Crossdressers-Haven.com

** As I am still unsure about some of the posting etiquette here, this post may offend some. It is strictly unintentional. Please forgive me. **

Have you ever had occasion to notice whether your desire to dress goes down after sex?

I'm not trying to step on anyone's toes, but this is a direct issue for me. I'll try and explain...

My SO and I only have sex about ever 2 to 3 months. Often, this is not intercourse but simply oral and/or touching only. In between times I am left to "fend for myself", and I find that fantasy helps a lot.

Well, obviously (to me, anyway) those fantasies are about being dressed up. And once it starts, the desire to dress continues to grow. And I suppose I'm not really saying it isn't there all the time, but it is more pronounced.

But I also see a drastic lessening, of the need to dress, after sex. Sometimes even after the act of orgasm, in whatever context. So much so that I could have spent all day planning on what I would wear the next day - garters, camisole, etc. - and then when I go to get dressed, I have no inclination to put any of it on. (Other than my panties. That's all I got. )

I don't perceive mine to be as straight-forward an issue as Ridge's post, because I recognize that I still have desires to dress, regardless. I was just wondering if anyone else notices a lessening affect, after....

Sorry about this. Sometimes I get issues in my head and I just have to try and talk them out.

Hugs.

Hey Marilyn,
I can't say for sure if I ever did. I can remember a while back when I was more secretive about my dressing; I would dress (usually in lingerie) and most times get excited. This usually led to masturbation. I say most times, because sometimes I would dress just for the sensuous feel. And those times never led to anything sexual. But I honestly can't say if my desire to dress was lessened in any way by having sex.
Sorry, not much help.
Hmmm, maybe i'll have to do more research on this subject.

Kyra

Ummm, would that be "hands on" research, Kyra?

To answer Marilyn's question: In my case, yes, the desire to dress lessens after sex. This is why I consider my CDing to be sexually motivated to a large extent. For a while, back in the 90s, I "cut loose" from society and just wandered the country, hitchhiking, and working odd jobs, basically became a drifter. For about eight months I had no sex life at all (no, ahem, "auto-eroticism" nor even just fantasies); I was a hardcore celibate. Not once during those eight months did the thought of crossdressing pop into my mind.

When I'm partnered, though (not the case at the moment), I have sex fairly often so my CDing becomes sort of "muted," in a way, less urgent. It's still very much a part of my sex life, but I've had days (quite a few, actually) where I didn't particularly feel like dressing but sort of had to anyway, simply because it had become so much an essential ingredient of our sex life. Plus, how can I say this? I'm usually, uh, "deferential" to my SO's wishes in the matter of sex; many of the women I've known have more often been the initiator than I ever was. And, well, I'm okay with that. (Especially if she is!)

Love,
Christina

Marilyn wrote:I also see a drastic lessening, of the need to dress, after sex

But this applies to just about everything. After sex you just want to stay there and cuddle with the one you love.

So true, so true. Post-O cuddling is the best!