Here's a link to a website I created, which discusses my thoughts on cross-dressing, based on my own personal experimentation and research. I was trying to get a better understand transgenderism in general, but I also wished to explore the following question:
Is it possible for male-to-female cross-dressing to be a positive, constructive activity, when kept in a healthy perspective and pursued in a responsible way?
I realize that we are all different, and what I say will not apply to everyone. Nevertheless, I would be interested in learning your reactions.
http://members.aol.com/miscmg/meaning.htm
My Quest for Healthy Crossdressing
Moderators: KimberlyS, CathyAnn
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Maggie
- Miss Sapphire Goddess
- Posts: 92
- Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2004 2:44 pm
- Location: USA
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Elizabeth
- Miss Ruby Goddess
- Posts: 1878
- Joined: Mon May 03, 2004 3:02 am
Hi Maggie,
I read your article and found it to be interesting, if not a basic rehashing of a lot of what is already on the internet.
While I found your firm belief in Jung's basic theories to be the bottom line of your overall conclusions, you never seem to address the outright dislike of ones body. You don't seem to appreciate the discomfort that one can have being in a body that makes you uncomfortable.
Your view doesn't seem to take into consideration the true transsexual. You seem to beleive that we all have a male side that we need to express outwardly. I am not so sure that is so. I would not even know where to start. I have spent my life trying to express the male side of me, but it is only been an illusion. I just don't feel those things. I don't know what my male side is, much less how to project it.
I am not sure balance is required. I believe that only the need to accept that we are what we are, must be fulfilled. However, being so recently out of the closet, and dressing out in public, It has been suggested to me by many sources that I am probably feeling pent up desires that will subside with time.
I am not enirely sure this is true. I have always felt I was a girl trapped in a boy's body. At least since I was 8-9. To me dressing all the time is not a fantasy come true. It has no sexual aspect to it. It is merely me expressing to the world that I feel like I am a girl and always have.
I do dress 24/7 now and have for several months now, which is really early into the process. However I do feel better physically, and my blood pressure which has always been borderline high, is now in the normal range, but only when I am dressed "en femme". So dressing is for sure relieving stress. I feel perfectly normal and comfortable dressed in public. I am not self concious at all.
I have recently posted a thread wondering if "normal" men dressed "en femme" would exhibit female qualities hidden within them. You experience seems to suggest this is true. I know that I have learned that our facial expressions for instance can work in reverse. Put a smile on your face and you will become happy. Put a frown on your face and you will become sad. It works, try it. So I can not help but believe that doing ones best to "act" as a woman, would not have a similar effect and bring out those qualities.
Having said that, it is my personal beleif that this is different than having distress with ones own body. The difference between what one would "enjoy" and what one can "tolerate". I don't dress because I enjoy it, although that is a side effect. I dress because I can't stand to pretend I am a man in the way the society wants to think of me any longer.
I hope that helps.
Love always,
Elizabeth
I read your article and found it to be interesting, if not a basic rehashing of a lot of what is already on the internet.
While I found your firm belief in Jung's basic theories to be the bottom line of your overall conclusions, you never seem to address the outright dislike of ones body. You don't seem to appreciate the discomfort that one can have being in a body that makes you uncomfortable.
Your view doesn't seem to take into consideration the true transsexual. You seem to beleive that we all have a male side that we need to express outwardly. I am not so sure that is so. I would not even know where to start. I have spent my life trying to express the male side of me, but it is only been an illusion. I just don't feel those things. I don't know what my male side is, much less how to project it.
I am not sure balance is required. I believe that only the need to accept that we are what we are, must be fulfilled. However, being so recently out of the closet, and dressing out in public, It has been suggested to me by many sources that I am probably feeling pent up desires that will subside with time.
I am not enirely sure this is true. I have always felt I was a girl trapped in a boy's body. At least since I was 8-9. To me dressing all the time is not a fantasy come true. It has no sexual aspect to it. It is merely me expressing to the world that I feel like I am a girl and always have.
I do dress 24/7 now and have for several months now, which is really early into the process. However I do feel better physically, and my blood pressure which has always been borderline high, is now in the normal range, but only when I am dressed "en femme". So dressing is for sure relieving stress. I feel perfectly normal and comfortable dressed in public. I am not self concious at all.
I have recently posted a thread wondering if "normal" men dressed "en femme" would exhibit female qualities hidden within them. You experience seems to suggest this is true. I know that I have learned that our facial expressions for instance can work in reverse. Put a smile on your face and you will become happy. Put a frown on your face and you will become sad. It works, try it. So I can not help but believe that doing ones best to "act" as a woman, would not have a similar effect and bring out those qualities.
Having said that, it is my personal beleif that this is different than having distress with ones own body. The difference between what one would "enjoy" and what one can "tolerate". I don't dress because I enjoy it, although that is a side effect. I dress because I can't stand to pretend I am a man in the way the society wants to think of me any longer.
I hope that helps.
Love always,
Elizabeth
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Anita
- Miss Diamond Goddess
- Posts: 3068
- Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2004 2:55 pm
- Location: Burlingame, CA (San Francisco Bay area)
Hi Maggie--
I tend to agree with you about the decline in external anima 'actors'--that is, women who are willing to exhibit traditional mannerisms, styles of dress, and so on. As a society, we've allowed them to relax their side of the two extremes of gender, while we haven't allowed men the same proportionate freedom. It does create an imbalance, and I do think that there's a collective impulse that tries to correct it.
I was much happier and open around women when I begin to express Anita. The difference was very noticeable, because I didn't need them to carry all the female qualities for us both.
In the short run, this can scare and anger women. It scared and angered men when women first started their own move toward more independence, and taking over traditional male jobs. I can remember those times very well.
If the women can hang in there, the extremism of our beginnings may back off some, too.
I tend to agree with you about the decline in external anima 'actors'--that is, women who are willing to exhibit traditional mannerisms, styles of dress, and so on. As a society, we've allowed them to relax their side of the two extremes of gender, while we haven't allowed men the same proportionate freedom. It does create an imbalance, and I do think that there's a collective impulse that tries to correct it.
I was much happier and open around women when I begin to express Anita. The difference was very noticeable, because I didn't need them to carry all the female qualities for us both.
In the short run, this can scare and anger women. It scared and angered men when women first started their own move toward more independence, and taking over traditional male jobs. I can remember those times very well.
If the women can hang in there, the extremism of our beginnings may back off some, too.