Crossdressers-Haven.com

The last eight months or so have been pretty stressful. I lost my job in June. I lost my apartment in September and moved back to Virginia to live with my parents. Mom died in November.

Mom and I didn't always get along, but we reconnected the last few years. It took her awhile, but she eventually accepted my being transgendered. She would talk to Dad about me, but the three of us never got the chance to talk together about it.

I got away to Charlotte for a couple of days for a Kappa Beta get-together in December, but I haven't had any other outlet for that side of me. It's been driving me nuts. My birthday is this weekend, and I want out. Plus, Pink Essence is having a Girls' Night Out in Virginia Beach in two weeks, and I'm really looking forward to it.

This morning, after work, I sat down with Dad and told him how I was feeling. I was expecting a blow-up, because I remember how he felt about things when I was a teenager. I was nervous as hell, half afraid Dad was going to toss me out into the street. It was all for naught.

I mentioned before that Mom shared everything with Dad. It turns out, he made a separate peace with me in his mind. He's not happy that I'm this way, but he says that it's my life, and if this is how I choose to live, that's okay with him. He was actually surprised that I hadn't broached the subject sooner. Mom told him before she left that she wanted me to resume my life and lifestyle as I lived in Charlotte, and that Dad wasn't to interfere. I offered to rent a hotel room on the weekends, so I could dress up out of his sight. He told me I could dress at home. He actually went so far as to say I could dress at home, as in around the house, if I wanted.

I was speechless for a bit. I've sold my Dad short. He's an intelligent, perceptive and sensitive man, and somehow I never saw it.

Wow, for some people when it rains it pours. Sorry bout all the probs you've been having, specially sorry bout your mom.

But it seems a bright spot has appeared out of your darkness,, this is nice that your dad has come to accept you and the way you are.

Nice to hear your dad has such love for you. Moderation may be necessary though, to ease him along.

Jaye,

Here's hoping you soon get yourself back to a good place in your life; maybe getting closer to your Dad will help, in this regard. Having the freedom to be ourselves lets us move in directions we actually want to.

You're in my thoughts.

Love,
CJ

I'm sorry to hear about all the losses you've had over the last year. But it is good to hear that your dad is more accepting. I'd echo the advice of others about acceptance being a two way street.

Hang in there.

Absaroka

Jaye,

How uplifting to hear this great news. I hear an incredible sense of relief in your post. I know those feelings well. Many of those I expected to respond negatively, actually turned out supportive. Ironically, many of those I thought would take it well, took it really bad and terminated our relationships.

In the end, we just never know how people are going to react. I am glad to hear that things are going to be ok with you and your dad. I have a feeling him knowing the true you will bring about a closeness you never felt before. I am just so happy for you.

Love always,
Elizabeth

Hi Jaye--
That is good news. Even if your father has second thoughts about some of this, there is a basic acceptance there.

Hi Jaye,

I am so sorry to hear about your mom! I am happy that your father seems to be accepting and I am also very happy that you are getting involved with PinkEssence. They are about the only game in town right now that you/we can socialize with our sisters. Hope you can attend the "party." Any place called the Rainbow Cactus can't be all bad! Please let us know how that goes also.

Love,

Virginia

Glad you have a dad who understands now.