Crossdressers-Haven.com

Hello all,

I hope your all well and in fine spirits.
I know that with crossdressing there is always the desire.
Some of you try not to dress,by going through the purging phase of getting rid of all your clothing etc a very expensive action to take.

I would like to know how you think your life would be if you did'nt dress, or could'nt dress.
My own husband has terrible mood swings ,he can get extremely angry over the silliest of things and he also gets very frustrated.These moods are felt by all,I'm the only one who know's why, however the kids do not and sometimes they are left wondering what the hell is up with dad.

So I need you to put your femme aside,wonder what your life would be like without her,how do you think you would cope with general relationships etc.
Remember put your femme aside.

Goodluck hugs Penni

I have put this topic on our site aswell so it will be interesting to see the responces.

In a word:

Miserable.

Lydia

Penni

Seeing as I could never imagine not being transgendered now, that's a hard question to answer. I can only assume that I'd be downright miserable if an integral part of me couldn't be expressed - EVER! That's kind of how I felt growing up when I had to keep the thing secret from the world and daren't do it too often in case I was found out. I remember never being totally happy than when I was dressed. I never knew why I felt this way but human nature being what it is, if it felt good, why would I want to stop doing it?

Nowadays, anytime I'm not able to dress when the mood strikes, it can bring about the kinds of emotions your hubby (and many of us here) experience, albeit to a much lesser extent. Thankfully though, it's usually short lived and then I can make time for Stephanie when I need to - if only to play catchup.

Stephanie

Penni SO wrote:I need you to put your femme aside,wonder what your life would be like without her,how do you think you would cope with general relationships etc.
Remember put your femme aside.

I reckon I would cope just fine, since I don't utilize my fem side in general relationships anyway.

Penni SO wrote:I would like to know how you think your life would be if you . . . did'nt dress.

If i didn't dress, and had no fem side, I think my life would be just fine. Probably better in fact, since this is the basis of most of my wife's frustrations.

Penni SO wrote:I would like to know how you think your life would be if you . . . could'nt dress.

That's a horse of a different color, because one can't put the fem side aside, as the question requires a fem side as a basis.

Been there, couldn't handle it. Took to lying and hiding things from my wife.

I don't recall being miserable or moody. But that's probably because when the need became too great to bear, I dressed in secret.

Wow.... deep questions.

If I didn't have the desire, certainly I wouldn't miss it. And, yes, my life would prob be a little easier.

I do understand the moodiness when not able to dress. I don't think I get real moody, but I do get a little edgy. Things bother me that I know wouldn't if I could dress regularly.

If I couldn't ever again dress..... geez....
I'm not sure how to answer that one. I know my life would be VERY sad indeed! I just don't know how I could or would handle that one at all.

Well for me, it is pretty easy! Virginia is me and I am Virginia. The dressing and going out is nice and I enjoy it, but if I could not dress, Virginia's influence on my life and those that "we" touch would not change. She is such a part of my every action, reaction and life it would hurt her not being able to express herself physically, but she would continue to express herself in "our" actions!
Virginia

My ex forced me to put aside my femme side for most of our marriage, which is ironic, since she helped to foster its development in the earliest days of our relationship. During those years I felt like the most miserable being alive, though I have since come to find that there are a multitude in that condition.

My consensus is this: Never again! I will grant you this: there are a few activities in my life which give me pleasure that do not strictly involve my being trans. I might get cut off from some of them if my situation morphs into full-blown GRS, but I can live with that. I am more together, more myself, than I have ever been at any time when I have suppressed the femme side of myself. I can set it aside for a few days at a time, as when I go to Virginia to see my folks, but I can no longer be severed from it completely. I would sooner die (reads like hyperbole, but it's the Gods' truth).

For many years I CDed very little. Life was about the same.

But that was my decision and my desire. If my autonomy was taken from me, if I was forbidden to do this by someone with threat of something, I would no doubt get very resentful at the loss of my autonomy. I would probably either withdraw from the relationship or do passive aggressive self destructive things to take revenge on that person, forgetting that holding a resentment is like drinking poison and then waiting for the other person to die. Or just become suffieciently secretive that I could do it anyway.

Put me on a desert island with only mens clothes and I'll be worried about getting off the island, not what I am wearing.

Absaroka

If I did not CD I would go crazy. I have been in touch with this for so long that if I did not do it I would lose my mind fully. I have accepted that it is part of me and to deny that would be to deny myself.

If I couldn't dress or express my self? Ever? I'd be dead.

CJ

If I couldn't dress, I'd be miserable. In fact, it is why I stayed out of the military. I'm a big Libertarian anyway, so this would just make things worse. Like anything I enjoy, be it flying or music or whatever, having it forceably prohibited would be very unpleasant, indeed.

And yes, flying has recently been virtually impossible, not only for economic reasons, but also fear of being shot out of the sky over stupid anti-terrorist nonsense. And, now I guess you can tell I am miserable, even bitter, about it.

Darn us Libertarians who want real freedom, instead of some partisan political illusion of safety.

Hugs,

Bernice