A Sister .....

[Aislin]

This may take a bit so hunker down and sit a spell.

I work at a call center. I worked today when in a different project there arose a cross dressing issue. Someone had come to work dressed. Someone who had not done this before. A lot of folks just flat freaked out. They would not sit beside her, would not sit in the same bay, were generally a bunch of friggin A****. The other shoe...She is more than 50% pre-op and on her way to happieness.

Do I know her? Not yet. Once I do find out her name how do I acknowledge the change in a loving way? I am thinking a subtle note to let her know that some of us give a shat, and that not every one is a fool. For it may result in putting my arse on the line to acknowledge her choice.

I realize that this is an opportunity to climb off my pearch and acknowledge anothers intestinal fortitude. I however am afraid of the backlash.

I welcome your thoughts and the free exchange of information.

[Loretta Ann]

Hi Aislin,

How about simply (discretely) just saying something (to her) like, I liked (or like) your dress or what ever she was or is wearing at the present time? And perhaps give her a big smile?

Love Darlene.

[Jan W]

Dear Aislin,

Introduce yourself and let her know she has at least one friend at work. Let the TG part come later.

Really cool people don't care what another person's pursuasion is only if they are a good person. Show your workmates how cool you are!

Please let us know how you eventually decide to handle it.

Love,

Jan

[DonnaT]

Aislin

I guess it's not really as simple as walking up a sitting with her at lunch, unless you are comfortable with your own manhood. You'll probably worry that others will think you're gay for talking to "that" person.

Please don't let what others think influence your good intensions. She's going to need a friend. Your firstt step may give others the courage to also show friendship.

So, just walk up and sit with her. Tell her she has your support.

[Joselle]

Hi Aislin


Personally I would walk right up to her and introduce myself just to let her know she has a friend regardless of what her other ignorant coworkers think. Take the risk and don't let anyone intimidate you.....she is worth it.


Joselle

[Virginia]

Joselle, said it best, I think! She is worth knowing! She has the guts to follow her instincts and that is a rare commidity nowadays!!!! You can make a lifelong friend - go for it!!
Virginia

[Sinjoy(SO)]

Dear Aislin,

Everyone needs a little encouragement now and then. You don't have to give your life story right away, or ever for that matter. Just a friendly smile or an invite for coffee after work. That way, you don't have to worry what others may say. You obviously feel you should say something, so, do it!! You may even make a new friend. And I'm sure she will understand your candor. Good luck and keep us posted!

Sinjoy(so)

[Sally]

Hi Aislin,

Unless anyone has been through the experience this person to whom you're referring is currently going through, then I assure you that words would never truly paint a picture of the experience and a friendly face or word at this point in time may mean more to this person than winning the lottery.

I can well understand your position and your need to protect yourself and avoid any backlash as to your own work situation, but in a quieter time away from prying eyes and ears if you simply give her a smile and say something along the lines of ' Have a lovely day sister' or whatever fits the time, mood and place, it may break the ice for you both. The word 'sister' will mean everything to this person and tell it's own story to her. Right now she either needs a friend more than ever before in her life or on the other hand she may have prepared herself and steeled herself against the backlash she knew would come as a result of her actions at work. Some people in these situations just throw up a wall around themselves and lock everyone out, but until you test it you won't know. What I do in these situations is ' knock on the door' so to speak and if the other person wants to 'open it' then that's up to them, it can be a delicate time in a persons life but I find the subtle approach with the word 'sister' thrown in, followed by taking a step back and leaving the next step to the other person usually has rewarding results.

I'll be most interested to see what develops, both for her situation at work and if a friendship develops between you both.

Kind Regards,

Sally.

[SharonRose]

Aislin,

I agree with what Jan and Sinjoy have said.

Giving support to this person will mean the world to her.

I think you should keep it about her at first, and just let her know you are a friend.


Sharon Rose

[Absaroka]

I agree with what has been said. You can be friednly and accpeting to her and see how that works and then reveal stuff about yourself as you feel comfortable with it. If she is being shummed by other workers she probably will be thakful for support regardless of anything else.

Andrea

[Aislin]

Thanks for the help.

As soon as I know for sure who she is I'll step up and say something positive. I don't know who she is. I must be slipping cause I'm not sure if I can tell. May be a wonderful candor I can share. i'll keep you posted.

Thanks for all the wonderful support. I believe that the cost will be worth the action no matter what happens. She may even showup here!!!

[Ms Jane]

Girls I agree with what you are saying. To begin with doesn't a smile and a friendly "hi" say a lot? By the way Aislin sounds like you are someone worth knowing as well. Good luck Jane.

[Jan W]

Dear Aislin,

Have been following this thread with interest but cannot for the life of me settle on one pronounciation for Aislin!

Please help by giving it phonetically.

Sorry to sound so ditzy,

Love,

Jan

[DonnaT]

Jan,

Aislin (sounds like Ays-lynn or Ash-lin) Means "dream" or "vision" in Irish Gaelic.

[Aislin]

DonnaT - I am amazed how much you know. posting several threads and I agree every time. When I don't you will know.

I prefer more to the Ays_lin side of the house. Just sounden more` better to me.

I believe I am going to be saying something to patsy soon. She had tuesday and wednesday off while I have thursday and friday off. The next opportunity comes on Saturday.

It felt so good to walk out to the truck get in and drive 35 miles for a little coffee. Wearing sandals, jeans,lacy top. Then I changed my top to a mens shirt and filled out an application for a job in a job service. Not only a rush but more fun than I should probably have. Especially while "Sportin' a Full Salt-n-Peppa Beard"

Enjoy y'all, I'll post back after saturday.