up and down

[Sophie Moor]

i dont cope very well with stuff ,, im up and down , i try and realize my life but i carnt . So as per usual i avoid life aspects and try to work it out with abuse , drugs an stuff . As always i arrive back at the station

>> sorry .. ment not


>> Sorry. Sorry .Sorry..
what for ?

"For the love "

but i not seen love

" i set you this quest"

what am i to do ?

"its up to you"

but i dont know any thing

"you have avoided your self"


>> Devine is true .
and always keep smiling
it will be ok



** Edited to combine four (4) successive posts, as per: http://crossdressers-haven.com/forums/v ... 65&t=10059" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; - SL

[DonnaT]

Sounds like you may have an issue with depression, and a therapist might be in order. One who can prescribe legal, non-abusive drugs.

[Sophie Moor]

yes i know ,, thank you . but i carnt break thro . seriously ,, like i said before , it goes up when i feel my direction is correct and yet it goes down when i feel i made a mistake , ive done the zoloft , i done the in and out at the docs , ive told them i dont want anti deps ,, the only thing i havent told em yet is ................

>> point of topic= "up and down" means nothing related to organs ! its a spiritual thing

>> thanx Donna any way .. love you . tyvm for seeing my posts

>> oh ,, idk . all i know is that i prefer to dress as a i do, gender identity is not simple , i am no doubt madder than a Easter hat but i know one thing above all else ... im happy to say my heart holds more Love then most folk ,and Love is all you need.

>> yep .. to put it normal words ..'Do i look like i give a F***"

>> that wasnt a question .. heeheh

>> ~sophie goes back to experimenting with the i light ~ sweeties



** Edited to combine seven (7) successive posts and to edit foul language, as per: http://crossdressers-haven.com/forums/v ... 65&t=10059" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; - SL

[Anthony Simon]

oh ,, idk . all i know is that i prefer to dress as a i do, gender identity is not simple , i am no doubt madder than a Easter hat but i know one thing above all else ... im happy to say my heart holds more Love then most folk ,and Love is all you need.

Yeah, well, 1+1=2 and 2+2=3 and 3+3=4. So you're dancing around in front of people and telling them how much pain you hold, sideways. If you have a memory from 3-4 of you dressing up, it probably means that this whole thing is a big part of you. I don't know about you being madder than...

Yeah, lots of people go up and down. I go up and down. The less you have in your life, the more you're prone to it, if I'm anything to go by. You keep saying, one way or another, that you don't let people in - or maybe they don't let you in. Which is not exactly great for the amount you have in your life.

[Sophie Moor]

ok , yes .. but what do you mean ? Is it - the less of life you live the more of life you feel ?
Does Pain construct life or does life make Pain? If so- what amount of pain does it take to qualify as having a life? Or how much Life is needed before you feel pain?
Amount of Life .
My life is part of the universe and, just like you, I have been here before.
I am poor with Evil but rich with Love. Man .. ive been pulled from my car and shot in the leg and robbed , ive seen my friends die from "Social Diseases" , in the 80's (im born in '65) and drugs problems, Ive lived in several different parts of the world and indeed i am still Alive and i hold no pain or hatred (so far so good) . My amount is the same as the same .What amount of life does it take to be Alive ?

your quote from Socrates is excellent

Hope i dont get told off

Soph

[Anthony Simon]

Well, one of my lines is "Where's the pain?". Like if I can't feel any pain in something - even if it's buried beneath the surface - I start to doubt its reality.

I think a person can carry too much pain (speaking for myself) - and, in those cases, it just mucks everything else up and prevents proper engagement with anyone else because then the pain's in the way.

[Sophie Moor]

yes, however ,pain is a physical element of life is it not ? The physical can be divided many fold and never reach Zero .If you consider your pain ,will you ever reach zero pain? Is the pain manifest in reality , or is reality simply nonsense that contains nothing except pain? Indeed , when identity of the physical is put through any kind of function relative to the metaphysical ,does it not retain the origin of aspect physical to the concept? Does that mean the conscientiousness personality trait has to suffer pain by a division applied by the restraints of life and law ? I would say No.

Peace and Love

hope your safe


soph

[Anthony Simon]

Well, for me, when I dress up, sometimes the whole world goes away. So, for that time, whatever pain I've been holding from the world takes a rest. Then an odd thing happens. Sometimes, although I'm not thinking about the stuff, it's like the woman I become processes it and comes to some sort of answer about it.

Like it makes sense of whatever bit of the nonsense that had been bugging me. I don't think reality is nonsense, it's simply that we don't understand so much of what goes on that it is functional chaos.

Now , granted that I am lucky in this, still it makes me think that some at least of pain can be dealt with if one finds the right way to attack it.

I don't think necessarily all pain is derivable from a physical source. And that that isn't is susceptible to the sort of "games with the inside of my head" that I'm talking about.

[Sophie Moor]

Thanks for staying in touch Ruby ..
I was writing a reply but the mouse ate it
Hope your well

Speak soon

Love Sophie