Crossdressers-Haven.com

I am kind of surprised not to have seen a question on this. Kind of like the old Monty Python skit where the virgin bloke asks "You've done it...You've slept with a lady - what's it like?" So Those who have undergone GRS now have the body of the opposite sex. I am curious...what's it like? I mean are you able to describe physically how you feel, what are the differences, the frustrations, the likes, and the dislikes now that you are no longer equipped as before? Can't wait for a good answer to that. Any regrets? Or do you regret that you did not do it sooner? Personally I do not believe GRS would be right for me, my gender is kind of 50/50 and I suppose that makes me ACDC No...not in THAT way! I mean sometimes I am masculine, sometimes I am feminine but sexually I prefer women, always have...always will....but If I should ever uh - you know - decide to bat for the other side you will be the first one on my list....Anne

I read this post last night and I am still not really sure what type of answer you are looking for here. Of course there are physical differences. One being when I pull my panties on I don't have anything I need to "tuck" away. My bra is there to support my breasts not silicone forms. Certain lace trim on panties and bras does itch! I do have a waistline and hips so my slacks and skirts fit differently. Are these the types of things you asking about?

I can tell you one major difference I found out right away was when being out and using the restroom. Now I have to find a empty stall, hope the seat is clean and sanitary, if any doubts use toilet paper or a seat cover on it, find a place to put my purse, and this is all just the beginning! Then in the confinement of that tiny "prison cell" I have to yank my skirt and slip up. Next I tug down my pantyhose and panties down and now finally I am ready to sit and do my business! Now once things are attended to and cleaned up I have to stand up and again in that tiny space I have to redress and make sure everything is where it is supposed to be and not caught in the waistband of one or more of my underpinnings. Now I am ready to exit the stall, wash my hands and check my make-up. Guys on the other hand just yank down a zipper, whip it out and let it fly! Then a quick rinse of their fingers with a little water and off they go. And men wonder why it takes us s long to "powder our nose."

Dear Anne,

I believe the Monty Python skit line was 'nudge, nudge, say no more'. I always like British comedy. As for your question, there is another thread on this forum, 'feeling like a woman', that is nearly the same, just not as explicit. It is curious to imagine what the opposite gender actually feels during intimacy encounters. I've met just two post op MTF. The last one was still in post op pain, so that doesn't count. The first one started dating men after the top part being done. That was a few years ago and I so wanted to ask more questions at the time, but was too timid. This goes to the question of whether one is straight or bi in the first place. For this conversation, I'll refer to 'S' as the post op friend. S was a straight male that got divorced, and proceeded to live full time female. Facial reconstruction and a very nice boob job later, she was dating men mostly. I never had the chance to ask how that sexual preference switch is thrown. Was that a hidden desire all her life? Sadly, she moved out of state shortly after the bottom surgery and didn't have the chance to compare notes. How could my physical arousal compare with someone after that much surgery? How would one woman describe her 'O' to another? We are all so different, and the partner surely makes a difference too! I have seen a film on how the 'Lopitoffofme' procedure is done and even without the born male appendage, my knees clamped shut.

Eileen

Books are written about this!!!! Having had the ultimate honor of "participating" with a friend from the start of hormones to the trip to the Dr who performed the GRS, waiting while she was in surgery, holding her hand while she awoke and the most beautiful part was as she came to, she asked for me and I was sitting there holding her hand. When she realized "it was over," she had a glow come over her face that I can only say that it was the right thing for her to do. She is a "happy camper" now!!!!

The comments by Diana are spot on! Getting "redressed" before coming out of that stall is really a big challenge. Some of us don't get it right sometimes!

For the physical aspects, well first if you are born with this "gift," certain female, can I say, "values" come with the territory. Empathy comes to mind, listening more, picking up on certain personality quirks more easily, and on and on ----------- its a girl thing!

Then the actual physical manifestations, the "bedroom" thing if you will! As has been said, we (male or female) have different "reactions" to, well, sexual relations. "Wham bam - thank you madam" to the long hours of passion, to the weekly get it over, I'm so tired. Most of us can identify with each scenario can we not? But to get down to the basics, I know for a fact that the big "O" is very much different between the male and female!!! I won't go into detail here, but I will say this, if a "caring" male could ever experience a "heart felt" female orgasm, he would never want to deny his partner her having that "release!"

Been there --- love doing it!!!

Virginia

ok...It was kind of an all around question. Before...and after. How have things changed...any surprises or regrets. Insights or things you learned that you did not expect. I get the obvious those female items now fit as intended, and I suppose I can imagine the sex part though I read somewhere that sexual pleasure and the ability to have an orgasm is not guaranteed after MTF transitioning. I am just interested but it is unlikely I myself would transition - it is not right for most and my gender is too 50/50.

Oh and thanks for responding...I am going to that other thread, thanks.

Anne to me your other thread is more on the mental and emotional sides of femininity whatever the hell they are. This thread is more about the physical differences.

No Anne the ability to orgasm is not guaranteed after GRS however I do not know of a single post op who has not achieved orgasm. Some do not achieve it during intercourse but there are other ways to get there! I have gotten to the big "O" during intercourse and yes it is earth moving! Like Eileen said, it is difficult to describe. Partners, circumstances, even the potion has a bearing on it. While every one may be different each is wonderful!

You ask if I have any regrets or would have done anything differently and I have to say no. We all have regrets over things in our past but as far as changing them, not a thing! It is easy to Monday morning quarterback, I prefer to look back and said those past experiences are what has made me the woman I am today.

Eileen (SO) wrote: S was a straight male that got divorced, and proceeded to live full time female. Facial reconstruction and a very nice boob job later, she was dating men mostly. I never had the chance to ask how that sexual preference switch is thrown. Was that a hidden desire all her life? Eileen

Probably was hidden within her all her life whether "S" even knew it herself. As she had GRS it was obvious she was recognized as a female. Isn't the "natural" attraction male-female? It is possible it started as a simple curiosity as all post-ops have. I know many of us have tried relationships with both genders, just to discover which team we feel most comfortable batting for.

Eileen (SO) wrote:I have seen a film on how the 'Lopitoffofme' procedure is done and even without the born male appendage, my knees clamped shut.

Eileen

I have to agree with you Eileen it is a bit traumatic to be polite! Maybe everyone should see it so they realize how determined and courageous as we girls are to go through what we do to become the person we see ourselves as! Either that or how crazy we really are!

Thanks, it is interesting. I think needing or not needing SRS is a matter of degrees but that it should not, as some in the community seem to feel, be an issue, because the intensity or the degree or amount of feminine gender we have inside is whatever it is. My thinking is it is the balance of our gender which determines our need for SRS or not but that all of us in this community are partly of feminine gender or we would not be here. I am glad you are not like that.

I bet all of us think ...gee...wouldn't it be nice to have a female body so that we could experience everything to the full, everything would fit, etc....but when our masculine desires moved into prominence we would be in trouble. Perhaps some of those would be just fine but I suppose it raises the importance of the screening that weeds out those who should not do this and not knowing I assume this is still a mandatory thing at least in the United States? If the wrong people are allowed this surgery it might end very badly for them psychologically.

I suppose I am just rambling aimlessly here.

Oh...So most can achieve the "O" hum that sounds good....having known both is the "C" or the "O" better or are they different but equally pleasurable?

Anne, I am a non-op TS. I have been living full time well over 10 years now and have zero regrets except the obvious of why didn't do this sooner. The differences described here are all true but there is more to being a woman than that. It is difficult to describe but from reading some of your other posts I think you are starting to understand. It isn't an us versus them thing! No two of us are alike so our feelings and emotions are all as individual as we are. Rather than trying to analyze yourself let go and enjoy being you! If what you are trying to analyze is you then find yourself a good therapist. If not let it go and enjoy being female when you feel the desire and male when that is called for.

I am doing that I think, I was just curious here. I really think I have made progress perhaps it is not so obvious but I do feel I have changed and advanced in the right direction - accepting and just being.