Crossdressers-Haven.com

I'm new here. Have been reading a lot of posts to get familiar with everything. WOW! I am overwhelmed at the diversity of viewpoints and a refreshing articulation of those viewpoints.
The moderators do an outstanding job here.

I am wary and probably paranoid about communicating on the internet, but what I'm dealing with has compelled me to do so. It isn't like there is a section in the phone book for CDTG:)
Thanks for being here!!!
I came from a very repressive upbringing which has taken many years to overcome. The concept a group like this even exists is awesome.

Well, back to reading, I'll post again when appropriate. I have so many questions, don't know really where to start.


Sylvia H

Hi Sylvia--
A lot of feeling gets stirred up by your post. Will CDers begin to just know that many communities are out there on the Internet? It seems hard to imagine that CDers born five or ten years from now will ever be in the dark about this, but that may be too optimistic.

For one thing, many parental control programs block access to the word, "crossdress," so what does a young CD do then? (Younger members of the forum may be laughing because they know there's dozens of ways around this.)

All future speculation aside: I'm glad that YOU were able to find us. There is a wide range of experience on here. It is not a small thing to overcome a repressive upbringing. I didn't have to deal with that, and the world's negative views on crossdressing are hard enough to overcome all by themselves.

I hope you feel better about posting by and by. There will always be some risk factor, but I think it can be outweighed by the strength you gain from posting your own thoughts and experiences.

Sylvia.
hello and welcome

Jess

Thanks for your comments. My struggle appears to be somewhat 2 pronged. I was never permitted to have emotions and now that they are coming out, dont know how to deal with them,
I am very good at being logical, but logic cant explain everything despite what science may claim.
The other prong is the CD issue. I am pretty comfortable with it generally. In any normal endeavor I am used to having an idea about what <i am doing and why. After all one does not go to the grocery store and then decide what to buy: one has an idea ahead of time. Not so with CD. I am doing this kind of in the opposite way. A very new experience. Hope that makes sense.
My story is not unlike many have spoken of. Starting around age 5 or 6.
I always wanted to be pretty,
Maybe a good analogy for how I feel is that Im an old airplane being started after being stored for 50 years. The engines start but dont run very well till being serviced. Not something done easily or overnight.
But the light is on now and I aint about to turn it off.

Sorry if I seem to be jumping around. This is so new.

Sylvia H

Hi Sylvia and welcome to the forum. For the record, looking at your picture, you don't look anything like an old aeroplane. Very pretty actually.

The important thing is that we all have to start somewhere and you couldn't find a better 'somewhere' to start than right here.

Glad to have you with us!

Stephanie

Hi Sylvia,

I hope you find us all helpful and of some benefit, it’s reassuring to be amongst people (even if it is only on the internet) who know exactly what you mean and know exactly how you feel. You can be confident that you’re amongst friends and this place is free from any flaming or unpleasantness, so just relax and be yourself and enjoy the experience here. All the usual rules and cautions which apply to what we say on the internet applies as to identity and exact location, if you wish to keep it secret, but I believe you’ll find this forum one of the best available for our purposes.

Kind Regards and

Sally.

Hi Sylvia,

This forum has been very helpful to me. A lot of what people say I can't relate to and that's fine because it helps me figure out what I am by knowing what I am not. And at the same time there is a great deal here that I can relate to very well. I guess that is my way of saying enjoy the journey of self discovey which we will hopefully be a part of.

Looking forward to hearing more from you.

Absaroka

Absaroka,
Since posting last <i have read a considerable amount of old postings, including your comments in another thread regarding psychology and why we do this. I identify strongly with a lot of your comments.

It is paramount to me to gain an understanding of what Im doing. The logic as it were is all backside backwards to me. If it wasnt for the pleasantness of the experience it would make me think I was going crazy
Maybe its my engineering part of the brain speaking that has served me very well till now. I do have some ideas about all this. Making progress. Its turning out to be more complex than what meets the eye. I would post it but it would be rather lengthy and probably put people to sleep. I have a pretty good idea of why I do this and why other people can have problems with it. But I havent gotten through the "OK then, now what" stage.
So far the journey seems to resemble being afraid of the dark. There is a process one has to go through to get from there to reality that there is nothing inherent in the dark to be afraid of.
Just an analogy, but it seems to fit.

I will be quiet now.
Sylvia
PS - Anyone who can quote Floyd cant be all bad.

Hi ya Sylvia,

Hello Sylvia and a very warm welcome to the forum.I can imagine that you are feeling very much part of a sisterhood now that you know there are forums etc,where one can come and express their emotions and inner secrets.It takes a huge amount of courage to open up those feelings,especially when one has been used to supressing them.

I am a spouse to a CD/TS and have been welcomed and supported here,despite the distance,as I and my spouse live in Perth Western Australia.
We also in Western Australia are trying to keep a forum running for the transgendered,family and friends,please feel welcome to come and visit.
www.chameleonswa.com

hugs Penny

Sylvia post away. I'm always interested in other peoples take on why we do this, one of my other posts not withstanding. I've found reading some of my own posts to be very enlightening about what seems to be going on with me also. It really helps to write it all down for someone. And if anyone is bored, well that's the beauty of the internet. They don't have to read it.

Absaroka

Hi all,

First of all, welcome aboard, Sylvia. I hope your journey through these "soul-baring" pages turns out to be as fruitful to you as my journey through them has been to me.

I just want to second what Absaroka said. I found there were equal measures of help to be gotten both by reading about the experience of others on the forum as well as by setting down my own thoughts. The latter allowed me to see much more clearly what's going on in my own mind and heart. As such, this forum is akin to a diary, albeit a very public one where all are welcome to comment. Of course, this is what blogs are for but, to my mind, blogs are much more the work of one individual rather than the family effort this here forum feels like.

Always remember this, Sylvia: what may have taken you an hour and a half to write can nevertheless take only five minutes to read. So don't ever think you talk too much. This forum was created so that communication may flourish... within us and between us.

Again, welcome!

Love,
CJ

Thanks,
I needed to hear that.
Will try to post something soon, but holiday might delay things a bit.

Everyone so far has been so nice here! Not something Im used to,

xox
Sylvia

Hi Sylvia,
I would like to also add my welcome to you and I am glad that you are finding a sisterhood here kinda like a sorority to some degree. Like a sorority we seem to all major in something just a bit different so we study and test and get differing results. I like to think of us being on a crossdressing continuum and we are all sisters on the the same continuum, it is just, as you are finding out, we are mostly all at different places on the continuum. Some of us are moving from one place to another, while some a content to just stay where they are.
There is a very divergent group of girls here so virtually anything that you post it is almost guaranteed that someone will identify with it.
Tell us about you, how you feel, how those about you feel and if you have questions on what you might expect if you do "such and such!" You will find that someone probably has struggled through that and will be more than willing to share her experiences with you.
Hope you stay and participate.
Love,
Virginia

Sylvia H wrote:I have so many questions, don't know really where to start.

I think it would be best to start by simply posting your questions as they come to you.

Don't wait, as you may forget a question or two when coming up with new questions.

Or at least write them down, and if you can't find an answer on your own, post it here.