Crossdressers-Haven.com

It is awful for the Trans..also for those like myself who are gender fluid... and others because society resists and denies. We cannot help being who we are. It means a lifetime of hiding and holding it in...we are left to figure it out by ourselves and society refuses to even try...they only seek to slam us acting on the basis of ignorance, their own insecurities about their own sexuality, and fear which can be vicious and unrelenting. The bible-thumpers are the worst they are truly stupid which is worse than being merely ignorant...yeah tough life.

It is very simple on the individual level, this is just who I happen to be. It is part of who I am. But comes and goes. I have an expansive - sense of who I am...gender is "our sense of who we are"...and mine is inconsistent not fixed drifting from masculine to in-between to feminine. I Have been mostly on the male side of things lately lots going on stress and emotions circumstances do effect it some...but that is just lately and subject to change from daily to on a dime. 

And...I know this is nothing many can accept because they their selves have not experienced it or anything like this ever. So it is not difficult to understand their stubborn rejection of it. However after 60 years, I have been aware of this since about the age of 9...we learn to hide it well....and though forced to hide it conform and fit in. Why 60 years? Because it does not matter what the bible says, what society says, how the self appointed tormentors seek and believe we can be forced to change...as if they can force our brown hair to grow out blonde. We hide and hold it in so that we are able to have a family, friends, an education, work  a place to live, marriage and careers and are ingrained to the gender supposedly corresponding to our sex nevertheless less we suffer and struggle with it all...and are damaged by it because we are not allowed to be who we really are inside. I fluctuate living with half of who I am hidden away having only half of who I am accepted. That is what we are forced to endure. Look at how Jenner has frequently been savaged in repeated feeding frenzies...yet  we are kind, successful people just the same as anyone else. That is oppression. Driven by the religious mainly but also by cultural beliefs about what is believed to be normal. Sex is different than gender...and sexuality. Most do find sex and gender match with sexuality but they are 3 separate things that like a slot Machine can come up grape...lemon...grape...or a number of different combinations. My inner sense of myself...and who I am, my gender varies while the rest is conventional...male...heterosexual (love only women). Half the time I am feminine or masculine on balance.  However there are many that recognize this does not make me a bad person, just different...and...there are many many people out there just like myself all through history...leading upstanding lives. So you can understand our frustration with religion and society who deny who we were born as even being possible... to the stupid...we just need to be pounded into their idea of what is supposed to be normal by whatever means and that this is fair game...hounding, beating, savaging, ridicule, shunning, ostracizing, haranging, whatever. They would drive us out of town or hang us from trees too.  Life for us sucks but does not change who we are inside...60 years so far for me, 65 for Jenner...

People like us are born everyday...we are not made but born as we are. Which is why we have always been. Society and Religion be hanged...we are.

And people need to mind their own business go their own way and stop worrying about how others are...we are all unique. By every other standard in life I have excelled above most in our society but because I am different on this one point and sometimes appear different outwardly the stupid believe they have the right to use any means of vile hatred and and to spew endless venom against us out of their own sexual insecurities, ignorance, and fear. No they don't. Society is changing and evolving and if they do not change with it they will find their selves outcast and rejected just as other bigots from the past have been and roundly rejected. Our day is coming It may not fully happen in my life time but it is coming. 

Hi,

Of cause you know I,ll came at this from a very different angle or from a world of women men not so much and yet I,m going to say I have been talking many men and most are from the US on a number of forums and a big surprise to me is how lovely they have been towards myself as a person and as being so different they have asked a lot of ?s about who I am what I am and the nuts and bolts of what makes me tick it covers sex sexualaity life in general work and being around other people m,y body why is it different do I have male or female organs do I have a womb or not thery have seen my photos and on skype see me and know what I look like , and have said very openly about me appearance as being pretty , cute and other lovely things,

I have fought against accepting,,,,,,, I,m the least bit pretty or cute and hated being told I am I still find it so hard, these men are well versed in live and more so than I in many ways of cause this revolves around how men see us as who we are as female ,

I thought I would be rejected and ridiculed only two so far out of 20 men , so what is this saying .

I have and finding the same here in Kiwi land the men are much the same . so why what the hell has changed nothing I can see I,m not doing any thing to change how I look go back 30 odd years am I more pretty not at all all I know is I have gifts I can use I,v been involved with 1000,s of people and still am or the only thing I can say I,m just one very mature woman who is not a wimp a scater brained twit or a prat , so am I doing something men can see I don't that allows them to look beyond the sight by eyes only detail .

Rejection no seems to me to be so very little it really is nothing at all , being put down no I,m being told very different .

Are men interested in me ....well this is so different and maybe the curse I was under for most of my life has been lifted and gone its a new ball game its exciting new - for sure and I know im still unsure of my self concerning men and yet the doors are open and opening .

What am I trying to say, Being different , has two sides you get one side and go with it or go the other way its in us to be open to our selfs and how we see us or more to home , who we really are and get moving and walk, , you know I,m free im not bound any more and how I interact with people is what I,m about this concerning men is a door open I can retreat or go as the arrow leaves my Bow I can follow and when my target is in sight I,ll hit it where its right on the spot I aimed for and yes I,m an Archer so I know .

Put your self where you need to be
Aim true and hit that spot.
I,m not playing games .
I know what I need .
I,ll get what I need
and i.ll be fulfilled .
GET IT,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

...noeleena...

Huh! Well...times are changing, society is evolving...there was this documentary on our National Geographic Magazine channel called NetGeo...on The Gender Revolution. I noticed it has played several times. But that is not the only story National Geographic in the Magazines carried an issue related to Gender. But that is not the only thing either because Caitlyn Jenner, and the push to allow those who's gender does not match their sex to use the correct restroom facilities, there are trans models, and we are more and more in the news from time to time which raises the issue for consideration and for education by the general public nation wide.

Now on the coasts East and West no doubt there are many more people openly accepting and supportive of us than in what is called the Fly Over Country here. The center of the country is more traditional and in the States Religion where it is taken is taken seriously and that Religion is etched in stone ...Bible says you will burn in the fires of hell!
Truth is the bible does not say that what it really says is men are forbidden from pulling a "Klinger" by way of dodging the draft so they avoid having to go to war to fight, and that is all that it really says according to Jewish scholars.
In the New Testament the Christ sends his men into town to find a man carrying a water jar which is the same as him saying go into town and look for a cross dresser or a man carrying a purse because fetching the water was the exclusive job of women so much so that prisoners of war were forced to fetch water in order to humiliate them in the old testament...

But in the states the interpretation is etched in stone and the preachers will not have any of it!

I am in the deep south called "the bible belt" so the men...and women around where I live are very traditional and the religion resists and bolsters bigotry of our society even more.

But things are changing.

Yes there are men who would be more accepting and depending on where they are from in the states it is more likely if they are from the east or west coast they would be more likely to be accepting, supportive and interested.


I am personally so happy to be where I am I am 60 now, but I am around very accepting women, and I have a very real grasp of who I am.

Here's a bit taken from a conversation with a GF yesterday...

Cannot help how it comes and goes...I just am and I love who I am....my femm self...the male side is so dull.
Being feminine is fun, being masculine is not as much fun for sure.
Men are so limited
My femm self enjoys..pretty things...flirty things....being with other girls....fashion....shopping..jewelry...feelings....support..fun! ...yeah!
I think it is such a wonderful escape valve for me...
I love that I am the way that I am few are this lucky to escape to new world's like instant escape to a new location.
Gaw...I can't imagine it!
I must be manic...endorphins flying...on a high!