Crossdressers-Haven.com

A year ago I told my girlfriend about my crossdressing and she has been very supportive and understanding. She has bought me some underwear and make-up. She even wanted to do my first make up a few months ago.
At home I can dress anytime I want to, usually 2-3 times a week. I´ve totally accepted myself and enjoy my feminine side every day.

You are indeed very lucky my wife has known about my CDing for many years and she still does not accept it very well and at this point in my life I want to dress more. she want's the man she thought she married. but we keep on going a little at a time. once a month would be great and going shoping would be a real thrill oh well one step at a time.LOL paula P.S. love her and cherish her you truly are blessed.

Joanna,

You are very fortunate indeed. My girlfriend is also on the path to acceptance. I try to make sure that her needs come first, and "Sharon's" come second.

Sharon Rose

Hi Joanna,

I'm in a simliar boat. I can dress whenever I like.
Yay for accepting SO's!

I'm happy for you and glad you're another of the growing number of men who tell their SO's they are transgendered(crossdressers).

Beauty

That's wonderful, Joanna!

I most certainly do envy you. Cherish the time that you have to dress. Cherish the open-minded, accepting woman by your side. Don't ever take either for granted.


*hugs*
~ Lorna

Got things going thru my mine and am not sure how to express them . I like a few have the freedom to dress when ever I want usually ever morning until early afternoon until people start popin in.My wife who is a wonderful person spends about 85% of her time in a wheelchair so I do almost all the cleaning and what every needs getting done. Sometimes I wonder as I go about my chores if my dressing is my way of coping with life. Dressing has become an everyday thing and neighter of us thinks twice about it except when I want to really doll up to look my very best. . But my problem lately is dressing in front of my wife and doing my makeup :| . All of a sudden I'm closing the door as I get dressed and feel out of place Like I said earlyer my wife is loving and VERY supportive even tells me when I have mismatch cloths or "a little to much makeup honey". Maybe it's that time of month,Oups sorry ladys that wasn't called for, just drepressed. Carol Ann

Hi Carol Ann,

You expressed your feelings very well, so don't worry.

I do find dressing and cleaning are therapeutic for me. I usually wear heels when I do it and I'm walking better than ever in them now.

I do have a favor to ask. Open up the doors and let your wife in or back in to your applying makeup. Don't close them. Fight through being uncomfortable and trust her. The positive feeback you'll get is worth it. You dress everyday. Please don't shut your SO out of this.

If you feel that you do this because it's the ONLY private time you have then I understand. I was only saying, "Don't do it to your marriage" IF it's because you think she's uncomfortable. Leave that to her to tell you. Don't decide on your own, without her input because you're too, "In the fishbowl." to be able to tell if you're doing it for her benefit.

You are a great SO Carol Ann!

I hope everyone can have the loving, trusting relationship with their SO's that you have.

Beauty

Thank you all for your kind thoughts. In my case, telling my girlfriend was the only way to save our relationship. We were about to separate but then everything changed. Before we met I had been living on my own for 10 years and naturally I dressed whenever I wanted to. I met her 3 years ago and in the beginning I was so in love with her that a thought of giving up dressing for good crossed my mind. As you all know, giving up dressing just isn´t possible. I had been shaving my legs for ten years but
let it all grow back when we started dating. I couldn´t dress for 3 months and it started to affect to my behavior and she felt that something was wrong. I told her everything was fine and that me being so tense and stressed had nothing to do with our relationship. I waited 2 years but things weren´t so good between us. I started dressing again when I had a chance. She visited her sister and parents quite often on weekends and I got my chances to dress. Still I was feeling quilty and I wasn´t able to really enjoy my dressing.
Between Christmas and new year´s eve 2002 we had a serious conversation. She said she knew there was something going on behind her back and asked if I had another woman. I had to tell her the whole story beginning from my childhood. I told her about my secret wardrobe,
my silicone breastforms, wig etc. I knew there was a possibility that she might leave me. As you can imagine I was more than surprised when she hugged and kissed me, hold my hand and told me that it´s not such a big
deal She said I would still be the same man for her and my clothes had nothing to do with that. Since then we have discussed a lot about crossdressing whenever she needs to and started keeping a diary on our computer. This diary of ours has helped us enormously. It´s easier to write about some difficult things than talk about them.
At first the progress was slow and we agreed that I dress once a week when she´s not at home. Suddenly it felt wonderful to be able to dress fully and shave my legs again. Last summer we got engaged and she felt ready to see me dressed. After that day I´ve dressed 2-3 times a week and as I mentioned earlier she did my first make up a couple of months ago. When I´m dressed we cook ,watch tv, talk a lot and do all kinds of things together.
I´ve agreed not to sleep in my nightie or polish my toe nails red even if I very much wanted to. She prefers not to hug and kiss me when I have my breastforms and make up on but that´s ok with me. Maybe those things change in the future. At least I hope so. Lately I´ve started to pluck my eyebrows and my fingernails are longer than before.
Now I can say that telling her was right thing to do. She had a right to know. I sincerely hope that all of you who still hide your crossdressing,
could find the courage to tell your wifes or girlfriends. Everything gets so much easier when you don´t have to hide your clothes anymore.
You can write to me in this forum or send a private message if you
have difficulties telling your partner. I ´ll try to help anyway I can.

Love
Joanna

Hi Joanna,

What a great story.

Thank goodness it's starting to become a common theme here!

Though there is a common theme, each story is still very unique.

I think it's incredibly cool how your relationship was rocky and then you opened up and trusted your girlfriend (now your wife). That took a lot of courage!!!

I agree with you about those who are hiding. Some just plain old can't tell because they know what will happen, but for those who already have a relationship and they are suffering, maybe it's time to be like Joanna and others here who have told their SOs.

Joanna, I do think she will become more comfortable being held, or cuddling and maybe even allowing you to paint your nails. Your patience will pay obig dividends.

Best of luck to you both!

Beauty

Thank You big sister ,
Beauty I haven't closed the door to my wife and its not a matter of private time. It's a feeling of uncomfort all of a sudden when I'm putting on my bra and stockings.and she is in the room watching me. Maybe a little guilt or shame who knows. Dressing as Carol Ann is just an everyday thing and a norm to both of us, she doesn't care if its a skirt or jeans she excepts both with equal love and kindness . Right now there is an alful lot going on in our life as we put the house up for sale and are preparing for the big move to our new home. . Oh well I feel much better just talking about it. As far as wearing heels to do chores around the house she saids I have too in fact she wants me to get a french maids outfit to wear for her. As you can see we are happy together all 3 of us ( her, carol Ann, and husband ). Carol Ann

Good morning Julie ,
Yes you and I both wear the same size heels in this life. Yes dressing does help a lot in fact I prefure to be dressed enfem rather then in drab.
I really do enjoy dressing all up as if we were going to a party or out to dinner somewhere only problem is unless it's a Tri-Ess meeting or outing she will not let me out of the house . Hay our problem aren't as big as our S.O. but our love for them is even bigger. Carol Ann

Carol Ann wrote:Thank You big sister ,
Beauty I haven't closed the door to my wife and its not a matter of private time. It's a feeling of uncomfort all of a sudden when I'm putting on my bra and stockings.and she is in the room watching me. Maybe a little guilt or shame who knows. . . .

Hi Carol Ann,

I didn't mean to offend you by my post. I'm sorry if I did.

When I was saying "closing the door" I only was only using that as a metaphor. I was trying to recommend you "let her in" to even your most uncomfortable feelings and talk about the way you feel because you've opened up so much already. I only meant to suggest you continue to grow together and not have anything that she doesn't know about. Again, I'm sorry it came out the wrong way. I hope this one comes out ok.

About the heels while doing house work. We share a common bond. My wife insists I wear heels too when cleaning. Talk about coming a long way (for her).

Beauty

Na you didn't hurt my feelings. Carol Ann

Hi! All,

I so much like hearing about your lives. It is a wonderful exchange of
sharing and caring. I want all our paths to go higher and higher.

Kersten

Julie,
Many thanks for the kind words, now I think I'm gonna cry
Speeking of getting out and going for walk, maybe you could do as the wife and I do. She jumps into the wheelchair and I push we do get out a lot as I know she gets very tired of having to stay at home. I took her out by the lake and we put out a dozen crab nets and had a ball. Carol Ann