Crossdressers-Haven.com

"You definitely have to accept that this will always be part of you and it does not matter so much as why this is. You will worry yourself over and over. I have been thinking about what makes a woman a woman... And in my opinion, it has nothing to do with clothes. Women are strong, tolerate much pain, they look after others, they mother, they shelter, they comfort, they do everything for their young and usually their spouse as well. What we wear has changed so much over the years that I don't believe one style or acessory defines us. We are more than our bodies.

We are more than our clothes.

It is our experience that makes us women, our ability to bring life into the world, our responsibilities to our families... I think it is much more than "we wear pink". I think men can be feminine and dress in any way. And I think women can be masculine... It's just the way things are. I don't think it has to mean more than that really. If I want to wear male clothing or play male roles, I do. It should be like that for you. If you want to wear fem attire and this is not something that will ever change, go with it. I would definitely suggest going to see the psychologist dressed fem. You need to play this out... See how you feel about living openly. To find someone that embraces you, I do believe you have to be open about it or you will attract the wrong woman with the wrong signals. I also think you are basically there, with the earrings and feminine clothing that you already wear in public. You should just be yourself, you don't need permission to do that."

What you wrote on women was so beautiful, I had to save it for myself to read again as a woman on women... Yes, men can be or feel feminine and it leads us not into playing dress up, it is more than that or is for me at least. I have this who I am sense of myself that I am not able to shift away from. I know I am male but I have this connection, identification...it is a sense of being one with women inside and is who I am though reason over rules objectively saying no you are not and you are not. I was not born physically a woman all of that form and function, hormones are very powerful I learned that watching a recent you tube interview of a woman with an androgen secreting tumor she was not aware of that masculinized her, had her shifting to male clothes, having facial hair and even to believing she was gay and to have relations with women. once discovered it took months, a couple years and shifted back as she eased back into feeling female again, dressing more female and becoming interested in who men were and finding attraction for them - so fascinating. I do not believe I have a tumor but it does show that mentally we can be shifted in such a way so that it explains that men who are as I am may be being influenced by some process effecting us in this direction. I do not have a tumor, but do believe there may be something in the make up of my brain that leads me to be and to feel more feminine. I suppose if true it would ease my feeling in such turmoil, and if it is in my make up and nothing can be done about it...why is it so horrible to be as women are inside? I am similar and different from both men and women. It is key to finding a sense of acceptance and peace within if the women around me would be able to acknowledge understand and accept who we are as being as they are even though we know we will never be all of who women are yet our mentality, emotionality and our senses lead us into our softer and feminine state of being. For myself it is more than the clothing, I am not a trans sexual I do not believe...but I do believe whatever is going on inside of who I am brings me close to who they are...I am not dressing up in costume or putting on a mask if it were just that I would not be as I am or it would be purely sexual in nature. I am carried into who I am because it is who I am inside. 

Hi,

Being a woman = being born female from conception , that's the start of for most of those of us who are female , I quess ...knowing... having your hormones in the order that will develope as you grow , and how your body works of cause its not allways that way having hormones that are damaged or grow wrong chemicals in your body I don't mean synthic or man made just your own can fail and cross over and destroy what should be a normal growth pattern and then the results are not normal,

plus a whole host of other detail hidden away not seen by human eye and all going on and some times we don't even know. as we say the can of worm,s is let lose, and we cop it in some form or other,

How we see life how we grow how we live is all dependent on what.... attitude how our body is or governed by other,s or well is upto the person and I quess how they wont to go,

In many ways how my life was going to be was set and I have followed through no ? of what am I or what should do its live it run with it and have a great time and ….Most importaint is just LIVE IT...I never ? nd myself and why should I have , and I quess some wont understand that in being so clear cut so well I know being sure of myself never had to ask any one and I would not have it,s I knew , and that was it, and just got on I did not waste my time in diling dalling around I saw no point or sense to that had I I would have lost out on so much .


In my Navy training there was one detail and you get it right first time , eye,s to the front and you bloody well march ,you are disciplined and you discipline your self you have one way and its forward end of no ? no well nothing , ist los,,,,, is go,


...noeleena...

I faced things too...these feelings inside and attitudes that required me to keep it all hidden inside until I was able to let it out when I was alone as I grew ... and as I learned and matured and came to terms with it all. Would I exchange the life I had, married, two sons, grand children seeing those sons educated and trained and now off beginning their adult lives while I find myself where my parents once were it comes full circle. I recall how I thought about my parents...they were never anything but who they were, my parents people to ask advice of and to seek help if needed and love and reassurance always and now that person is who I am.

Yes, I missed so much not being able to come out and to live my life as a feminine person as a woman... But I suppose some of us are too afraid, and have too little time to think deeply...those last 9-10 years caring for my poor wife, I will never get over her loss! my heart is sad and grieving...have allowed me to find myself on the right track for the rest of my life. I hope I will be attractive to a woman somewhere now that I am able to be who I am openly. That is not some fantasy - I do really want a woman who will want me no matter how I am dressed but who will love me also in feminine attire that matches who I am inside myself quite a lot. With swings of emotion or stress of feeling that others are judging or not on board ...who need or do not like my feminine...I do shift male, at times I am not desiring anything to do with my female self.... I noted a female friend also stating women can be strong...when I am feeling strong I shift to male while my feminine is soft, caring and loving, happy and filled with wonderful emotion. I see this as how things are. I really do hope I can live much more openly and even go out openly with my female husband in terms of our roles which I see as dynamic and shifting so that at times I can be her husband...but I really do want her arm around my waste or holding my hand leading me or turning to embrace and to kiss me because she loves me. Yes I love being able to yield I want to be cherished embraced loved protected and wanted, I do want her to be my champion because I am also a woman...but I am also able to be all of that for her and would desire to be for her as she would be for me...my husband and my love.