what to do when things go wrong

[Kristen]

Girls, First I had the best time today. I first went to Macdonalds, dressed in tight jeans, boots, and a black sweater, a grayish long wig. I then tried to find a thrift store in Denver, Gave up looking, started back for home, but I had to pee really bad, ( I had shaved at 7:00 am it was now 3:00pm, feared I had a bad shadow), thought I was going to wet myself , I stopped at a Carl"s jR, (Hardee's for eastern folks). I went into the womens room for the first time, there was 7-8 year od with her Mom. No problems, I wrestled with my clothes , staightening my hair in the mirror and applied a little powder. Feeling confident, I then went to a Salvation Army and found the cutest stretch jeans and Burgandy turtleneck sweater. Their was an accident involving 3 cars cops eveywhereas I wnet in the store. Feeling very confident I went to the local ARC, been there many times in Drab, 1st time enfemmed, I LOCKED MY KEYS IN MY CAR!!!! I was so embarrased I had to go into the store ,I asked for tape nd cardboard, almost had it but really needed double stick tape. Then I asked for a phone to use, there was no phone book, had to wait at least 20 minutes for them to locate one, Everyone was so very nice too, no strange looks , just polite smiles. I got a locksmith , and finally got ito my car after frezzing outside for 30 mins waiting. he said 10 minutes. What an excercise in trying to be fem when I wanted to take a rock break a window. I did buy a nice blue suede jacket to stay warm while I was trying to get the door opened. It was a kick. I had fun, people were asking me on their way out if they could assist me. I polietly told them i had locksmith on the way. Turned out to be very Fun, although it was cold out there in just a sweater, then I bought the jacket.
Anyone had similar expierences????.....Kristen

[Merinda]

Thats cool , turning a bad situation into a fun event.

I've always taken a spare set of car keys with me ( just incase )

Well done Kristen

[Beauty]

Hi Kristen,

Wow! What a wild event!

All you brave and smart people are going out dressed as responsible and well dressed women. I think it's great! I love hearing stories like yours and I don't think saying thank you really expresses how much gratitude I really feel.

:note to self about keys:

Congrats for the successful outing Kristen!

Beauty

[Jadeanne]

Kristen,

Congratulations on keeping your wits about you and and trning what could have been a very bad time into a positive experience.

Thanks for sharing.

Jadeanne

[Genifer Teal]

Sorry to hear about your interseting day. Here are two bad days I had coming home from New York City dressed.

One night after being out very late in NYC (clubbing till 4am) I had an accident at 5am after dropping my girl friend off on the way home. The car was not damaged beyond driving but bad enough to need to call a cop. It wasn't my fault the taxi turned into me. So there I was waiting for an hour for a cop to arrive. My makeup was dripping off my face, I was wearing a very short skirt, and I was barefoot. I took my heels of to tone down my look.

When the cops arrived I gave them my information and they never really said anything. They might have had a laugh when chatting with the taxi driver (who btw never said much at all to me). Nothing bad was said to me by the cops. I think the cab driver was a little afraid of me since I was very upset he drove into me. Did I mention I am over 6 feet tall? It was after 6 am and daylite when I was finally able to head home. I can only imagine what a site I was.

On a better note, I got hit on twice earlier that night. :-)

A second time, only a few weeks later, driving in that same area, my car died because of a dead battery. Such luck right? Fortunately I was able to park the car leaglly before it couldn't move. This was not the greatest (safest) area. I had to walk a few blocks and wait a while to find a cab.
Once I did, I learned that if the cab leaves the city limits, you have to pay double the fare. I live 4 miles out of the city. I tried to bribe the driver to take me the rest of the way for less.

Instead of paying what would have been close to 80 bucks (for the complete ride home - 40 x 2), I got out at the furthest point I could paying only $31. He got no tip cause that was all I had on me.

At this point it was a little after 4am (bars close at 4). Some people were just leaving a bar on the corner where the cab let me off. I got the nuber of a cab company from them and was able to call a local cab to take me home (for only $6 more - much better than doubling $40). I then walked 1 block to a cash machine for more money.

I had to wait more than 30 min and make several calls before that cab arrived. All the while, I was dressed similar to the way described above, standing near the street to watch for the cab. At the time, I wasn't overly concerned about how I looked. Stuff happens beyond your control, and you just have to deal with it. BTW, I was able to go back the next day with a charged battery and get the car home.

The lesson learned from all this? I now mustered up the courage to always take the train to NYC. My biggest concern with traveling the Rail Road is that I work for them and could easily run into a conductor or someone else I know. Also, I get to deal with a bunch of drunk 21-25 year olds. Fortunatly, they don't have much to say.

I like to look at the bright side of all this. I got home safely both nites and that is the most important part (along with getting hit on twice!). :-)

Hugs - Genifer

[DonnaT]

I think I would have learned to keep a change of clothes in the car?

[Beauty]

Hi Geniffer,

Wow! Those were two very wild adventures. It sounds like you made it out a better and wiser person.

The first one you sounded like you handled really well for a first time, "OMG!" event. The second one you sounded much wiser and I think others can learn from what happened to you.

I think you're very brave for taking the train too. I admire people who go out and express themselves so much. You're totally a femme bot, so I don't think anyone at work will ever spot you.

Stef told me something the other day when I was talking with her that was so wise! She was talking some sense into me (regarding my fears about going out and being spotted by someone who knows me). She said when you're dressed you don't look anything close to the same as you do as a male, so no one is looking at you the same way in a crowded place with lots of people. I'd never thought of that. I kind of thought of someone seeing me and then automatically drawing a line to me, but Stef is right. Unless you've told someone about you dressing it's very unlikely that if they make eye contact with you for a second they'll piece it together with who you are. I think you'll be fine on the train and no one will spot you.

Thanks for sharing your story and reviving this thread. I hope others post their stories like yours here too.

Beauty

[Alexandra]

change of clothes in the car? oddly enough, I USED to do that, but lately I don't bother . I do however, have a hide-a-key.

[Genifer Teal]

You're totally a femme bot, so I don't think anyone at work will ever spot you.

Beauty, thanks for your compliments above. Since May I have been letting my real hair grow. I must say, my first time without a wig, I knew immediately I'd never wear one again. It is great to feel so natural. I could go on but that would require a new thread.

My point to this comment is that with my short hair and natural color, I do have a lot better chance of being recognized. BTW, I didn't mention if I show my work ID, the ride is free. That took guts the first time. Sure, the safe thing to do is to buy a ticket, but the cost adds up quickly. Fortunately they never look closely at our ID.

One time a female conductor chatted with Lorna and I for a minute and she told us that she used to be a dancer in a "gentleman's" club. It was surprising and cool that she would come right out and reveal something like that.

The bottom line is - you don't meet many people in the closet. It's good to be out.

Hugs - Genifer

Here are 2 pics showing my hair growth. One in May when I first took off the wig (and never looked back), and one from New Year's Eve. It is slow growing, but I'm making progress!

May: http://gencd.no-ip.org:12300/P5210059sig.jpg
Dec31: http://gencd.no-ip.org:12300/P050101014Sig.jpg

[Elizabeth]

Hi girls,

Beauty wrote:

She said when you're dressed you don't look anything close to the same as you do as a male, so no one is looking at you the same way in a crowded place with lots of people. I'd never thought of that. I kind of thought of someone seeing me and then automatically drawing a line to me, but Stef is right. Unless you've told someone about you dressing it's very unlikely that if they make eye contact with you for a second they'll piece it together with who you are.

This is so true. Recently in the grocery store I seen my old neighbor. She looked right at me, and had this look on her face like I looked familiar, but did not know from where. I lived across the street from this woman for three years, and spoke to her many times. She and her husband were the leaders of the "neighborhood watch" which means they are busy bodies. So I finally approached her and told her who I was, and she was totally surprised.

To me, I look pretty much the same in makeup or out of makeup, but I have been seeing me for 43 years.



The picture on the left is me yesterday, the picture on the right is me just after getting home from work right before I retired 2 years ago, so that is how my coworkers would have seen me.

To me its pretty obvious, but to someone who really don't have a reason to have my facial features memorized, it may not be so easy.

Love always.
Elizabeth

[DonnaT]

I wouldn't even have said brother and sister, Elizabeth!

[Beauty]

You're totally a femme bot, so I don't think anyone at work will ever spot you.

Beauty, thanks for your compliments above. Since May I have been letting my real hair grow. I must say, my first time without a wig, I knew immediately I'd never wear one again. It is great to feel so natural. I could go on but that would require a new thread.

My point to this comment is that with my short hair and natural color, I do have a lot better chance of being recognized. BTW, I didn't mention if I show my work ID, the ride is free. That took guts the first time. Sure, the safe thing to do is to buy a ticket, but the cost adds up quickly. Fortunately they never look closely at our ID.

One time a female conductor chatted with Lorna and I for a minute and she told us that she used to be a dancer in a "gentleman's" club. It was surprising and cool that she would come right out and reveal something like that.

The bottom line is - you don't meet many people in the closet. It's good to be out.

Hugs - Genifer

Here are 2 pics showing my hair growth. One in May when I first took off the wig (and never looked back), and one from New Year's Eve. It is slow growing, but I'm making progress!

May: http://gencd.no-ip.org:12300/P5210059sig.jpg
Dec31: http://gencd.no-ip.org:12300/P050101014Sig.jpg

Hi again Genifer,

Wow! You look great and your hair looks fantastic too!! Kudos for letting it grow out!!

I understand now about the train ride being a little bit more daring since you don't really wear your hair. I think Elizabeth's illustration kind of shows that even with your own hair people may not recognize you, but you're right about wearing a wig. It's even less noticeable if you do that and you are wearing your own hair now (again it looks great!) I was thinking you were wearing one and that's why I said use Stef's rules.

Thank you for responding to me so quickly!


Elizabeth,

That's is quite a difference. I think it's wonderful that you decided to go up to your old neighbor and say hello even though she didn't know it was you. That was a great story. I agree with Donna. Looking at those photos I wouldn't have even guessed you were related to each other. You look so happy in your pictures!!!

Beauty

[Anne]

Elizabeth, dear, as Billy Crystal said: "You look mahvelous!"

Keep up the positive attitude! Yours, Anne

[Anita]

Elizabeth--
I do like that picture on the left, from seeing it as the avatar. It does look like you're happy.

Genifer--
That's a great look, with your own hair. I've been a lot happier letting my own hair grow out. Ponytail it for boy days, and let it down for girl days.

As far as emergencies go, I used to also carry boots and a pair of coveralls, but I got tired of that. I haven't needed them, but I have to say that dealing with any kind of car trouble when wearing heels would be a pain.

One of my fulltime gal friends told this story last night. Her son's car broke down near downtown Oakland--not a great location. He had some mechanical knowledge, but no tools, and he was talking with some of the neighborhood guys while waiting for my friend, Michelle, to arrive.

She gets there, and he introduces her as his "mom." Michelle starts directing him, putting him through the paces--did you check this, what about that, now try this. She gets the car going, and starts to leave. One of the neighborhood guys says, "Man, your mom sure knows a lot about cars!" Yeah, thought Michelle, spend 45 years of your life as a guy, and you pick up some tricks here and there. She's very passable, and has the voice down well.

[Beauty]

Hi Anita,

Great story! I think it's cool for two reasons. One that she was comfy enough to come out and help her son and two because her son accepted her for who she is. I think that's wonderful.

Thank you for posting that Anita.

Beauty