Coping For Me

[Jamie Sue]

First off I would like and need to apologize for my absence lately, I continue with my dilemma with my wife. Things seem to be going along ok but I’m not sure. After my last post I was hopeful that she would come out and visit the site, however that was not to be. She closed off a little to me and we had a couple of discussions about the whole idea and it went nowhere. I’m glad that she knows what’s going on with me, however, her mind set seems to be, what I don’t know or see is better. It’s so hard on her, I know, but it’s hard on me too! I have be reading most of the posts here and I guess my life follows most of what has already been discussed. The ups and downs, more downs then ups, the feeling of isolation and what to do or expect next. I understand that this is going to be a long road and I need the strength to see it through, but at times it’s hard. I feel so alone sometimes until I come and read what all of you write and I cry some and see that I’m not the only one on the planet that has these issues going on. Thanks for the support you give me (whether you know it or not) everyday, even though I do not post all of the time. I feel bad at times, I sit back and say nothing to some of the people that post, because I’m going thru the same thing, but I feel I can’t help with my words and I wait to see what wisdom comes from the people that have seen it all or have gone through it all ready. The SO’s And GG’s are great about support for both sides and all you gals out there are so open and supportive as well. I read it all. I hope that my road will bring my wife and I to open up and see what you all know all ready, CD’ing is not a bad thing, it’s just another part of life’s wonders.

[Georgia(SO)]

Jamie Sue,

I'm sorry that it's been difficult for you and glad that you are able to find support here. These people are great, aren't they?

Hang in there...

-georgia(so)

[DonnaT]

Hang in there Jamie. She's only known for a few months now, and you know it takes many CDs years to come to some degree of self acceptance. So, give her time.

The good news, as I read it, is that she hasn't tried to stop your CDing.

Try not to continually bring it up in conversation in order for her to talk more about what she's feeling. Instead, every once in a while, try bringing it up, or try letting her see some aspect of your CDing so she'll want to talk about it. Small steps.

[Jamie Sue]

Donna T,

Thank you for your post, I will tell you that my mind says yes, show her some part of me, but my heart is not so willing. I'm so afraid of turning her away from me. I know her so well, yet not so sure how she would react. I do some little things like wear my VS underwear under my shorts, and I have gone as far as wearing a matching pair of underwear and bra under my t-shirt and shorts to bed at night ( I'm not brave and that is my normal wear to bed). Has see noticed? Not sure, maybe, I like she has, I try not to push to hard. My problem is how to bring the subject up without creating a unconfortable situation for both of us. I'm still dealing will all of this myself. All I want is exceptance from her. I just know that there will be a price to pay for that and I'm afraid of what that price will be. I guess little steps are the best answer to a question that I cannot answer just now.

Love all of you,
Jamie Sue

[Jamie Sue]

Georgia(SO)

I agree with you 100%, all of the people here have shown me that people do care and listen. The only support I have at this moment is on this forum. I read it almost every day, gaining so much insight into what I feel, what I can expect not only for me but my SO also. So many of the post here fit my life so far.

Love Always

Jamie Sue

[KimberlyS]

Jamie, first off, no need to apologize as we have all been there. IMHO this is a support forum and we take we feel we need or can take at the time, and hopefully at some point we all can give back something. Some day you will feel confident to post more. But for now even a short post once in a while that you can relate some times helps others.

Good luck and hang in there.

KimberlyS - CD

[Jamie Sue]

Thank you KimberlyS for your support, I need all I can get.

Love Jamie Sue