I think I have figured myself out

[Anita]

Elizabeth wrote:

So for me the clothes are needed as part of my denial that I am male. Without them, I would have to continually verbalize to everyone that I am not a male, or everyone will expect me to behave as one. While crossdressed, no one expects me to act male. The clothes tell everyone.

Thank you, Elizabeth. The clothes are a shorthand statement. It saves a lot of time, and the more feminine the clothes, the less energy I have to put into proving anything. The easiest presentation uses dresses of some sort, because that's automatically feminine. It is a little harder to go out in pants, for me, because it's no longer as clear what I'm presenting.

Reading your statement, I can understand a little more why it was so hard to bring any so-called "feminine" characteristics to the surface, while I was still being a man. Without the clothing, it can be confusing when a man acts in some way that is clearly feminine. I never wanted to confuse people, so for me, I didn't have very many options as a man. In some ways, it takes more courage to be a "feminine" man than it does to be a full-out version of a woman.

Absaroka wrote:

Therefore the crossdresser who dresses as a woman in spite of his wifes discomfort is exerting "male privilege" and not acting "feminine" The feminine thing to do would be to do what the partner wanted and dress like a man.

Now that's a unique way of looking at it, Absaroka. It's amusing, and there's some truth in it.


DeeDee wrote:

Do I dress to please her....of course, but I always wore them anyway and she knows I'm Dee in any mode. She does prefer me as a lady, so maybe thats beyond most relationships...but I'm in heaven So, I dress to please her, (and me) and the attention I get from guy types just flatters me.

A nice situation, Dee. I can see why you'd be happy with that.

[Johanna]

Like you, I am torn between enjoyment of being a male and my secret urge to CD. I have a good physique and women think I am sexy as a male. I am afraid Johanna cannot quite compare in that regard, as I just have too much hair and muscle to make a convincing woman.

Does anyone else wonder what it would be like to actually BE female. You said you didn't want that, but who would not want to experience life as a biological woman, including the sensation of wearing women's clothing, having men covet you, and the feeling of a climax.

In part, I am always frustrated, because I know that I will never truly know what having breasts and a vagina could be. At least in this lifetime. One thought that has frequently occurred to me is that I was female in a past life and the transition was not complete.

I would appreciate your take on this.

[Absaroka]

Sure I wonder what it would be like to be a woman. I think it would be nice to be struck female for a couple of weeks to find out. But I'm pretty sure I'd be happy when the couple of weeks were over to go back to being a man.

I've watched lots of people be female. My wife, my daughters, my mother and sister, former lovers, friends. It seems like a lot of work. In particular with my daughters and younger sister I watched them learn to become women instead of girls. Sometimes my daughters and I talk about these things, especially my older daughter who is fairly comfortable talkiing to me about all sorts of stuff. We talk about what it is like for her becoming a woman. I don't envy her, but it is her journey, not mine anyway and I am just a source of support.

I've also learned that my desire to wear female clothes is a very male aspect of me, which I realize is repeating myself.

Absaroka

[Leeza]

Joanna said

At least in this lifetime. One thought that has frequently occurred to me is that I was female in a past life and the transition was not complete.

I too have wondered if I was a female in a past life. I have thought about regressive hypnosis, but haven't found anyone close to do it.

Leeza

[Billie Earls]

Joanna,maybe thats the reason we are the way we are because of some unfinished karma in another lifetime. The would explain the way we are and the many different phases each of us is in.

[Absaroka]

As for having a vagina and breasts, lets see, pushing a baby out through that vagina and having it hanging off my breasts for the next half a year.....no thanks. Even though I enjoyed bottle feeding my children.

Absaroka