Uncertain Foundation

Davita · Post by **Davita** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 8:10 am

I understand both those issues. Even when I'm totally fem and the girls want to strip off my layers to bare skin, I have refused. Partly because I don't want to have that mixed mode in public and the other is that 9 times out of 10 they want to put a foundation on that isn't going to have the necessary coverage.

If you don't want the "publicity," there are always excuses like a costume party, some event like Marti Gras charity ball and Halloween that you are preparing for in the near future. BTW, Marti Gras parties happen just about any time someone wants to throw one. The other way to help easy your concerns in public it bring along a friend and it doesn't matter if it's a boy or girl. friends make good "deflectors".

As for needing to get mentally prepared for the next steps? I was ready from day one I think, but had to get past the "just how the heck does that work?" in my head. I know others just never cared if the get out and others don't want to think they might have tendencies toward being TS -- that's a big change in the way one thinks about one's self. There is never a rush to take any "next step."

Take your time, ask everyone all the questions you want. sales folk never seem to mind and if you got GG friends that know... Makeup is always a fun topic; just don't expect to stay on that one because there are shoes to talk about and the other girls' fashions.

Anthony Simon · Post by **Anthony Simon** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 1:04 pm

Davita wrote:I understand both those issues. Even when I'm totally fem and the girls want to strip off my layers to bare skin, I have refused. Partly because I don't want to have that mixed mode in public and the other is that 9 times out of 10 they want to put a foundation on that isn't going to have the necessary coverage.

Well, the thing about being mixed mode in public is you automatically become a centre of attention. I mean I don't mind being a floor show, but I have to be prepared for it - for all the flak and whatever else. The other thing is I have to be set up in my own mind for what is likely to be quite a concentrated educational experience. I mean if the SA's start saying they want to put x,y and z on me, I need to have thought through enough to know what things I'm quite sure won't work etc. Just so I can get the most I can out of quite a stressful (anyway in advance) day.

As for needing to get mentally prepared for the next steps? I was ready from day one I think, but had to get past the "just how the heck does that work?" in my head. I know others just never cared if the get out and others don't want to think they might have tendencies toward being TS -- that's a big change in the way one thinks about one's self. There is never a rush to take any "next step."

The thing is my "first step" wasn't voluntary. I was put in a nightgown by my grandmother and was conficted from the first. So that's my history of dressing up - conflicted. But I do enjoy it now and want to go on. I do feel I should be trying to construct a kind of plausible female presentation, which could kind of imply going out, but I'm not sure. I'm pretty sure I have TS tendencies, given that I have fantasies about being a woman - but, at the same time I think "This is kind of dumb, just where do you think you're going with this?". And not without reason... So, conflict...

Take your time, ask everyone all the questions you want. sales folk never seem to mind and if you got GG friends that know... Makeup is always a fun topic; just don't expect to stay on that one because there are shoes to talk about and the other girls' fashions.

Yup, take my time seems just about it. Then it's fun...

Post by **DonnaT** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 12:19 pm

I get hot while putting makeup on as well, so I set a fan in the sink to blow cool air on my face, and use alcohol to first wipe all the oil from my skin before starting.

Ralitsa · Post by **Ralitsa** » Tue Apr 05, 2011 1:38 pm

I don't know anything about make-up, since I don't use it, but from reading this string a couple of questions arise. First, what are your expectations for the make-up to accomplish? Basically, do you want it to make you look perfect, or to look exactly like some female ideal that is in your mind, or just to make you look better than you otherwise would? Maybe expecting it to make you look perfect is a bit unrealistic, I think every woman has trouble with her make-up in one way or another. But if you want it just to make you look better than you otherwise would, I'm guessing you might not need to try as hard as you are.
I suffer this problem with my hair, it will never look as good as I want it to. So I do what I can to make it look better and leave it at that. I guess I'm a little different, since I don't exactly try to pass as a woman, so my level of acceptance may be lower. But my point is that sometimes trying too hard is worse than just making the best of what you have.

Anthony Simon · Post by **Anthony Simon** » Tue Apr 05, 2011 3:10 pm

Ralitsa wrote:I don't know anything about make-up, since I don't use it, but from reading this string a couple of questions arise. First, what are your expectations for the make-up to accomplish? Basically, do you want it to make you look perfect, or to look exactly like some female ideal that is in your mind, or just to make you look better than you otherwise would?

I think basically I always wanted to look in the mirror and see a woman looking back. That was before I tried makeup and just wore the clothes with or without a wig (which I did for distinct periods over the years). A couple of years I started up again and was satisfied to go as before for a year or so. But then it got more intense and I started wearing makeup for the first time - like I wasn't satisfied basically looking like a man in women's clothes and wig, occasionally catching sight of something more womanly in my expression.

Maybe 9 months ago I got to the point where, if I didn't look too closely, I got an approximation to a woman looking back (from some angles and some of the time) and I've been trying to improve on that ever since. The ultimate goal is to get my face to the point where it would be passable as a woman's if I were walking about in the street. It's not perfection, it's "good enough" I'm looking for. Also it's not an ideal of a woman, I'll take more or less whatever I get so long as it's more or less convincing (always assuming that's a possibility).

Maybe expecting it to make you look perfect is a bit unrealistic, I think every woman has trouble with her make-up in one way or another. But if you want it just to make you look better than you otherwise would, I'm guessing you might not need to try as hard as you are.
I suffer this problem with my hair, it will never look as good as I want it to. So I do what I can to make it look better and leave it at that. I guess I'm a little different, since I don't exactly try to pass as a woman, so my level of acceptance may be lower. But my point is that sometimes trying too hard is worse than just making the best of what you have.

Well, there's no doubt I'm pretty tough on myself, but that's just how I am about things. It's kind of my life, where I've had to make sure I've got a defensible position (nothing to do with CDing).

Anthony Simon · Post by **Anthony Simon** » Wed Apr 06, 2011 8:07 am

DonnaT wrote:I get hot while putting makeup on as well, so I set a fan in the sink to blow cool air on my face, and use alcohol to first wipe all the oil from my skin before starting.

I tried using a fan last night. I thought the finish looked better (I would probably be happy with it at that level) and it seemed substantially more durable. I had some problems with the powder blowing about (and I'm also using powder foundation). I had tried using an alcohol wipe before, but I didn't notice much difference, so I left that out.

Overall (and for the first time) this was a good result. Thanks Donna. You do know a lot (IMHO).