Hey girls,
Here is a recent article by Ms. Debbie Hahn...
Thought it might give us all something to think about.
Are You a Man in a Dress?
By Debbie Hahn
At first blush, my opening question might see rather obvious but it
isn't. I've had several encounters in the past couple of weeks that
make me question how many MtF transgenders see themselves and/or
women. I make no bones about it, I see myself as an MtF transsexual
but until I undergo SRS I am an anatomical male wearing a dress. But,
I am not a man in a dress.
Most MtF transgenders will tell you they want to emulate woman. They
want the freedom to dress and act as a woman. Many will tell you that
they're a woman trapped in a man's body and they want to release the
inner woman. Last week I received an email from an MtF internet
sorority sister, it said, "Your last email contained a virus - jerk."
It had an automatically added signature, "Love and Kisses, (name)." I
was initially swept-away by the ultra-feminine touch of love and
kisses. It made me feel all warm and cozy inside...NOT! Don't get me
wrong, I do appreciate someone telling me that I might have a virus
on my computer but, why in the world would this sorority sister call
me a jerk. Wouldn't a woman be kinder and more caring? Wouldn't
a "sister" behave in a more compassionate manner? This brute was
a "man in a dress;" someone who dresses like a woman but doesn't act
as one.
Another incident occurred at the last support group meeting I
attended. After the meeting, we have to clean-up the dishes and
straighten-up the room. There were a large number of members who sat
there and watched a 4-5 of us clean. Think back to the last mixed
picnic or social gathering you attended; I'm willing to bet my next
paycheck that the majority of men sat chatting while the majority of
the women cleaned. I'll take it one step further, I'm positive that
the majority of the women made and served the food to the men. Okay I
understand the societal traditions that women clean and cook because
men are the breadwinners. But, there is no excuse for MtF
transgenders who sit on their haunches while others clean-up after
the meeting. Again, they are nothing more than a "man in a dress."
Emulating a woman is more than dressing in feminine clothing. It is
more than dressing in tight short skirts and wearing 5" heels. In
fact, I know very few genetic woman who act and dress like the
majority transgenders that attend my support group meeting or are
members of my web-based sorority. I am not naive and I realize that
not all women share the same qualities, but the majority of women are
loving people. They're caregivers, soft-spoken and concerned about
other people's feelings. Women are wonderful and unique. It is those
qualities that entice many MtF transgenders, because we desire to
free ourselves from the male shackles of no feelings and emotions.
Yet when given the opportunity, many of us don't behave as woman. We
behave as a man in a dress.
I suggest that each of us, look deep into our heart and ask
ourselves, why am I a transgender? What is missing from my life? What
am I looking for? What feminine traits do I desire? I think that
intimate reflection will discover that clothing or dressing like a
woman isn't your overall goal. It is not the clothing itself that
fulfills your needs, but the way dressing frees your spirit and
allows your softness to manifest itself. For many, this is the
essence of a woman. Last month I asked the question, what type of
woman are you? This month I ask the question, what type of
transgender are you? Is your goal to look like a woman or behave like
a woman? In other words, is being a woman just about feeling pretty
and feminine or is it an attitude, a belief, or a the way you treat
and respond to people. So, I suggest you take a tip from the US Army
and next time you dress..."Be all you can be!" Women are wonderful
role models...instead of just dressing like one; try behaving as one.
), then they are not crossdressing. If they wear it in an effort to demonstrate their identity, then they are xdressing.
