Being lonely

[Alexandra]

Hi Julie,

You're not alone in feeling this way! In fact I recall a post or two just like this one posted back in December pondering about how nice it would be just to have a couple of CD/TG friends get all dressed up and come over for a beer or two at a friend's home. A simple gathering like this would erase quite a bit of loneliness. With any luck at all you might find such a friend or two in your area eventually.

[CJ]

Hi all,

Julie, you're not alone, trust me. Loneliness is something we grapple and contend with most of our lives, married or not, crossdresser or not. I think the thread Alexandra referred to is this one: http://crossdressers-forum.com/forums/v ... .php?t=231

Wish I could share a beer with you, face to face. :| Chin up, girl!

Love,
CJ

[Jadhe]

I'd prefer wine.

[Laura]

Hi Julie-girl,

Have you thought of travelng to a meeting of Tri-Ess or some other transgender/cd group in the nearest big city in your state? You could probably find that out on the internet.

Yes, this is a great forum! I feel lucky to have found it; and I experience a kind of happy camaraderie with many people who post messages in the forum. I think it is natural for us to feel lonely. How many people have the experience of having two genders in one body?

Try not to get down, however. I've found the best cure for being depressed or down is simply to start taking some action, even if very minimal. Figure out ways to get out of the house.

Love,

Laura

[CJ]

Julie,

You mean you never tried cow-tipping while wearing heels?

Love,
CJ

[CJ]

To tell you the truth, although I understand the words, I'm not exactly sure what the practice of cow-tipping consists in. Is it just that? tipping cows over? Holy Fricolee, how do you tip a cow? They must weigh what? 800-900 lbs? Plus, why would anyone want to do that? Although they probably don't sustain injury (aside from that done to their dignity), the animal-lover in me suspects that cows who become victims of this practice are likely annoyed, to say the least.

Seriously, Julie, I don't know Iowa, but isn't there beautiful farmland and rolling hills out there? Ideal spaces for wonderful pic-nics, a breath of fresh air, no? Is your wife able to go out at all? I don't know that it would help in quelling loneliness, but this kind of communion with the natural world can do wonders for the sagging spirit (says this city girl, who finds she has way too much "city" in her at the moment ).

Well, keep us posted on possible Windy City adventures, eh?

Love,
CJ

[Kyra]

CJ - from what i've heard, cows can sleep while standing. So you (after a few beers or bottles of wine) sneak into the pasture at night and 1,2,3, heave with all your might. The startled cow bellows after it falls. This is supposed to be quite amusing. I have never had the opportunity to try, so I can't give first hand knowledge.
And to be completely honest...it just seems a ridiculous thing to try. Now toilet papering someones' house...that's another story!

Oh, BTW - Julie, I wish we could all get together and laugh over a few drinks. Wouldn't that be a hoot!

Hugs,
Kyra

[CJ]

Hi all,

I agree, Kyra, that would be a hoot!

What say you, Julie? ...Julie? Kyra, I think Julie's busy grading papers again.

To be honest with you gals, I'm a bit of a, umm, er, ah, bovinophobe. When I was about 12 years old, our father planted us on a local farm for an entire summer. Aside from having the farmer's 20 year old son trying to bury me in the grain silo and dumping buckets of manure on me, I once got caught in a barbed wire fence out in the pastures and, by the time my screams had made these good, simple country folk aware of my plight, a group of cows had come to investigate me, one of them licking away at my face, head, shoulders, and arms, as I struggled to free myself (further injuring myself in the process).
Today, I'd rather spend a fortnight penniless in South Central L.A. than share the same square mile with a big-nostriled Jersey for half an hour. Don't get me wrong; I love cows (all animals, really). But, like piranhas, volcanoes, and supernovas, I'll examine them from afar.

Love,
CJ

[CJ]

Julie also comes packaged with a big heart, sex unspecified.

[Beauty]

Hi all:

You may (or may not) have noticed that I've posted about 4 bazillion times since I joined. This place is so comforting and reassuring and I really needed to connect with other girls. But the down side is that I realize (once again) that I'm pretty lonely in this part of my life.

I grew up in LA but live in a rural state. There are very few local resources and I have never been dressed in front of anybody but my wife. Helen (of Betty fame) graciously asked me if I would like to try her website. And I did and its great. But I left because there were all these great get togethers that were being discussed and I realized even more what I was missing.

We can't really travel because of my wife's illness -- plus we have been hit financially a bit. But I would love to dress up and just sit with a couple of girls and chat. I don't know, its late and I've had all of three beers and I'm feeling sorry for myself. But there it is. Thanks for giving me a shoulder to cry on.

Hugs, Julie

I'm glad you told me you've been posting a lot because I was starting to feel like I hadn't been here in a while.

If you ever want to just chat online, have a drink and share some time with me talking about "gurl" stuff, please feel free to. It would be an honor.

Like Alexandra said, "You're not alone feeling this way." Hopefully that is comforting.

Read you soon,
Beauty

[Jeanie-Marie]

Julie,
I live in rural Iowa to. About 20 miles south of Dubuque. If the bike trip you took on Ragbra ended in Bellevue you went by my house.
Only two things to do out here--tip cows and watch the corn grow. I love Iowa but its lonly if we dont get out and find others like ourselves. I havent came out to anyone but my wife and dogs. Would be interested in
meeting people in area with same intrests.
Jeanie-Marie

[Kersten Lee]

Julie and Jeanie Marie,

I have lived in middle Nebraska all my life. I share your feelings. The
contact here has been so wonderful. I love the discussions and love the
desenting views. Most everyone respect each other even through
disagreements. It is such a great supportive place. I do feel the loneliness
like you though. I would love like most to not fear and be free to dress
and go out as I pleased.

It would be so nice to have a friend here and be able to call and say,
Let's go to a movie tonight and have dinner. My wife loves and supports me but also fears what could happen if someone recognized us together.
She's ok if I go out and that is nice but I truely need her to be with me
and share in my joy of finding myself. I also think going out alone
could expose a person to more scrutiny than in a pair. I don't know if
that is true or not.

I don't think I can help your loneliness, but I can share your feelings
and tell you, your both great and lovely people. Maybe that meeting
will work out some day and share some companionship side by side.

Kersten

[Lorna]

HI Julie,

First and foremost, let me give you some big (((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))

Second, I must concur... CDing can feel very lonely at times. When I was first stepping out in public, I did not own a computer, and I did not have any resources whatsoever. In my mind I was the only non "drag qieen" out there. Imagine my pleasant suprise when I first discovered the wonderful world of CDing on the web! The internet really helped me a lot.

I think that you are a beautiful person, Julie, and I really hope that things get better for you and your wife. I hope that someday if I am ever in your neck of the woods that we can meet up and have a nice girls' lunch or something to that degree.

[Josey]

Hi Julie,

Like you, I live in a rural area. Mine is in North Central Florida. This is a highly religious area where alcohol and the mention of sex is a no-no. Can you just imagine the attitude toward someone who does what we do??? I have lived here for six years and have yet to find another like me. I am sure they are out there but have the same feelings I do. My daughter suggested I move to the city near her but that has other drawbacks like heavy traffic and higher crime. I moved here to get away from that so going back doesn't make sense either.

I guess we just have to live with whatever is most important to us and put up with the rest. To quote the old saying, "here I am all dressed up and no place to go!!"