Our feminine self

[Anne Bonny]

My feminine identity and mindset is inspirational for me, or perhaps it just is. Internally I find that I am sensitive and emotional, not really moment to moment but across the day and over time. I feel at peace, I feel more loving, more caring, and more open and accepting and gentle inside. I find I share interests that women tend to have beauty...pretty clothes, jewelry and shoes, hair.... I also find I enjoy being with other women, I enjoy being in the company of women and in such activities women would tend to do together to have fun. Art. Wine. Make up. talking about life and family. Enjoying the beauty of our world. Caring about others. Those who are important in our lives. I suppose simply being able to live out and simply be able to be this part of who I am is very pleasant I am simply loving just being able to be my female self...Anne. 

I wonder if others feel this way inside leading them to simply be who they are, being gender fluid of course I also have another mindset but this above is Anne's.

[Requal Jo]

When Requal is able to make an appearance (as she is very private in her appearance), I understand just how you are feeling Anne. It is a whole different 'world' when Requal is present. And when Requal has to disappear, the loss of that femininity leaves a vacuum in my life.

[Stephanie M]

My feminine identity and mindset is inspirational for me, or perhaps it just is. Internally I find that I am sensitive and emotional, not really moment to moment but across the day and over time. I feel at peace, I feel more loving, more caring, and more open and accepting and gentle inside..

Is that really feminine or is that a stereotype that women are more of those things than men are?
I'm not criticizing it's just a thought that popped into my head. The way I see it we tend not to think of people as individuals as much as we do as part of a group, whether it's your political beliefs, the music that you like, your hobbies and everything else. We tend to have monolithic thinking a lot of times and are baffled by those who don't fit the mold.

[Noeleena]

Hi,

How is the makeup of a person defind wether your male or female I know some men who are no different than women their nature how they go about details how they see things the caring loving tender touch there just is no difference when you see it in action take the clothes away dress them men and women the same so they look alike stand back and watch , theres no difference I know iv seen it and been on the end of that loving tender touch ,
.................................................
close your eye,s and let it sweep over you no words nothing spoken just the feel.

................................................................................................

I know you,d never know who the person was trust me on that,,,,,,, I know...... till you,v been there .

It has nothing at all to do about being feminine male or female. see it and feel it for what it is,

I know what im like yes can be a stroppy female tough as nails and a fighter pig headed for that matter , I don't hide what I am , yet im very feminine by nature very soft no different from other females yes theres detail and lots of differences we have if you look at us to find differences and why we are different from men I know I am plus more yet does that take away that we all have some male and female inside of us does it allways show , no,

its still there take our hormones just don't base every thing on them and how our body functions wether it,s T or E they are only a miner part of the over all of what makes us who we are, as you go deeper into our selfs we get lost in the maze of really who we are, we are so very complex it beggers belive just how much,

Am I feminine by nature or did I act that to be accepted in our womens world ask my women friends they know me so well, they can answer , I don't act and never have, and this as well did I wont to be feminine ,, no, did I wont to be a female . again ...NO...I had no say,

my body made that very clear,

For those who wont to be feminine or like women need to understand is that really you or a wont ,

As you go through your body makeup and what makes you the person you are, be real to your self .

Don't try and over lay your real self because of a wont just try and under stand who you are then build on that, allways go back to is this...... Really who I am...... or am I trying be some one im not because I wont to be that other person, look at your self from this side Psychologically Mentally and Emotionally get those in perspective and you,ll see the real you, over ride all that and then the drama comes in,

...noeleena...

[Victoria K.]

I respect all the opinions mentioned here but find Ann's the one that fits how i feel the most.Enjoy a women's company much more than a man's.Woman are not afraid to show emotion and men seem to hide it.Emotions should be shared and understood.Emotions can get out of hand at times but still would rather see and feel them instead of hiding.I enjoy the freedom of a hug, a kiss, dancing alone and looking pretty in public.Being a man these things are looked at as not normal and brand you as gay or weird.The world is getting better at not being so judgmental but still has ways to go.

[Lacey Hadley]

When I am dressed en femme, notably fully dressed as Lacey I enjoy how that femininity in her look and style softens my male character. Of course I am still who I am and my in born and life long honed character exists intact. Being en femme just takes my mind, thoughts and actions to another place. A softer, more emotional place. I can let being feminine peak interests in many female, ideals, enjoyments and thoughts. But even dressed as Lacey I will keep my core values and character traits intact. Just as my feminine side through cding has effect on my male side in some ways when in drab. Much of it is rather subconscious to me.

Fully dressed as Lacey can take my mind to sexual places it would not go when in drab. As the years passed by and I evaluate my life and feelings even though I am heterosexual as a male, I have found when fully dressed and IMO making the best effort to look as feminine, sensual and even sexual as I can, at times dressed as Lacey my mind wanders to the thought of being courted by a gentleman. I've never taken such feelings to any reality, but Lacey in her femininity does let my mind go there at times. These thoughts do not enter my mind when in drab, only en femme and it's oddly weird but interesting and honestly pleasurable when I'm all dressed as Lacey.

My interaction with both genders in my day to day life is totally respectful (if they return said respect to me) and fair, enjoyable to each as a person and not a gender. Be it my feminine mindset or my rather normal male mindset I give most the benefit of the doubt. Of course discussions with men will be often different than with women. The genders are different no matter what cultural-marxists, feminists and beta (white knight) males try to claim and say. Yes, many topics in life will and do overlap the genders, but I find talking about these will still often be different in lexicon when talking to women then when talking to men or in mixed company. This is fine and makes conversation often more interesting. Picking and choosing words for me when talking to dudes and when talking to gals is interesting to my mind at the time of conversation.

My interaction with others when dressed as Lacey has been rare and only has been with females. Lacey in such an environment takes me to a 180degree different place than normally as my male life will. Stuff I talked about as such are things I don't really do when in drab, it's quite fun and enlightening.

Cding and dressing fully as Lacey helps keep my life sane. The femininity of cding and especially when fully dressed as Lacey is a compliment to my rather typical male life and that is ok with me.

[Stephanie M]

Fully dressed as Lacey can take my mind to sexual places it would not go when in drab. As the years passed by and I evaluate my life and feelings even though I am heterosexual as a male, I have found when fully dressed and IMO making the best effort to look as feminine, sensual and even sexual as I can, at times dressed as Lacey my mind wanders to the thought of being courted by a gentleman.

I'm not really sexual as Stephanie most of the time, but sometimes after being dressed and later being intimate with my wife my mind wanders and she becomes the man and I am the woman.

[Anthony Simon]

Don't try and over lay your real self because of a wont just try and under stand who you are then build on that, allways go back to is this...... Really who I am...... or am I trying be some one im not because I wont to be that other person, look at your self from this side ...

I thought Noeleena's post was very good as a whole, but this was the bit that went home. Being a CD tends to cut you off from people, but my conclusion lately has been that - by alienating myself from my self, because of preconceptions about who I ought to be - I become even more alone.

[Stephanie M]

[quote="Anthony Simon
I thought Noeleena's post was very good as a whole, but this was the bit that went home. Being a CD tends to cut you off from people, but my conclusion lately has been that - by alienating myself from my self, because of preconceptions about who I ought to be - I become even more alone.[/quote]

So true because we live lives that we have to keep secret we do tend to cut ourselves off from the rest of the world.

[Anne Bonny]

Hum...I am glad the thought was interesting enough to elicit some comment. It is interesting to see what others think. My personality is fixed in place. Our emotions sway, moods come and go.... I never try to act a part, effect a voice, or try to move in a way that is unnatural for myself. I can only be who I am. I believe in being my authentic self. What I was commenting on are things that are already inside of me, true labeling them "feminine" ... I suppose is incorrect men and women experience many of the same things inside. I do like many of the same things women do and I have always enjoyed and preferred being with and around women. I think when Anne is around I like these things a little more...I am a little softer in my mood and feel these things a little more.

[Stephanie M]

Hum...I am glad the thought was interesting enough to elicit some comment. It is interesting to see what others think. My personality is fixed in place. Our emotions sway, moods come and go.... I never try to act a part, effect a voice, or try to move in a way that is unnatural for myself..

I agree with that, I'm the same way. Unless I plan on going out in public I don't really wan to change my voice etc.

[Victoria K.]

It is all about being yourself! that's the way to be in my opinion.I feel more comfortable and happy being around a woman because i can relate better with them.

[Stephanie M]

I too usually feel more comfortable around women than men.

[Noeleena]

Hi,

Just got home from another good night of banding concert if you like in front of about 1500 people I think more came .
its our year end xmas in the Park in Waimate where I live, our Band is from Oamaru 1/2 an hour away ,
so they were in our county my turf and that means I know a lot of people so before we played I was allways talking to friends and others I know so our band would have seen I do really do know many people here so that just adds to how they see me and not just at concerts and practice you see what im saying about being real,

We have friends and do they really know us or just what you wont them to see a little or nothing or an open door, im an open door ,

as our band was arriving I made sure they knew where I was so I could get them together in one place ready for our start for playing so I do have different roles to play and I need to know what where and how to have details ready, just part of our lives as a band and it involves many other.s who I know,and we were in uniform so we do stand out,

Clothes , some will say just by putting some clothes on they change , so the clothes become the key to inact that change or take on another personer = likeness of some one else wether real or immagninary. okay then what if you just dressed and did not try to be someone else and just be you the real person could you still do that, don't use an other name just your birth name in other words be transparent = open about your self . would you be more accepted .

I was talking with a friend and she said being transparent would help more in acceptance instead of hiding and the cover up that many do, plus the lies, interesting,

...noeleena...

[Anthony Simon]

okay then what if you just dressed and did not try to be someone else and just be you the real person could you still do that, don't use an other name just your birth name in other words be transparent = open about your self . would you be more accepted .

I have been making myself more open and transparent with people I already know and like - which is to say letting the more female aspects of myself come into play. That's working well for me. The trouble is people are conservative - and to see me in a dress (say) would just be such a shock that would profoundly change their view of me (not in a good way, if my instincts are right).