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Do worry about your sons

Posted: Tue Sep 19, 2006 3:34 am
by Penni SO
Hi ya Goddesses of this chaotic world,

My CD and I have 4 sons and not outwardly we have been concerned that 1 would be passed the CD gene.

Well our sons are 12 ,10, 8 and 6 and you guessed 1 is showing early warning signs.However on a previous post I have talked about my 10 year old and the fact that he has Aspergers.
Putting the Aspergers aside he is very in tune with makeup products,silky clothing and maybe 3 times out of 7 days proclaims he feels like he is a girl.As I'm aware of how early crossdressers start crossdressing,I'm open to him and have started to educate the children and him in particularly about the differences society presents itself with,and that it is O.K to be different.

My femme has always avoided the above issues,because though he will be a supportive parent if our 10 year old son does turn out to be a crossdresser,he does'nt want him to ever know the pain,the ridicule or shame that others around him have bestowed on him.

My topic is.If you have sons that do not know about your crossdressing,do you worry for them,are you always looking for signs.?


OR
Have you avoided having children altogether,in the fear that the trait could be passed on..........I guess this is the extreme,however it has been known to happen

Love you all,penni

Posted: Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:12 am
by CJ
Hi all,

Penni,

Now that I look back on it and reflect, I think I've avoided having children altogether. Not because I was afraid of passing on some alleged "CD gene" but, rather, because I probably believed that my own emotional turmoil would prevent me from making a good parent. I realize today that this most likely would not have been the case; I think I'd make a most excellent parent. But, at 45 years of age, I figure this particular train has left the station without me.

Love,
CJ

Posted: Tue Sep 19, 2006 7:42 am
by DonnaT
I have one son, ADHD, and he knows. I never worried about whether he would also have the urge to CD, as it wouldn't have mattered if he did, and I could easily (hopefully) guide him in this journey. He's 29 now.

Posted: Thu Sep 21, 2006 7:40 pm
by Virginia
I have a son by my hopefully soon to be ex. He is 23, married, no children! My soon to be ex outted me to anyone and everyone except my son. However, I do have a daughter by a now deceased wife and she had/ has trouble adjusting to it, but seems OK with it right now - actually I think for her it is the out of sight out of mind theory! Anyway, she was talking with my son as they are very close for being step brother and sister and my son asked her something about me totally unrelated to CD my daughter misunderstood and said "OH, Daddy's crossdressing!" Well she said the silence on the other end of the phone was as loud as dynamite going off!!! She knew she had said the wrong thing. They did end up talking about it some. Later my son asked me about it and I said yes, I thought he knew as his mother had told everyone she knew. Well he said my daughter had inadvertently told him, but. "Dad, if that is your thing - go for it!" I am sure that my soon to be ex told my son's wife's parents and of course my daughter-in-law and them being good, Bible toting self-righteous, holier than thou, whatevers, want nothing to do with me. Does my son have "the gene?" Who know!!! I taught both my kids right from wrong, told them to be adults that they have to accept responsibility for their own actions and pushed them "out of the nest!" Today, I am proud of them, although we are not close and my son only lives a few miles away, he seems to have little if any interest in me so life goes on!!!
Love,
Virginia

PS: I have to say this that in a former life I had to travel quite a bit and I knew that my soon to be ex (hopefully) and my son were sleeping in the same bed up until he was about 12, ( I know nothing was going on! but what woman sleeps with her 12 year old son??) when my soon to be ex wanted us to go to family counseling because my son was getting "wild." and of course it was all my fault becasue I was not there to adminiser discipline. In the course of the first session she accused me of being an "absentee father" and I told the shrink about them "sleeping together." I swear I saw his eyes roll back in his head and the pupils turned into $$$$$$ signs. Well I never went back and they went together and separately for a few months. IT must have worked because they did stop sleeping in the same bed --- well at least as far as I know~!