being surrounded by the music because you are in the middle of the band, hearing the drums and bass, and the trumpets behind me, and the rest being a blur, is incredible.

Hope all is well with everyone

Absaroka

[Anthony Simon]

Nice to have you back, Zari.

I'm really enjoying my wife's retirement. She is so much happier, relaxed, and fun. And (not but, and. the word is important) I miss the opportunity to be my "girl" I miss pulling weeds, doing yard work, and walking by the railroad embankment en femme.

I guess it's one of those things about the CDing, "You never know till you know". Like it's not really in the books how we feel or relate to it.