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Just when you get your head together

Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 3:20 pm
by Merinda
Hi girls ,

On Sunday I took my son for a trip on a steam train , we had an enjoyable day taking photos and talking to people who have the same interests in trains.
I felt at home amongst the railfans and I felt a sense of contentment in who I am.

Then it changed

A woman walked onto the platform wearing a short skirt with black tights and when I looked at her my mood suddenly changed to - -

- Jellousy
- Discontent
- isolated
- reconciliation that I can never be free of dressing in girls cloths.

Crossdressing was the furtherest thing from my mind and then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

Does this sort of thing happen to you ???? #-o

Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 5:34 pm
by Stephanie W
Don't sweat it Merinda, I think most of us have experienced that at sometime or another. I know I have. For me, a sexy outfit will distract me every time, even though cding might be the furthest thing from my mind too. That reality check will usually leave me lamenting how lucky she is and wishing I was wearing it. **sigh** No jealousy though - just plain ol' envy and a quiet (contented) resignation of what I am. (OOOO)

Stephanie

Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 8:59 pm
by CJ
Hi all,

Merinda,

This happens to me, too. Not very often, but often enough for it to be distracting sometimes. The funny thing is, whenever this happens to me, I feel a (tiny) voice piping up in my head, saying something like "No! No! No! You're supposed to be wondering what it's like to be with her, not to be in her clothes or in her skin!" I can't ever shut this voice up when it nags me like that. Just goes to show that I still have a long way to go before I'm totally at ease with who I am (and with what I want, I guess).

Like Stephanie says, Merinda, don't sweat it too much. This feeling, just like hunger, comes and goes. It, too, shall pass.

Love,
CJ

Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 9:08 pm
by Virginia
Merinda,
Yes, I have had that same emotion and I have even had it at the club I go to sometimes as I see my sisters there who have "what it takes" and some are in the transition phase. They dress appropriately, jeans and t-shirt and sandles and they look so good.
When I am out and I see a nicely dressed GG, what it does for me is challenge me! I think to myself if I want to pass and look that good - proper skin care, diet and exercise, poise, grace, the walk, pride! It just makes me want to work at it even harder!
Keep the faith darlin, your doing good!
Virginia

Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 9:58 pm
by Gaven McLaren
I have that all the time. I will be doing some mondain task (shopping for food, driving) and I will see someone and think damn I love that outfit. Not she is cute. That will some times come later (if she is cute).

Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2006 10:16 pm
by DonnaT
Guity as well. :mrgreen:

Posted: Wed Jun 28, 2006 2:32 am
by Merinda
Stephanie W wrote: That reality check will usually leave me lamenting how lucky she is and wishing I was wearing it. **sigh** No jealousy though - just plain ol' envy

Stephanie
Yeah "envy" is probably a better term



The interesting point in all this is the fact that a good looking woman in tight jeans will have the nomal attracting effect on me in the same way as any other man would feel , if the woman wears a short skirt & tights then I want to BE her rather than be with her.
There were many woman on the steam trip that were attractive but it took only one woman wearing the correct combination in her clothing choice to unlock the CD doorway in my mind.

Posted: Wed Jun 28, 2006 7:22 am
by Lydia
Enmy is absolutely right.

Wow !! All your comments and feelings really expressed my own.

I just returned from a week in Vancouver WA. Much younger population than we have in Sarasota FL. Looking at those lovely young girls made me wish I could be like that.

BTW, my SO and I did a lot of wine tasting in the Hood River area and also in Willamete Valley. With new regulations in Florida, we can now import wines, but they have to be purchased in person - not on line.

No chance for dressing for me, but I did envy the girls.

Hugs,

Lydia

Posted: Wed Jun 28, 2006 9:29 am
by KimberlyS
Merinda wrote: but it took only one woman wearing the correct combination in her clothing choice to unlock the CD doorway in my mind.
Merinda, ah yes I am with you there. I can go days with seeing people. And then one person/outfit will just jump out and get my attention and I will be daydreaming some CDing thought.

KimberlyS-CD

Posted: Wed Jun 28, 2006 11:33 am
by Anita
Hi Merinda--
Yes, it has happened to me. It is usually along the lines of, "I will never look as good as HER," and it really gets to me, on those days. It is certainly not like that all the time, but neither is your situation.

I will say, though, that I had much more painful feelings when I was younger, and did not know I had a feminine side. I would see an attractive woman that just seemed "right" in so many ways, and I would be hit with an overwhelming feeling of longing, desire, enjoyment, and pain, all in one instant. I'm sure most of you know the kind of feeling I'm talking about. It is not really that pleasant, overall, because you have no connection with this woman at all--she's someone you're seeing in front of you.

After I discovered that I could "become" a woman of sorts, then this feeling was no longer so painful. I know that I have access to the qualities that I'm seeing in her, and that is the plus side of being TG.

Posted: Wed Jun 28, 2006 10:17 pm
by Bernice
Merinda,

Yes of course, been there, felt that same way. Right now I have a temp job at a big company with a "business casual" dress code. Except here, oddly, a great many women dress very nicely. Lots of people to envy.

Hugs,

Bernice

Posted: Thu Jun 29, 2006 4:03 am
by Merinda
All crossdressers have their own unique reasons for crossdressing , everyone is different and all of us have different views & needs .
The views expressed in this topic have found a common thread with all of us. ((G))